Be Like That
by Aretee
Summary: <html><head></head>The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Rose wants to be like Alice and Edward wants to recreate his parents' happiness. Bella loves Edward, but misses the ease of being with Jake. What will our friends discover about themselves as they stumble through high school? AU, canon couples, no supernatural stuff. Thank you Stephenie Meyer for building me a playground.</html>
1. Chapter 1 Bella

**A/N: So, here's my newest story. I was listening the song by 3 Doors Down called ****_Be Like That_**** and I came up with an idea for a story. This is an AU no vamps or wolves, but I'll keep the themes and canon couples.**

**Every chapter will be a different POV. **

**I'd like to thank my wonderful beta, MarinaNamaste. She helps me round out my thoughts and add the imagery. She keeps the lemonade sweet and tart. :) You should check out her stories, too. She's got a great Jake/Nessie story going on right now.  
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><p>"So my mom's all hell bent on shopping this weekend. God! She can be so annoying!" Alice was droning on and on about how unfair it was that her mom wanted to buy her an "appropriate" homecoming dress.<p>

"Uh-huh," I responded, almost automatically. I had to get my homework done and I knew that Alice only required occasional encouragement to continue her ranting. I loved Calculus and it was easy to get numbers and equations. And they made sense. They didn't let you down. They are predictable.

"I mean, what the hell does _appropriate_ mean, anyway?" Alice didn't even pause for a response, "I'll tell you what it means. It means that she doesn't trust me and she wants to make sure I get some puritanical habit that covers all the goods that the gods have seen fit to bestow upon me. Does that make sense?"

"No. Nuns wear habits and they're Catholic, not Puritans," I replied absent mindedly. I wasn't so bad at history either.

"Bella!" Alice whined, "You're missing the point!"

"No, Alice I got the point," I placated. "I was just pointing out the flaw in your reasoning." I always got Alice's points. They weren't very deep. She was always complaining about how her mom wanted to buy her things that just weren't her style, or the right brand, or the right color. At least Alice's mother was around. Mine flitted off with whatever new scent came wafting in on the slightest breeze. I'd long ago decided that I wasn't interesting enough for her.

"Oh, Bella, who cares about logic when all my mother wants from me is to be a brain-dead, non-thinking, Stepford child with no sense of style."

I didn't answer her this time; I was on my last Calculus problem. I _almost_ had it finished when I heard Alice screech.

"Isabella Swan, are you doing your homework during my major crisis?" Major crisis? Really, Alice?

"Yes, Alice, I am. You know I can multitask," I huffed. It's not like Alice really wanted my opinion or input. I was good about hiding my irritation with Alice most of the time, but calling a day of shopping a major crisis was about all I could handle.

"Bella?" Alice sniffled. Man she had pouting down to an art form. Her tiny voice always pulled at my heartstrings—you know the ones attached to a bucket of guilt.

"I'm sorry, Alice. You know how I need the good grades." I closed my book loudly hoping she could hear it through the cell phone. "I'm finished now." I stood up from my desk and moved over to flop on my bed. Alice had my full attention.

We talked for another half hour—or Alice did, at any rate—I was glad I'd finished with all my homework. Edward was coming over at seven and he also didn't like my attention to be divided. Charlie would be watching the game, so I made sure that he had enough chips and beer so even Charlie wouldn't be a distraction from Edward.

My phone buzzed and I looked at it and frowned at the message from Edward. Shit. I hadn't planned on going out and Edward wanted to go to Port Angeles. Asking Charlie permission to go could bring on a lecture and resisting Edward could make him sulk. And I didn't like to make him sulk. He did so much for me, he cared so much for me; I didn't want to disappoint him. I headed into the kitchen to clean up from dinner and think of the best way to bring this up to Charlie.

"Dad?" I called from the kitchen. I thought it best to do this when he couldn't see me. I could see him in the reflection of the glass in the gun cabinet. Charlie's eyes moved from the television briefly before he glanced back in time to see someone do something good with some ball on a team that Charlie liked. This was a good thing; he'd be in a good mood, at least momentarily.

"Yeah, Bells?" he finally answered after his gruff expression of glee and a round of fist pumps in the air. I loved my dad, but I didn't get his obsession with sports. I didn't get anyone's obsession with sports. It just seemed so pointless.

"I'm going to go to Port Angeles with Edward tonight." I thought it might be better to ask forgiveness than permission. "We have to pick up some supplies for our science project, okay?" It wasn't a complete lie. We _were_ going to pick up supplies. But it also probably meant car sex before he brought me back home.

"It's awful late, Bells. The store still going to be open by the time you get there?" He wasn't really fooled by Edward's polite demeanor in front of Charlie. He'd commented that Edward had the perfect name and called him "that Haskell kid" too much for me to ever think he was fooled. Edward was sincere, but my dad found it hard to like the boy he suspected of bedding his daughter.

"Not if we leave now and Edward is almost here." I tapped my foot on the floor nervously. I didn't quite know if I was more nervous that Charlie was going to give me more grief or if he'd make me late to meet Edward outside.

"I just don't know what those stores in Port Angeles have that we don't have here in Forks, but okay." Charlie's keen eyes held my gaze letting me know he really didn't approve, but was going to let me make my own decision. I'd proven myself to be a pretty responsible person; I didn't lie when he asked a direct question; and he really liked my cooking. He may not approve of all my decisions, but he lets me make them. My mom told me once that's how she knew she'd never come back.

"Charlie never put up a fight. He never begged me to come back. How bad could he really want me?" she'd asked me when I was eleven. E-lev-en. Like I even could possibly understand the complexities of the marital relationship then. No wonder Billy called me an old soul. I'd been forced to take care of my mother and her flighty whims of fancy since before I was in junior high; I finally told her enough was enough and came to live with my (much) more stable dad. Aloof as he was, he was consistent and I liked that. A lot.

As much as I loved Edward, I often wished that my relationship with him was as easy as others in my life. I missed the connection and ease of being with Jacob. Since our dads were best friends, neither of us had a memory of life without the other. It was easy as breathing. We shared all our thoughts and all our feelings. When I came back to Washington we both spilled about our moms. He just needed someone to unload all his grief to. I just needed a place to vent. That was some pretty heavy emotional stuff that brought us together right at the time our bodies decided to hit puberty. Both of us were needy, emotional, hormonal, and horny. We filled the void for the other. Then Edward moved to town.

Edward was…dazzling.

And he chose me. Out of all those girls flinging themselves at him—he chose little old me.

Edward didn't like the way Jake looked at me so I basically cut off all contact with Jake to keep from having the same conversation with Edward every time I spoke to or texted Jake. But Edward was going places and Jake is destined to be chief down on the rez. As much as I admired his heritage and his commitment to it, I wanted to go places, too. I felt that knowing that about myself would shield Jake from the same pain my father carried with him for fifteen years. I didn't want to do to Jake what my mom did to my dad. I loved Jake too much for that.

On the same note, as much as Alice annoyed me at times, when I considered Alice and Jasper's relationship I was a bit envious—I was an only child. Alice just did what she pleased and Jasper was happy to be around her. They were easy and free together—he never seemed to be tired of her. Jasper's nonchalance balanced out the controlling nature of Alice's mother. The only thing Jasper wanted from Alice was to be in her presence. To soak her up and drink her in. When Edward told me that I was like a drug to him, my heart flipped in my chest. He was as into me as I was into him. I could feel it and I could see it. But I had to be careful what I said and about whom I spoke. For Edward, certain topics and people put him in a very dour mood. Between Alice and Edward, I was always walking on eggshells.

I watched Jasper and Alice closely the last time the four of us went to dinner together. Jasper laughed at Alice's jokes, he let her order her own food. Though he knew what kind of soda she liked the best and ordered it while she was in the bathroom. And he listened to her opinions. Of course they'd known each other their whole lives, but it made their familiarity even more appealing. If the two disagreed on something—which was frequently—Jasper would just shake his head and smile. He'd say, "between the two of us, we'd fix the world." It was so different than what I had with Edward.

"We'll have the lobster special with just some water to drink please. Sparkling, not still, with some lemon," Edward said to the waiter without asking me. He ordered for me like in the old, romantic movies. At first I was flattered by the gesture, but I didn't know how to tell him I didn't care for shellfish without causing him to sulk. I didn't know how to navigate that minefield. Alice didn't mind filling him in.

"Bella, since when do you like shellfish? And the lobster special is stuffed with crab. That's like a double whammy for you," Alice giggled with a surprised look on her face.

"I'm trying to cultivate Bella's palate for finer fare than pop tarts and take-out pizza," Edward explained to the little pixie. He really was beautiful. And I heard it was good to retry foods you previously found unpalatable because your tastes change as you age.

"But Bella, it made you sick when you went to my parents' party last year, don't you remember?" Alice pressed, ignoring Edward like he hadn't even spoken.

"It's fine, Alice. I'll try it again," I gazed at Edward and winked hoping I conveyed that I really was okay. "He just wants me to try new things."

"But…" Alice's tried to interrupt again, but Jasper pulled her attention away.

Edward brooded through the main course. I could tell by the way his eyebrows pulled together and he was very quiet. So, I ate with such gusto, to show how much I enjoyed trying new things, that he was fine by the time dessert was delivered. It was a lovely tiramisu, even though I despised the flavor of coffee. Apparently coffee is an acquired taste, as well.

I still didn't like shell fish or coffee, but then I knew how to swallow things I didn't like. That's what love was, right?

I had to convince Charlie later that I had just eaten too fast and I didn't have food poisoning when he found me hugging the toilet later.

But, I couldn't be too angry. The meal was so expensive and Edward was trying to show me things out of my own comfort zone. He was giving me an education into the life he was going to offer me outside of Forks, Washington. That's what he'd explained to me, anyway. I couldn't argue with that. I was just grateful that he continued to date me. My dad didn't make much money and was content to age into retirement in the little town of Forks. That was the reason my devoted mother had left. She wanted bigger and better things. Edward offered me those things and I was going to hang on to him. I was determined not to make my mother's mistakes.

Edward had said that marrying a child from divorced parents was not something he ever wanted to do because it brought unnecessary baggage into an already difficult venture. But he said that I intrigued him, he just couldn't get enough of me—his drug of choice. His heroin. He'd try for me— he'd told me as much.

That made me feel so special—that he liked being with me so much, he was willing to go against something so deep-seeded in his psyche that he'd try for me.

But it also made me so nervous. What if something else happened that just pushed him over the edge? That made him leave? What if I tripped one too many times, would he think I was too clumsy? What if I didn't get the scholarship to Yale or Brown? Would he wait for me? Would he do the long-distance thing? Or, would he find someone there that better suited his life plan?

I was sitting at the table of the freshly cleaned kitchen when my phone buzzed. Edward was waiting outside.

"Gotta go, Dad." I went and kissed him on the forehead.

"Not even going to come to the door, is he? In the old days honking for your date was considered rude."

"Dad, the old days didn't have cell phones. He's told me he's here. Besides, you intimidate him with your overt displays of masculinity," I smiled at my father trying to mollify him.

"I don't know what all of that means, but if you're saying he's scared of my guns, I think that's a good thing. Remind him that I'm a damn good shot too." Charlie also said that I was easier to understand when I was dating Jake. I didn't use so many big words.

"He doesn't need reminding. And I love you."

Charlie cleared his throat. He was never comfortable with declarations of affection—another reason Renee and her immense insecurities ran off. I knew that about him and I used it often as the easiest way to get a quick exit from the room.

I grabbed a hoodie from the hall closet so Edward wouldn't chastise me—I was always cold, and I headed out the front door. I took the steps carefully, ensuring I didn't slip or trip. Edward was waiting to open the car door for me. Charlie may think he's not a gentleman, but he is. He knows how to treat me well and he does. When I reached him, his arms wrapped around me encasing me in his love. His breath was cool as he inhaled my scent. I affected him as much as he affected me. That was so reassuring.

"You're wearing the perfume I got you," he breathed out and kissed my neck. I loved the feel of his warm lips in the space right under my ear. I pulled him closer to me. His hand found the bare strip of skin at my waist and ran up my back sending shivers down my spine. _This_ was part of why I made sure I did everything right. The way he made me feel—no one had ever made me feel so wanted and so desired—not even Jake. I never wanted to _not_ feel this way again. I breathed in his scent and moved so his lips could find my mouth. I knew he would.

"I'll do just about anything to get you to kiss me," I admitted. My brown eyes connected with his green. His lips quirked up in that half-smile he did when I pleased him.

"I know," and he pressed his lips to mine. His kisses were gentle, yet demanding. He set the pace and the intensity and I'd learned to just follow his lead. He'd shut me down if I took it from him. And I needed his kisses. I needed his love. I needed his desire. I needed _him_. He completed me and I didn't know what I'd do if he ever left me.

I must have communicated those feelings somehow in my kiss because he chuckled as he pulled away. "Later, Pet. Let's get to PA first. Then we'll take a detour and finish that conversation." His hand which had slid up my back and under my shirt finally rested on my ass and pulled me close to him. I needed his desire and I could feel just how desired I was against my belly.

I let a satisfied smirk wash over my face. I reached up, placing my hands around his neck. The movement caused my stomach to rub over his desire and he groaned with pleasure.

"Okay," I whispered and sucked his bottom lip quickly but softly. I was good at this part and I knew it.

He opened the car door and I slid inside, making sure that my forearm added pressure to his evident joy as I slipped by him. I noticed the crooked smile again as the door closed and he walked around the front of the car to get in the driver's side seat.

Edward always held my hand when he drove or he touched me in some way. He knew how much I craved the physical affection. He always wanted to give me what I needed and that was why I worked so hard to give him what he wanted.

"How was PE? I know how much you enjoy it," Edward quipped sarcastically, stealing a glance at me.

"Oh my gosh!" I began. "The cheerleaders want to do a whole tumbling and gymnastics unit and they almost had coach talked into it. We're talking balance beams, parallel bars. The works." I scowled at the thought of her entire gym class seeing just how clumsy and uncoordinated I really was. "I don't know why we can't just stick with volleyball," I finally muttered. This was part of our normal routine. Edward and I had most classes together, but he always wanted to know what happened in the two classes we didn't have together. I just pretended to be Jessica for a bit and gossip during these Q&A sessions.

"Hey," Edward pulled my attention to his beautiful face, "it'll be okay. Maybe my dad can write you some sort of doctor's note." His lips twitched into a smile. God, he was beautiful. "We could fake a sprain or something." I smiled back at him because I loved that he was always looking out for me. My buzzing phone pulled my attention to my lap.

"Who is that?" Edward's brow furrowed. "Is it Charlie?" That was always his question when my phone went off when we were together. I knew Edward didn't mind if it was Charlie or even Angela. But when it was Jessica, Mike—who really couldn't take a hint—or, worst of all Jacob, Edward could get a little irritated.

_BELLS! Cum to the annual bonfire plz! I want you to meet my new gf! Bring the wanker if you want._

Shit. It was Jacob.

"Well?" Edward's voice was insistent.

A small spark of hope shone through the void at the prospect of Jacob having a girlfriend possibly calming Edward a little bit. Edward was aware that Jacob was my first everything—and the reason I was so good at many…things—and he didn't like the fact that we were still friends. I'd met Edward and broken up with Jake to date him, but that didn't seem to register in Edward's mind and quell the jealousy I could still see simmering there. So, I'd basically cut off all contact with Jake except when he came over for family stuff. Our dads were still best friends.

"It's Jake," I hazarded a quick glance in his direction. "He's got a new girlfriend and he wants me to meet her at the bonfire," I added quickly. "He's invited you, too."

"You mean he wants to rub her in your face," Edward grumbled. Shit. I saw his mood falling.

"No, Jake's not like that." I still felt so defensive for my friend—especially when crap came from Edward. And Jake wasn't like that. I often envied his carefree attitude and his forgiving nature. He'd forgiven me so easily for dumping him for Edward. He thanked me for being honest and told me that he could manage his feelings for me if only he had my friendship.

"Whatever, Bella. He's a guy. That's what guys do." Edward looked really disgruntled. This side of him could really hurt me. It was almost as if he didn't trust me. But I needed to stop his mood swing and I had to do it fast.

"So," I slid my hand up Edward's thigh, "let's go and show him how happy _we_ are." My fingers grazed the long hard edge of his erection as it bunched against his chinos just as my lips touched the perfect skin on his throat. I let my tongue graze along his stubble before sucking the skin just a little—showing him what I could do…elsewhere. I knew when Edward got that upset over Jacob, I had to show him my loyalty. My thumb found the head of his hard-on and rubbed it through his trousers. The crooked smile returned.

"Okay, you win. Let me drive. I'll let you finish that later."

I settled back in my seat but I didn't miss that Edward's hand was decidedly higher on my thigh when it finally found its resting spot. I placed my hand on top of his entwining our fingers.

Three hours later we sat in the car panting, windows cracked in an attempt to eliminate the fog that had accumulated in a short period of time. "I better get you home before Charlie uses one of those guns he's always cleaning when I actually go into your house." He ran his hands over my breasts that I'd just stuffed back into my bra.

"He wouldn't actually do it." I kissed him again, pushing myself into his palms.

"I know that. I can't wait until you are all mine and I don't have to sneak these moments or share you with anyone." His mouth slammed into mine and his hands cupped my bare ass and pulled me impossibly closer to him.

A small part of my mind wondered if Edward thought that I would cut off all connections with Charlie if and when we ever got married. I didn't quite know what he meant about not having to share me. I could never just abandon Charlie like Renee had already done. But that small little portion of my mind was distracted by what his mouth and hands were doing to my body.

"Come on," I tried to pull away, "I really should get home. I don't want to be late." The last time we'd lost track of time I was grounded for two weeks and both Charlie and Edward were almost impossible to get along with. Edward sulked at school and Charlie lectured me at night. I almost went insane.

"Okay, Pet." He gave me another quick kiss. "This was good tonight." I loved that crooked smile of his. I moved off Edward's lap and back into the passenger seat. I pulled my skirt down and dug my underwear off the floor while Edward resituated himself in the driver's seat.

"Where's my shirt?" I giggled as I turned to look in the back seat. It had landed in the back window and I had to crawl back and retrieve it. When I turned back around to climb back into the front seat I could see him smirking at me.

"What?" I asked, grinning back.

"You have a nice ass."

We were quiet on the short drive to Charlie's house and the windows were completely defogged by the time we pulled into the driveway.

"So I'll pick you up for school tomorrow?" He always asked me this even though he knew I loved to drive my truck. It was a gift from Billy that Jacob serviced on a regular basis.

"I can drive myself," I tried. Edward hated my truck. He said it was an eyesore and he didn't know why I wasn't embarrassed to drive the 'rusting piece of crap.'

"Nonsense, we don't want to add to our carbon footprint do we? I'll pick you up." I looked at my phone in my lap and remembered the bonfire. Maybe I could strike a deal with him.

"Okay," I replied. "But can we go to the Bonfire on Saturday? Please? It's an annual tradition and it would win you some points in Charlie's book if you took me." I pulled my bottom lip in between my teeth. His best friend Emmett told me that Edward thought that was my sexiest expression. Emmett was great for information like that.

"Will you let Alice pick out your outfit?" he asked with a crooked smile. Edward thought Alice had a great sense to style. Too bad that was based on what he saw her wear to school—the clothes her mother bought her.

"Fine," I grumbled. I knew that meant something cute, but completely inappropriate for the beach. But it'd make Edward happy; and going would make Jake and Charlie happy. I was hopeful that for one day of my life, I could make all the important men in my life happy at the same time.

After a few more heated kisses to show my gratitude, Edward walked around the car and opened my car door. I was satisfied. I felt his hungry eyes on me as he watched me walk up the stairs to the porch. I turned around briefly to wave. He was indeed still gawking at me. The door was still unlocked for me and I locked it behind me.

"Did you get everything you needed?" Charlie called from the living room.

"Yeah," I answered with a light tone. "We did. And Edward's taking me to the bonfire on Saturday. Jake invited us both and Edward agreed."

"Did he now?" Charlie mused with a smile. I didn't know if he was pondering Edward or Jake. I picked up the empty beer cans and chip bowl and took them into the kitchen.

"I'm bushed, so I'm going to go to bed," I called from the stairs. I pulled out my phone and happily texted Jake back as I walked up the stairs.

_EDWARD and I will both be there on Saturday. Quit calling him a wanker. You're watching too much BBC. Who's this girl? What's her name? Where'd you meet? I'm so happy for you, Jake!_

My phone buzzed while I was brushing my teeth.

_Nessie is her name nd shes here for a year on a native exchange program. Shes goin to skool here  
>shes awesome bells u r goin 2 luv her<em>

_I'm sure I will, Jake. I'll see you then. ly_

_ly2 bellz_

I had one more text to send before I went to bed.

_I need you to pick out a SUITABLE outfit to wear to a bonfire on Saturday. I need to stay warm, but I need Edward to like it. Are you up for the challenge?_

I changed into my pajamas thinking about how nice it would be if all the men in my life could get along. My phone buzzed again.

_R U KIDDING ME? YES IM UP FOR THE CHALLENGE_

It was just like Alice to squeal through a text message. I could almost hear it. Another buzz.

_B over after school and b4 my dance class in PA_

_Okay. Love you, Alice. Good night._

I slipped beneath my sheets and blankets. I was completely exhausted. I always felt exhausted these days. I wondered if life and relationships were always this hard.

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><p><strong>Please leave me some love and tell me what you think. I plan on posting once a week. More love means more motivation to post. Just sayin'.<br>**


	2. Chapter 2 Rosalie

**A/N: As always, I need to thank MarinaNamaste for her beta work. She really helps fill in some gaps. Her stories are great, too. Go check them out.**

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><p>"I never pretend to know what Alice wants, Em, I just nod and smile." I closed my locker door and spun the dial on the lock.<p>

"You're a good person, Rosie." I loved it when Emmett kissed my nose. "That's why I love you."

"There are a lot of people who would disagree with you," I intoned looking into his hazel eyes. I never knew what color they were going to be. Some days they were blue and some days they were green. Today, they were a beautiful combination of both.

"What, that I love you or that you're a good person?" He pulled on my arm and we began walking down the hallway to class.

"No one doubts you love me," I squeezed his hand, "and they're all jealous." It brought out his dimple when he smiled his little bashful smile. Damn I loved that. How did I get so lucky to find him? "But some would question how good of a person I am," I finished even though he distracted me. I doubted how good of a person I was. I just had these hateful thoughts I couldn't control. That usually led to me saying things that were just bitchy.

"That's because they either A) pissed you off and you let them know it, B) they're jealous of how beautiful you are and you intimidate them, or C) they don't know you and just assume you're too beautiful to be nice."

"I don't care what they think of me," I started to explain, but it wasn't true. Well, I didn't care what other catty people thought of me. But I wanted good people to think good things about me.

"I know," he leaned in to kiss me softly, "another thing I love."

"Knock that off, you two," Ms. Vaughn said from her doorway, "save it for after school." We both just smiled at her. She was always telling kids to quit touching in the halls. Maybe she needed to get some herself.

"So what does Alice want to do at your house today? Can I come over and watch?" He waggled his eyebrows. I squealed as I slapped him on the chest. I could feel the rippling of his pecs as he flexed at my assault. He was a well-oiled machine. I'd like to oil his machine. He didn't need to know that, though. Not yet.

"You're disgusting!"

"What?" he feigned innocence.

"You know what, you pervert," I laughed. He wasn't really a pervert, he was just an eighteen year old red-blooded male. He smiled that dimpled grin at me again. "But please come over. You're good at absorbing some of Alice's energy." We'd reached my class and he pulled me close.

"I have to. I drove you to school, remember?" He kissed my nose again. I just smiled back at him as he walked that cute ass away from me.

"God, Rosalie, go in already," Jessica bellowed from behind me. I guess I was blocking the doorway. "Of course I don't mind that view." I watched her as she stared at _my_ Emmett as he walked down the hall. What a bitch. While I know my man is faithful to me, and I can't stop other women from looking at his fabulousness—and he is fabulous, I didn't expect them to blatantly drool over him in front of me.

"Drool, much?" I asked giving her my best knock-it-off-bitch smile. "Mike not fulfilling your…ah…needs?" I heard Lauren titter behind her and I knew I had gone too far. If Lauren thinks it's funny, then it's too mean. Shit. Why was I like that?

We all dropped our bags by our desks at the back of the room. Jess didn't look happy. "He's still fucking hung up on Bella. I mean, seriously, what makes her so fucking special?" Jessica huffed.

"I know, right?" Lauren chimed in. "She's got them all drooling after her. Even in La Push. She must be giving it out to everyone because she is _not_ all that."

"Wow, Lauren, that shade of green does _not_ suit you," I said. I didn't particularly care for Bella, but I knew she wasn't a slut. She was dating Em's best friend, who I also didn't like very much. But I wasn't going to bad mouth either of them.

"What do you care?" Lauren asked. "You don't like her." I really needed to learn to conceal my feelings better. Maybe I'd ask Jasper how he does it.

"You're right, I don't. But that doesn't mean I would go around accusing her of whoring around just because I was jealous of her. I don't need to do that to feel better about myself." I let the implication hang in the air. Neither one of them said anything for a few moments. "But," I turned to Jessica, "I do think Mike needs to get a clue. Your question should be 'what the fuck is wrong with Mike?' Bella has been very clear that she is completely uninterested."

"So you don't think she's leading him on?" Jessica asked her eyes big with worry. I pitied her constant need for validation. Lauren scoffed. I narrowed my eyes at Lauren and then turned my gaze to Jessica.

"I've heard her tell Mike straight up that she was not interested. On a separate occasion I heard her tell him that she was dating Edward. _And_ I heard her complaining to Edward just the other day that he still wouldn't take no for an answer. And all of this was _after_ she turned him down last year when she was dating that Jake kid from La Push," I answered.

"He is not such a kid anymore," Lauren interjected. "Have you seen him lately? Edward's fine and all, but why she dumped Jake for him I really don't know, because that _man_," she emphasized the word, "is straight up hawt."

I didn't know why she dumped Jake for Edward, either. Edward is a controlling stick in the mud who made Bella feel guilty if he didn't get his way in every single little thing. It was totally annoying and it made me hate being around the pair of them. And that was hard since Emmett loved Edward. Em must see a completely different side of Edward, because I saw nothing endearing.

"I know, right?" Jessica asked Lauren. Mr. Varner started class and I let myself get lost in the lesson and my thoughts as well. The point was I tuned out Jessica and Lauren. I hung out with them because I was _supposed_ to hang out with them and not because I really liked them. My dad did business with their dads and my dad asked a million questions about them all the time. It was easier just to know the answers. Jessica's smirk caught my eye. She was looking at the doodle I had drawn of Emmett holding Jasper by his left foot dipping him into a river and Alice reminding him to dip the foot too, so he doesn't get hurt later. Alice was so good at thinking ahead. If Achilles would have had Alice, he probably would have survived. Alice was all about the details.

I was just grateful that dad loved Alice just like everyone else loved Alice. She had her quirks, but she was honest and real. She understood me because her mom was just like my dad. We'd bonded over the rehashing of lectures about social and civic responsibility. Oh, and being friends with the right people. My dad insisted that I at least be nice to Bella Swan because the friendship could come in handy one day; her father being a cop and all. My father didn't appreciate Emmett and his less than squeaky clean past.

"Rose?" Jessica's irritated whisper finally caught my attention when she kicked my desk.

"What?" I hazarded a glance towards Mr. Varner. Apparently he was done lecturing and had given us an assignment to work on. I looked at the screen and began copying down the assignment that was projected there.

"What are you doing this weekend?" Jessica asked. "I was going to see if Mike will do something and he's always more open to double dates."

"When is he going to realize he'd get more action if he took you out alone?" Lauren giggled.

"At the rate he's going, he'll be lucky he gets to first base," Jessica mumbled. I didn't know why she chased after him so much. He was okay to look at, but his flapping mouth ruined anything aesthetically pleasing about him. He just didn't know what to say or how to say it.

"Tonight I'm going to PA with Em to see a movie," I raised my eyebrow, "and you're not invited." Lauren OOO'ed in the background. "And tomorrow night I have to go out with some idiot that my dad is trying to set me up with. It's so stupid, but my dad will continue to try."

"So can I go out with Emmett?" Lauren asked. I think she meant it as a joke, but I didn't think it was funny.

"Do you think he'd even say yes to that proposition?" I asked dryly. "Honestly." That obviously didn't sit well with Lauren. I had pushed her too far. I saw the anger flare in her eyes.

"Well, I wouldn't hold out on him like you've been doing, that's for sure. He might just go out with me because I'm not a frigid tease and I'd give him some action," she pouted crossing her arms across her less than ample chest. Wow. Did she really think that sex was the only way to a man's heart?

"Actually, the boys are doing a game night at Edward's tomorrow," I said nonchalantly and trying very hard to hide my own irritation. "But they're playing Grand Theft Auto, maybe you can go be their real life hooker." I looked at Jessica whose jaw had dropped open and she was beginning to smile. "Oh, hookers charge money, right? It's a _whore_ who gives it away for free." The bell rang and I packed up my stuff and left Lauren stewing. God, I hated that bitch. I hated that I was such a bitch. I hated that she actually made me consider that Emmett was disappointed that I was holding out on him. He was always joking about it. Did he need more?

The rest of the day wasn't any better, well until I saw Emmett again. Emmett and Alice were the only two people I could really be myself around. I didn't have to try to be nice, and I was really bad at faking that. I didn't have to put up any fronts, either. They knew how to take my bitchiness and they called me out on it when it was too much. I could trust them to do that; I relied on them to do that—and they did.

"Hey, babe," Emmett whispered as he kissed my cheek. I clung to him for a moment and just soaked in his goodness. People thought he was this big time thug, but he was really just soft and squishy and warm. He let me leech his energy and sometimes I wondered if I ever gave him anything back.

"Hey," I mumbled from somewhere in his massive chest. "I missed you. I haven't been very nice today." He already knew by the way I clung to him. He always told me I was an open book to him.

"Yeah, apparently I get a free whore tomorrow night while you're off doing your daddy's business," Emmett laughed. I groaned and hugged him tighter.

"What did Jessica tell you?" I asked when I finally pulled my head back to look at him.

"That Lauren is spitting nails, but that she deserved it," he smiled as he rubbed reassuring circles up and down my back. "But we're playing Skyrim tomorrow, not Grand Theft Auto, so I told Lauren she shouldn't bother coming by." I chuckled at him. He was trying to cheer me up.

"Why can't I control myself around her? I have control around Edward and Bella, but Lauren is a completely different story." Emmett kissed my cheek again and pulled me to the passenger-side door that he opened so I could slide in. I tried to gather myself as he walked around to the driver's side.

"Babe," he said after closing his own door, "Edward and Bella keep to themselves and are not nasty about others. Lauren tears down everything and everyone around her. You're the only one brave enough to put her in her place and we need people like you to do it. And, you only do it when she's really out of line." I did it all the time. But, it did make me feel better. I was trying and he saw it. I didn't know what I did to deserve this man sitting beside me. He saw me. He got me. He could infuriate me with his asinine boy humor, but even then he knew how to calm me down.

"I get it. But I feel like she needs to know how she makes other people feel, so I just do it back to her. It's hard not to be a bitch when you're surrounded by them. Gah! I shouldn't have to work that hard at being nice." If I was honest with myself, though, I was scared. I was scared that Lauren was right and that maybe Emmett did want more than what I was giving him. I was pretty sure he wouldn't cheat on me, but would he leave me if I didn't give it up?

"What?" he asked leaning over the center console towards me. His cologne smelled leathery with a hint of citrus and I breathed it in as he came closer. "You're still worried about something." Damn him. He knew me so well.

"Well," I stammered. This was Emmett. My Em. I could tell him anything. "Did Jessica tell you what set me off?" He was quiet and I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I could tell he wanted me to look at him.

"Rose," his voice was soft and pleading. I couldn't look up. He'd see it if I looked up. He'd see my fear and he'd know I doubted him. "Rosie, look at me, please." My eyes moved from the steering wheel to his hand to his muscular wrists. Who has muscular wrists? Seriously, the man was buff and a perfect specimen of a testosterone god. Why didn't I just give it up to him? His forearms were well formed and his biceps made me weak in the knees, especially when he flexed them back and forth to get me to laugh. He wasn't trying to get me to laugh right now, though. He wanted me to hear him. Slowly I let my eyes find his. They were blue in the dull light of the Forks afternoon. A few beams of sunlight had found a few breaks in the clouds and one seemed to be smiling down on Emmett's classic car.

"Yes?" I asked.

"I told you I'd wait. I told you that it didn't matter to me how long it took you to be ready. You know I want you. You know how badly I want you. But I'm not a Neanderthal. I don't just want your vagina. I want all of you." He tipped my chin up with his massive index finger. "And, I want no part of Lauren. I don't want her company and I don't want her skanky, drippy hole that most boys have already plundered." He'd made me smile anyway. "Rosalie Hale, I want you and whatever you decide to give me." My heart thudded in my chest and I threw my arms around his neck.

"I love you, Emmett McCarthy!" I hadn't actually said it this straight forward before, though I'd implied it so many times. But I did love him. I loved him for so many reasons. He'd told me on numerous occasions that he loved me, but I just couldn't let myself fully believe him. But I did believe him now. We sat there in the car just hugging for what seemed like hours.

When I finally pulled away, I saw tears on his cheeks, too. "Really, you mean it?" he asked. I wiped his tears away with my thumbs and smiled at his perfect dimpled face and nodded.

"I probably shouldn't have told you in the school parking lot, but, yes, I love you completely." I barked a laugh, "and you probably shouldn't let the football team see you balling like a baby. They'll call you a pussy."

"I don't care." He pulled me in for another hug. That there, in his car—no one saw that Emmett. He only showed this to me. They only saw the jokester Emmett, the crass Emmett, the burping and farting jock-strap Emmett, the car thief Emmett. That's why my dad hated him. I saw the real him. He trusted me with it and it was so fragile and soft, I knew I had to treat it with the utmost care.

"Come on," I said after a few more moments, "or Alice will skin our hides if we make her late for her own date with Jasper."

He chuckled into my neck. "I wouldn't wish the wrath of Alice on my worst enemy," then pulling back, one arm still around my shoulder, he gave me that smile, "well…maybe your dad."

I scoffed as he started his restored '69 Camaro Rally Sport and the V-8 engine rumbled to life. My dad did like his car, and he was impressed that Emmett had restored it himself. But that's where my father's regard ended. All his other efforts went into dividing us.

"So she's got a date with Jasper?" he asked me.

"No one knows what to call it," I answered. They were so in love I could tell. "He's taking her to her dance class in Port Angeles."

* * *

><p>"Why are you raiding my closet for clothes for Bella?" I asked the crazy little brunette who was buried in my closet.<p>

"Because she's going to a bonfire tomorrow and," I could hear her strain to reach something high, "Edward wants her looking hot." She stuck her head out to give me the rest of the list. "She wants to stay warm, and my clothes are too small for her," she said disappearing again. "And, you rarely wear something more than once. You can spare them," Alice chirped from inside the closet again.

"So you're dressing her for Edward?" I asked. I couldn't believe the ways people bent over backwards for that uptight prick.

"Well, Bella likes him to be happy and she is painfully aware that she has no sense of fashion," Alice's voice was muffled because her tiny body was completely buried in the racks of my walk-in closet. I did have a lot of clothes, but that was because my father insisted that I always have the right ensemble for the right occasion.

"She has a sense of fashion and her own style. It's just that prick doesn't seem to appreciate it." I couldn't believe I was defending Bella. It sickened me how she bent her will so much to accommodate him. She needed to grow a backbone.

"Come on, Rose," Alice scoffed as she emerged to show her indignation. "Oversized bowling shirts and converse are not at the height of fashion." She went back in and threw two skirts and a number of tops out on to my bed.

"She has her own style and she wears it proudly. It's about the only thing about her I like, and you two are trying to change it," I argued. I knew there were other things about Bella to like, I just couldn't get past her wishy-washy-ness around Edward.

"Why do you hate him so much? I know your dad wanted you to date him for a while. I get being pissed off that he's stuck in some medieval age where fathers get to make economic and political alliances by marrying off their daughters, but that's not Edward's fault." She must have been looking at my shoes because her voice was closer to the door of the closet.

"It's not just that my dad wanted me to date him; it was Edward's assumption that I would just like him _because_ my dad wanted me to date him. It was like—he thought that my dad's approval was all that was required for him to take liberties." I shuddered at the memory.

"He didn't force himself on you did he?" Alice's shocked face emerged from the doorway. I glanced over to Emmett who was playing the Xbox with headphones. I'd told him all this, but it pained him to hear it. Edward was his best friend and he could deal if he didn't think about it too much.

"No. No, nothing like that. But he went from 'Hi Rose' to sliding his hand up my thigh and trying to shove his tongue down my throat. When I made it clear I wasn't in to him he stopped." That was when Edward was the new hot commodity in town and very few people even knew we went out and I think we both liked it that way.

"So you've kissed him?" Alice whispered just in case Emmett could hear.

"He kissed me for about three seconds before I had his nut sack in a vice and then he stopped. We had a nice dinner after that and we haven't talked much since," I explained. Alice giggled. "Then something happened and Edward saved Emmett's ass somehow and they've been best buds ever since."

"What happened?" Alice asked conspiratorially.

"I have no idea, and I wouldn't tell you if I did. That's between them and if and when Emmett tells me it will probably be in confidence. You know I love you Alice, but I love him, too." Her busy activity stopped and when I looked down at her she was grinning at me. "What?" I asked.

"You love him." It was a statement not a question. And, she was happy for me. "Rose, I wouldn't want you to betray that. I'm sorry." She pulled me into a little hug and squealed into my ear.

"You two trying to make me jealous or horny?" Emmett boomed loudly because he still had his headphones on. I shushed him even though my dad wasn't home. He smiled at me. I wanted to suck that dimple out of his cheek he was so sweet. He went back to playing his game.

"So what do you see in Bella?" I asked Alice. I really wanted to like her. I really did. I just couldn't like a jellyfish.

"She's one of the most giving people I know. She'll do whatever she can to help her friends and she's smart. I'll admit that she's a bit co-dependent on Edward, but she takes really good care of her father," Alice replied while laying out different outfits on my bed.

"I love her dad. He's a funny guy," I admitted. I worked as an intern in the sheriff's office last summer. He had a really dry sense of humor and most people didn't catch the comments he made under his breath. "And he does love her. I remember he did a background check on Edward." Alice gasped. "No shit. When they finally went public with their little relationship I'd just started working in the office, he called me into his office and asked me if I knew him; what I knew about him, all that kind of stuff. I told him I'd gone on a date with him and that he was okay and then he asked me why I didn't keep going out with him. I told him it was a set up by my dad, to which he rolled his eyes—another reason I like him so much, he gets it—and that he just wasn't my type," I gushed all of that like I was Jessica. Though I'd never tell Jessica any of that. Alice's eyes were as big as saucers.

"Did he say anything else?" she asked.

"No, I saw the background file open on the computer. Edward's too straight-laced to have a record. I think he's too straight-laced to have any fun at all." I felt Em's arms wrap around me and he lifted me off my feet.

"Eddie's a hoot, you just intimidate him," he growled in my ear. "You put him in his place and now he dresses right instead of left."

"So none of his pants fit anymore? Was the stick up his ass before or after I set him straight?" I grinned.

"Rosie," he kissed my cheek, "give the guy a break. He's lettin' Jasper and me use his systems while you go on a date with someone else tomorrow. He's doing me a solid." He gave me a squeeze to reassure me that he wasn't really upset that I had to go out with someone else tomorrow. "Who is the lucky guy anyway?"

"I don't know," I answered. "I try not to remember their names until they come to the door." I kissed his lips. I felt his lips part and I let my tongue search for his. He always let me lead and then he took over. His lips moved down my neck and that's when Alice turned around for an opinion.

"Holy fuck, guys! Get a room!" she exclaimed.

"We are in my room," I breathed out as Emmett nibbled the tendon at the base of my neck. "You're the third wheel." I could feel him smile against my neck.

"Okay, I think I got it. Tell me what you think and I'll have Jazz come pick me up," Alice bustled. She held up the ensemble she put together for Bella.

"Eddie'll love it," Emmett mumbled not even looking. He was still kissing my neck. Once I invited him, he sent serious and continuous RSVPs.

"You didn't even look," Alice pouted.

"You picked it out," Emmett came up for air, "and he likes your style. Just make sure Bella is warm enough." I giggled as he moved to the other side of my neck. Damn that felt good! His arm was wrapped around my waist and it pulled me in close. I loved to feel his muscles bunch and constrict against me-his biceps, his pecs, his abs, his thighs. The other hand found my butt and one his thighs slipped between mine while his lips were still busy on my neck.

"Rosalie?" my father's voice called from the down the hall. My heart dropped and immediately felt the loss of Emmett's heat.

"Fuck," I muttered a little unsteadily on my feet. Emmett slid back into his chair, put the headphones back on, and un-paused his game just as my dad walked through my open bedroom door. My dad's eyes landed on Emmett's back and flickered to his high score and then to Alice.

"Alice!" my dad's voice was surprised. "I didn't see your car outside," my dad greeted her. I thought I better play nice and make sure he's in a good mood.

"Hey, daddy!" I skipped over to him and kissed his cheek. "You're home early."

"Jasper dropped me off and Emmett is going to take me back home," Alice chirped.

"Hey baby," he hugged me. "Glad to see you're not home alone." I knew what that meant. Someone informed him that Emmett's car was parked outside. "Jasper couldn't stay?" he turned back to Alice still holding me to his side.

"He had some things to take care of before we all go to Port Angeles tonight." I loved Alice. She knew how to smooth over anything. We weren't going to PA together, but she didn't lie, either. At the same time, she let dad know my plans so I didn't have to dance around it later.

"Good, Alice, but I don't think Rosalie's clothes are going to fit you," he looked down as Alice traipsed back and forth putting all the unchosen items away.

"It's not for me," she winked at him. Alice Brandon just winked at my dad. "It's for Bella Swan. She's got no sense of style because Rosalie has hogged it all." She beamed at me. I could see what she was doing there, too. So many bases covered to appease my very social-conscious dad.

"The chief's daughter?" my dad asked. Like he didn't know.

"Yes," Alice answered and then turned to Emmett. "Emmett," she called, but he couldn't hear her—or at least he pretended. "Em!" she yelled a little louder and he looked over at her and pulled his earphones off.

"Oh, hey Mr. Hale," Em pretended to be surprised to see him there. He stood up to shake his hands. My father complied with a tight smile. "What can I do for you Alice?"

"Can you drop me by Bella's house on our way out of town? You said you needed to talk to Chief Swan anyway, right?" Alice asked.

"What do you need to talk about with Chief Swan?" my dad said after he cleared his throat. It looked like he was gloating.

"Well, sir," Emmett started, "I've been working on his police cruiser and I need to give him an estimate before I can proceed. He needs the paperwork trail so the department can process the billing."

"Charlie doesn't take it to a garage?" my dad asked looking genuinely confused.

"He used to, but they overcharge. I tried to do it for cost, but he insists on paying me for labor," Emmett chuckled. "I got into a sticky situation a few years ago and Charlie's trying to keep me out of trouble. He keeps an eye on me." My dad gave him an appraising look. He knew about Emmett's troubles and we'd had quite a few arguments about the image I was presenting to the town by associating with Em. My dad seemed to be considering Emmett's frank confession and Chief Swan's trust in him. I had never even considered playing that angle.

God bless Alice again. It's like she had a sixth sense.

"Well, you kids have fun and stay out of trouble, okay?" He looked over and smiled at me again. I gave him a hug.

"Thanks, daddy. See you tomorrow morning. We're still doing breakfast, right?" Saturday morning breakfasts were a family tradition. They get sporadic during football season, but we have an off weekend.

"Yeah, we are." He kissed me on the forehead and whispered in my ear, "I'm proud of you baby. Thank you for being trustworthy." I couldn't tell if it was a guilt trip or if he truly was proud of me for having my bedroom door open and Alice here while Emmett was in my room. I hated his rules and I detested the fact that he forced me to go on dates with the sons of his business associates, but I really think he _thought _he had my best interest at heart. I had one more year until college—I could hold out until I was out from under his roof.

I learned that lesson from my older sister. If you don't turn up the heat, then the pot can never boil.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So any thoughts? Whatcha think of Rose? Do you feel anything? Like her? Don't like her? Why? What do you think of Bella? Why?  
><strong>

**Next up: Jake.  
>Stay tuned and leave me some love.<br>**


	3. Chapter 3 Jacob

**A/N: So I did some research on the Oneida tribe in New York state and the legends I found and wrote about are their _actual_ legends. I did not make that stuff up. And it fit my story and purposes so well it's like I was _meant_ to write it. I don't know what that means, but I LOVE it! Just taught my AP kids about Tecumseh and his brother, Tenskwatawa. More of that legend may pop up later.  
><strong>

**My beta is MarinaNamaste. She's an Awesome Aussie. Check out her stories. She really knows how to make some lemonade. Check out her one-shots. They're awesome!**

* * *

><p>"Jake? What time are you heading to the beach?" my dad bellowed from the small cramped living room and through the front door. He may be in a wheel chair, but his voice is like the wind whose fingers permeate every crack and hole. I huffed my way back up the hill from my little shed garage because I didn't want all of La Push to hear our conversation and shit. I went in the front door, but left it open. It was a semi-dry day and we were airing out the little shit-hole house we lived in.<p>

"I was going to go down around five. We loaded all the stuff in Paul's truck and Sam and some of the other guys are going to set everything up," I recited the plan we concocted last night at the diner.

"Why aren't you helping set things up?" Billy asked. I knew what he was getting at. He wanted me to take some responsibility and step up. But I didn't want it yet. Sam was more than willing to head things up this year and I was hoping he wanted the gig for the next five or six years so I could head off to college and then come back and settle down.

"Because Sam knows what he's doing and I want to hang out with Ness." There was no point trying to lie to the geezer. He could spot my half-truths a mile away. Surprisingly, his lips bent up in a small smile. He really liked Nessie. That was important to me because I didn't think he'd like anyone as much as he liked Bella. He was mad at me for a week when Bella dumped me. He said maybe I should have thought more before getting involved with his best friend's daughter and then messing it up. I know he really just missed Bella being around. She gave the place a feminine touch. "I want to show her a good time and I can't do that if I have to worry about all the little details," I explained.

"Son," he started, but I cut him off. I knew what he was going to say. Tribe responsibility and all that blah, blah, blah shit. I just wanted a few years to myself. Just a few. I figured I could sort my shit out and come back settled.

"Dad, Sam needs to do this for a few years. He _wants_ to do it for a few years. I want to go to college. And I want to come back home and do everything you want me to do. I want those things, too. But there's no point in taking over this year just to be gone for the next four or five." He frowned, but I could tell he heard me. He was digesting it. It was hard for him because my sisters hadn't come back yet. "Besides, we want to make a good impression on our exchange student, don't we? So she can take good reports back to the reservations back east." I smiled and nodded. My dad called it my shit-eating smile.

This could actually go my way. If I was going to take on this ceremonial gig as Chief one day, then I had to be the face of the tribe and leave the 'details' to others who were capable. If I was worried about the structure of the bonfire, or the amount of food being offered, then who would show our lovely exchange student a good time and tell her all the tribal legends that explain why we hold such a celebration. I knew I was going out on a limb with that kind of justification, but good leaders know how to delegate. And I was delegating.

"So, you're calling this delegation?" he asked. How the fuck did he always know what I was thinking?

"Well," I stammered in my surprise, "yes, I am. Sam and I discussed it last night."

"I gotcha son," he relented and then smiled. "When do I get to see Ness again," he asked with a glint in his eye. She was a little spitfire and I know he liked all the trouble she gave him.

"She should be here in a little while. We were going to study before the bonfire," I said.

Again, he didn't believe me. "Yeah, study." His fingers made little air quotation marks and he smirked.

"What? We are," I insisted. We weren't going to study. Why did I even try?

"Well you better get some kissing in soon, because Charlie tells me that Bella is coming to the bonfire tonight. You won't be gettin' any for a while after that," he chuckled to himself.

"What do you mean?" I asked. What the hell was he talking about?

"I mean, you invited your ex-girlfriend—who's a paleface—to a tribal function that will be attended by your new girlfriend," he said. I just stared at him and he started back like I was missing something obvious.

"And?" I asked after a few awkward seconds of this.

"Your new girlfriend is going to be pissed, Jake. Tell me you're not this dumb," he finished in that dead pan tone he used when I was missing something I should know.

"Nessie's fine with it. It was her suggestion," I squeaked. Shit. I hated that. I cleared my throat to reset my "rumbling bass" that Nessie's told me she loves so much. "I've told her about Bella and she wants to meet my best friend," I explained.

"You better talk to her about it then. She may have suggested it but, in my experience, girls often change their minds about what they want once they get it," he opined. That hit a nerve. Bella had dumped me for Edward. She changed her mind. I could see his point. But, Nessie was completely honest and completely open.

"Nessie's not like that," I finally said. Though he did have me a little worried.

"Okay, son. I'd still have a talk with her before Bella gets here, just in case. Learn from this old buzzard's mistakes," he said.

"What? You invited an ex to something mom was at?" I asked, hoping to get him talking about the good old days. He didn't look so melancholy when he actually talked about mom and the past. A little gleam actually returned when he did.

"No. I just made assumptions about how your mom was feeling that landed me in a whole lot of hot water," he chuckled again. "Don't assume you know how a woman feels. It changes too fast." I knew that last bit from my own shitty experience. It was fast.

"Okay dad, I'll talk to her," I agreed. I didn't want to fuck this up with Nessie. She was too…perfect. I mean, she had her flaws and shit, but she was perfect for me. We fit together. She pushed me to be better; to run faster; to jump higher. She made me all philosophical and shit. I felt smart around her—like I could change the world. I wanted to change the world. I wanted to change my little part of the world here on the rez. I wanted to make it a better place to be, with more opportunities. Her voice pulled me from my thoughts.

"Jake?" I turned my head around to see that beautiful face staring at me from the open doorway. The light from the unusual sunshine shone through her long skirt and peasant top and revealed her slim but curvy figure. Fuck me, she was beautiful. Her dark auburn waves were wound in two long, loose braids that hung over her shoulders with stray pieces that framed her face. "You okay?" she asked as she pulled the strawberry tootsie pop out of her mouth and smiled. I grinned back at her.

"Fantastic! Just thinkin' 'bout you and shit," I said, crossing the room in three steps and sweeping her up into my arms. I didn't want to lie. She made me want to tell her everything. She dropped her bag and squealed in delight as I swung her around. I wanted to kiss her, but my dad was just staring at us from his chair in the corner of the room chuckling to himself again.

"Billy!" she squealed into my ear when she finally noticed him. She patted on my shoulder, cuing me to put her down. I obeyed and she popped that strawberry sucker back into her mouth and skipped over to give him a hug. I have never wanted to be a piece of candy before in my life. I did now. "How you doin' Earnhardt?" She started calling him NASCAR drivers' names since she saw him coasting down the hill to the Clearwater's house.

"I'm trying to maintain my composure, Nessie. It's good to see you. How are you doing?" he asked and almost blushed under her attention.

She was fussing with some dirt that was on the hand rails of his chair. "I'm good. Been busy with the reflective journal I'm supposed to be keeping as part of the exchange program. I finally got permission to turn it into a blog. They're actually going to grade my blog. That takes a load off my mind." She pulled her lollipop out her mouth again and smiled, satisfied with her own little academic victory.

"So it doesn't bother you that Jacob invited his ex-girlfriend to the bonfire tonight?" What. The. Fuck? No beating around the bush for my dad, is there? My heart almost stopped once I realized what he asked her.

"Heck no!" Nessie said not even pausing to think about it. "I'm actually perplexed by her," Nessie called from the kitchen where she'd gone to get a damp cloth to clean my dad's fucking chair. I was falling for her hard. She walked back by me holding the last bit of the tootsie pop up to my lips. I opened my mouth to accept her gift. There was something sexy as shit about that.

"How so?" dad asked. I was still marveling at the care she was giving my dad. It's like she didn't even give it a second thought. Hell, I didn't. I wouldn't have noticed the little mud splatters on his chair, but Nessie did. And it was just natural for her to go take care of it.

"Well," she peeked up at me and smiled, "she's bright enough and entertaining enough to hold Jacob's interest," she said, as she finished wiping off the hand rails. I bit into the tootsie pop and chewed the chocolate center, "but stupid enough to dump him for someone else."

She took the cloth back into the kitchen and came out a few seconds later where she then wrapped her arms around my waist which was reassuring after such a statement. I pulled her in tight. "I also want to meet this man—" she looked at me, "Edward's his name?" I nodded. She looked back at Billy. "I want to meet the man who has sunshine shining out his ass."

Yep. I was in love.

"You're taking this rather flippantly, Ness. Are you sure you'll feel the same way when she's actually there?" Billy asked. He really was concerned and shit. I didn't know whether feel good that he cared so much or offended that he thought I'd fuck things up again.

"Dad!" I chided. "Lay off." Did he think I couldn't handle this myself? Well, probably not. I _did_ fuck up the whole Bella thing. I told her I loved her _way_ too early. And I really wasn't _in love_ with her; I loved the way I felt when I was with her. And when we fucked. But when I was finally honest with myself—after all the Edward shit—I wasn't _in_ love with her.

"It's okay, Jake," Nessie soothed me by reaching up and touching my cheek, "he's making a valid point." I could smell her sweet, sexy, strawberry breath and it made me smile all over again. She turned back to Billy. "I don't know. We'll see. But I won't take it out on Jake. This was my idea," she looked back at me, "not his."

"Alright," my dad was wheeling himself back to the front porch, "I'm off to the Clearwater's. They'll take me over to the beach, so I'll just meet you two there." He smirked at me before he rolled down the ramp. So much for Nessie's cleaning job. He was deliberately leaving us alone in the house. He wanted us to talk, I guess. I wanted to do something else with my mouth though. I must have been smirking as I led her to the couch.

"Jacob Black, what are you thinking?" she batted her eyelids at me. She wanted my mouth to do the same thing I did. So I pulled her onto my lap and kissed her. She still tasted all like strawberry and shit.

"There's the rest of my tootsie pop," she murmured after coaxing my tongue with hers. She was rather tall, which I wasn't really used to, but also very flexible so her legs folded up nicely as she straddled my lap and kissed me with the same fervor I showed to her.

"I'm thinking my dad left us alone for a reason," her lips were moving down my neck where she sucked hard. I know what John Melloncamp was talking about when he told his baby to make it hurt so good. She was giving me a hickey and I didn't even want to stop her. "I think we're supposed to talk."

She sat back onto my knees and grinned. "You think so?" I couldn't help but grin back at her. But I had to be serious for a moment. She felt it and her grin faded to a small smile that made the edges of her full lips curve up.

"Do you remember the first time that we kissed?" I asked her. It hadn't been that long ago. I wondered how I could feel so strongly about her already.

"Ah, yeah. It was only three weeks ago," she pretended to look at her watch. "Three weeks and fourteen hours and almost fifteen minutes." Wow. She was accurate and shit. Could she feel as strongly about me? I was totally not used to reciprocated feelings. I kissed her lightly to show my appreciation.

"Well, I want you to know that I kissed you because I felt like," I searched for words, "like, if I didn't…my life would be missing something. I was drawn to you. It was almost like I couldn't breathe right if I weren't sitting right next to you." She tilted her head as she listened. "I hope that doesn't sound corny."

"No," she whispered like she agreed, "but I feel like there's a 'but' coming." I saw a look of fear creep over her face.

"No!" I shook her hips and pulled her hands up to my chest. "No buts. I want to make a comparison so you don't get jealous tonight. Can you listen to everything I'm going to say?" The fear on her face left and a slight smile played across her lips.

"I'll give it a try." Her complexion was so clear like smooth caramel from the inside of a Cadbury's Caramello. You know the ones from England and shit? That shit is tasty, just like her. Her steady gaze offered me trust with those hazel eyes that looked almost surreal with her dark skin. It was beautiful.

"When I kissed Bella for the first time, it was a decision we both made. It wasn't an impulse. We'd grown up together and then we were going through puberty together. We kissed because we were both curious. We did…everything we did because we were curious. Then I thought my curiosity was something more." Her hands were still clutched in mine and I was afraid to let go of them before I finished. "I _thought_ I was in love with her. Then she dumped me for Edward and I was heartbroken, because I thought I knew what love was and that he couldn't possibly love her the way I loved her and she obviously was confused…" I trailed off at my own epiphany.

"Is this going to get better for me soon?" she asked in a calm but controlled voice while she shook my hand to bring me back to her. I nodded my head.

"Yes. When I met you it was all different, Ness. I didn't want to kiss you because I was curious about kissing. I wanted to kiss you because if I didn't I would regret it for the rest of my life. I wanted to get to know you because _not_ doing so seemed like the single most idiotic notion every conceived. I had to be near you. I had to touch you. God, I sound like a fucking psycho stalker." I was fucking this up.

But I wasn't. Those hazel eyes softened and that beautiful caramel colored nose nuzzled mine. Then she kissed me.

"No you don't. I had the same feeling about you." Nessie slid down my lap and wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged me close for what seemed like an eternity. She laid her head on my shoulder and I played with the braids that hung down her back. My heart almost exploded. I don't think she was aware of the gift she'd just given me. Without even realizing it, she basically told me that I wasn't alone in my feelings. This was so much more than I had ever had. It was so much better. For the time, there was no nookie; there was no funny business. We were just happy and content to sit and think about things. She finally picked her head up and cast those hazel eyes on me again.

"So what I hear you saying," Ness said in her best analyst voice, "is that your physical relationship with Bella was done out of adolescent curiosity, but with me it's something more. Is that correct?" We'd watched a few episodes of Dr. Phil together and made fun of the way Dr. Phil always restated what he perceived the true issue to be.

"Yes," I answered while I pulled her lips back to mine, "and that," kiss, "there is no need," kiss, "to be jealous of her at all," kiss, "ever." Long kiss. This girl knows her shit. She didn't talk about her past, I know it was some serious shit—it's one of the reasons she's here—but that girl can use her tongue. I wondered what else she was good at. I knew that strawberry was my new favorite flavor.

"But you're still best friends?" she asked while I moved my lips down her neck. I wasn't going to mark her though. I needed more proof that her skin wasn't actually caramel, because it looked good enough to eat.

"When Edward, the overbearing prick-wad allows her to talk to people other than him." My hands found the soft skin on her back under her peasant shirt. Her back arched with pleasure. She was graceful like a dancer as she sighed and moved under my palms.

"How does this feel different?" she breathed out. She was enjoying the direction my hands had taken.

"I just can't get enough of you," I buried my face in the crook of her neck as she wrapped her arms around my neck and her fingers wound in my hair, "but just this could be enough, too." Again we just sat for an immeasurable moment. I couldn't bring myself to tell her I loved her and fuck everything up again.

"I won't get jealous," she sighed contentedly. "I know your heart is true and you would never do anything to hurt me." I just held on to her for a while longer. She was so special. She just fell into my life less than a month ago. Everyone was shit-eating jealous that I snagged her so quickly. But it was like I told her, I had little choice. Destiny is a powerful force.

"I won't give you any reason to doubt me," was all I could manage to return. I felt so much and was trying to control it.

The bonfire was kicking. Sam and Paul did an excellent job getting everything set up and hopping. Their girlfriends, Emily and Leah, took care of the food. Leah'd dated Sam for years and there was a big blow up when he suddenly eloped with her cousin Emily one weekend. No one talked about it. But since Leah hooked up with Paul, things were much more civilized at tribal functions. Leah had an unknown power over Paul that even he couldn't explain. I think I was beginning to understand how he felt.

Our talk this afternoon seemed to bring Nessie and me even closer. We'd only gotten to second base before we decided we needed to head to the beach, but neither one of us could keep our hands off each other the rest of the evening. She was either sitting on my lap, or leaning on my shoulder, or I had my arm around her.

"Hey Black," Quil taunted from the log next to us, "I see Nessie's been marking her territory." He pointed to the red mark on my neck. I bet the fucker was just jealous.

"I thought it'd be the only way I could keep you away from him," Nessie said without batting an eyelash. The whole pack of guys roared at her quip and Quil muttered something under his breath. Don't mess with my chica, she can definitely hold her own.

Bella and Edward showed up right before the tribal bard, Ted Nightsong, began the histories and I could see Edward making furtive glances at my girl. He was perched on a log right behind Bella who was sitting at Billy's knee. She always sat there because she liked his commentary, and she stared intently into the fire. She was dressed in some outfit you would see people who were pretending to go to the beach wearing in a magazine. She obviously hadn't picked it out, because she wasn't wearing her converse. I only noticed because she looked uncomfortable. She had never been uncomfortable down here on the rez. I didn't like that she had to pretend so much for him.

I turned my attention back to Nessie who was also paying rapt attention. Part of her assignment was to compare and contrast the history of different tribes in the Pacific Northwest. She could always ask dad to repeat any of the details, but she'd said there was nothing like hearing Nightsong's tale the way he was trained to tell it. I just held her close and watched her absorb it all.

We were roasting s'mores after the tales were told when Bella and Edward finally approached us. They arrived too late to make introductions before and I thought it best for the uptight prick to approach us on his own terms.

"Hey Jake," Bella said with a warm smile but with worried eyes, "thanks for inviting us." She gave me a short and distant hug. I appreciated that seeing as I told Nessie earlier I wouldn't give her any reason to doubt me.

"Not at all, Bells," I returned. "You know you're always welcome here. You Swans are part of the tribe." I didn't include Edward, but I did look at him. "Bells, Edward, I want you to meet Renesmee." I peered over at her as she stepped forward. Edward spoke first.

"Renesmee," he said, "what an interesting name." She just peered at him for a moment, trying to figure out what he meant by that. I could see her sizing him up but it was hidden by a little smirk.

"Yes," she responded, "most people call me Nessie." She looked over at Bella and her smile widened. "Bella, it is a pleasure to meet you. Jake speaks very highly of you." She pulled Bells into a hug who, just a little surprised, hugged her back. Over Nessie's shoulder I could see Bella smiling at me. It was an approving smile and sort of a quick 'way to go'. This made me happy. Bella was happy for me and I could feel it through her gaze. Edward's hold on her couldn't stop the magic of our friendship and our ability to communicate without actually talking.

"It's nice to meet you too," Bella said when Ness finally released her. "Jake was so excited when we agreed to come and I figured you must be something special." Nessie melted into my side as my arm snaked around her waist. She towered over Bella's petite little frame, but she was still a good six inches shorter than me. She'd wrapped herself up in one of my hoodies after the sun went down and I could still feel her shivering next to me. "You're an exchange student I hear," Bella continued.

"Yes," she looked over at me. She quirked an eyebrow that said, _good boy, you have talked about me to her. _I hoped that earned me a few brownie points. I could think of quite a few exceptional things Ness could do to show her appreciation too.

"I told her a little bit about you. I was excited to share." I wanted to kiss her so badly, but I didn't think it was appropriate. Edward already looked like something rotten had been rubbed under his nose.

"Well, I've basically finished my high school credits, but I get some dual college credits if I keep a comparative journal on tribal customs in this area. La Push has a great collection in its library and has easy access to a number of other reservations while being remote enough to give me a feel for true reservation life." My girl was talking shop. I knew Bella could keep up. If she wasn't so fucking pale, most people would think she was Quileute because she's spent so much time here her whole life.

"So did you find any comparisons?" Bella asked truly interested.

"Well, where I come from in Oneida, we have a legends explaining how our clans were chosen. Our people are matrilineal so it's passed through the women and I'm of the wolf clan," my girl blushed and her eyes darted towards me. "So I found the story of the spirit warriors fascinating. I'm going to have to do about three blog entries just to do all my thoughts justice. I'm so excited," she gushed.

My heart flipped a little when she said she was from the wolf clan. It was like we were _made_ for each other. Like custom-crafted and shit. It almost made me believe in the old imprinting legends. I winked at her and turned my attention back to Edward who was shuffling is feet like he had somewhere better to be.

"So, Edward," I tried to make conversation while the girls were talking about things that appeared to bore him, "what'd you think of the stories?" He stopped shuffling his feet.

"I actually found them very interesting. It explains all the wood carvings of wolves in all your old buildings downtown," he said.

"When have you been in the ceremonial buildings?" I was shocked. Most palefaces, and Edward was indeed very pale, had never had been too interested to go into those places. They come to La Push for the beach or the bars. Plus, it was mainly used for council meeting and the free yearly health examinations.

"My dad was called out do tend to some of your elders when we first moved here. I was just assisting him," he looked over at Bella who was talking animatedly to Nessie. "It was actually the first time I ever laid eyes on Bella. I watched you two walk across the street from the upstairs window of the main building." His eyes stayed on her and he didn't look back at me. So fucking weird; that was fucking creepy as shit. I didn't want Bella back as a girlfriend, but I was concerned about her as my friend.

I felt Nessie's hand slide up my chest and rest over my heart. She just patted it a few times and kept talking to Bella like nothing had happened. She must have felt me tense beside her and she was reassuring me. I'd known this girl for a month and she already knew me as well as Bella did. Better.

"Well, Bella and I were just coming over to tell you thank you for inviting us and that we were headed out in a few minutes," Edward said with a tight smile. I watched his eyes finally move from Bella to Nessie's hand on my heart, up to the mark on my neck, and then come to rest on my face. Bella cleared her throat. We all looked at her.

"No," Bella corrected, "we were going to go talk to the Clearwaters and then Billy again."

Oh, shit. Edward was in trouble. She had her stubborn I'm-not-taking-your-shit look on her face. But Edward looked at her like she was a stranger.

"But Bella, we agreed that it would be rude to leave Emmett and Jasper alone at my house for much longer," his tone was pleading and just a little whiny. How did she stand his shit?

"Emmett McCarthy?" I asked. There weren't many people with that name and Emmett was the shit. I loved hanging out with that dude. Charlie brought him down after he had gotten in some trouble up in Forks and we'd worked on some cars together. He'd done me a solid by taking over the care and maintenance of Charlie's cruiser.

"Yeah. Why?" Edward's tone was just a little condescending.

"I know Emmett. He's the shit!" I said. "Love that guy! Tell him I say hi." The look on Edward's face was priceless. It's like he wanted to believe me but just couldn't.

"Emmett and Jazz will be fine at your house. I told you that this is an annual affair that I haven't missed my entire life. I thought _we_ decided that _we_ could stay a bit longer." Bella's tone was sarcastic. Edward clearly had not seen this side of Bella or he didn't know how to handle her. I felt just a little sorry for the guy.

No I didn't.

"Can I talk to you privately for a moment," Edward asked Bella in a loud whisper. What a fucking douche bag.

"Bella, why don't you take him to our log? That's far enough away from prying eyes and ears," I suggested. I don't know how Edward took that—me calling it _our_ log—but I wanted him to stew on it. Bella nodded her head, grabbed Edward's hand, and literally dragged him off into the darkness.

"What a fucking douchebag," Nessie said. God, I loved her even more. "I get it. Bella I like—him not so much." I tilted my head down and just kissed her hard.

"You I like. And yes, he's a major douchebag," I said when our lips separated with a smack.

"Have you ever taken me to _the_ log?" Nessie asked with a smile. I grabbed her hand and pulled her in the same direction Bella and Edward walked. The beach was a big place with many places to go. I wanted to show her how much I appreciated her.

"No. Because I am _not_ a douchebag. Who takes his _new_ girlfriend to the special place of his old girlfriend?" I knew there were some spots on the beach on the way to _the_ log that were shrouded by large rocks. I thought maybe I could get close to third base on the same day I make it to second.

"I'm glad you think that way," she said wrapping both her arms around my waist as we walked. "You're my Thunder Boy," she said almost too quiet for me to hear over the thunder of the surf.

"Your what?" I asked her. She smiled to herself and seemed to make a decision. She let go of my waist, stood up straight and gathered my hands into hers. She was only a few inches shorter than me so gazing into those beautiful eyes of hers with the moon shining off them and shit—well it just blew me away.

"Our people have a legend about a girl who was taken up in a mist to the land of the Thunder people. The son of the chief fell in love with her one day while they were all working in a field. While she was there, she lived happily with him and among his people." Her hand came up and cradled my cheek and her eyes were filled with such sincerity. "And even though she missed her family, she stayed with him for a year because she loved him, too." My heart thudded in my chest. Had this beautiful, amazing woman just told me that she loved me? She had. She basically said it first.

"Oh, Ness," I breathed out. We'd reached a little outcropping of large boulders. The full moon gave me enough light to see that she was a little embarrassed by her declaration.

"I'm sorry if that was a little sudden," she mumbled. I lifted her chin to look at me. She still smelled of strawberries; she always smelled of strawberries. It was another part of her culture and heritage. The moon illuminated her big eyes and our lips were an inch apart.

"It was sudden, but the feeling is mutual, Ness." I hadn't planned saying it so soon, but she did it first. "I'm so in love with you." Her eyes flitted between my eyes and my lips and they were filled with relief.

"God I love you, too." And my lips sealed her declaration as I inhaled the breath that carried it.

Before long we were hidden from view and I had her slim, toned body pressed up against a large smooth rock. The electricity that had been building all night through our small touches sparked with each kiss, brush of a tongue, and grinding hips. We hadn't been at it too long, two wanting bodies pressed together with nothing more than some thin cotton between us, when we heard Bella's voice coming towards us.

"Forget it Edward. I think we need some time apart."

Nessie and I peeked out from our secluded spot. We needed to catch our breath anyway. "What do we do?" Nessie whispered. It felt wrong to watch this private moment, but I was glad to see my friend sticking up for herself. Nessie just gazed back towards Bells and Edward and pounding of the surf did little to conceal their words. My silence was her answer and we both just waited in the shadows.

"What are you talking about? It's being here, isn't it? It's being around _him_? You always get so defiant when you're around him. That why I hate it so much," he admitted.

"Edward, that is who I am." Bella's shoulders sagged in defeat. "I have my own thoughts and feelings and all being around Jacob does is make me remember that."

"Bella, what are you talking about? I listen to your thoughts and feelings," he said to her like she was a five year old. Edward's arms were outstretched and pleading her to join with them. It kind of made me sick. But Bells was holding her own.

"No, Edward. You want me to say what _you_ want to hear. You don't know what _I_ really think." She shook her head as if finally deciding something. "I can't do this anymore. I can't pretend to be something I'm not. It's so exhausting. It's killing me," she whimpered in a defeated voice.

"Bella," he stepped towards her, "I just want you to be _you_."

"No Edward, you don't. The condition for coming here tonight was that Alice had to dress me." She gestured to her clothes. "This is not me. Everyone on this beach tonight knew that. You won't even let me eat the food I like, Edward. You don't want _me_. You want me to fit the picture you have in your head." Her hand flew up and tapped against her head to illustrate her point. "I've been so dazzled by you and your infatuation with me, I've changed into what I thought you wanted me to be. But I'm not a mind reader and I can't do it anymore."

Again, Edward reached out to her and she backed away from his touch. It was like she was scared of it. Not like, he'd hurt her and shit, but like he'd suck her in. She was crying and she almost looked broken.

"Bella…" Edward began but trailed off, not knowing how to respond to that. It looked like she hit the nail on the head and Edward knew it.

"Edward, you go on home. I'll just ride home with my dad or one of the guys will take me." She sat down in the sand and he took one more step towards her.

"Are you sure that's safe?" Edward asked. That seemed to be the last straw for her. Bella stood up, squared her shoulders and spoke in a voice I had only heard on a very few and special occasions. She. Was. Pissed.

"Is what safe, Edward? Riding home with my father who the chief of police? Being in a car with people I've known since birth?" Edward's mouth opened and then shut again. "What's not safe, Edward, is this…this…thing we have, where I'm too afraid to say or do anything wrong. I. Am. Tired, Edward. So, so tired. I need a break. From you." She wiped a tear from her eye. "I love you with all my heart. But you've taken everything I have and expected more. I don't have anything left," Bella's voice was a broken croak when she finished and she just turned around and headed back to the log.

A tendon in Edward's neck had been pulsing through most of Bella's break up. He watched her walk away and then turned and walked in the other direction towards the bonfire. The prick wasn't even going to find out if she was okay.

"Ness…" I looked over at her. She looked just as shocked as I felt.

"Go, Jake. She needs you," her hazel eyes were clear and bright. They were pained as well.

"Ness, I can't if you think—"

"Jake, I think you need to help that woman who just found her backbone by ripping out her own heart. Go to your friend. I'll go hang out with Seth." She smirked at me. We both knew Seth had a big crush on her.

"What did I do to deserve you?" I asked and then kissed her sweetly.

"You rumbled, my Thunder Boy."

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><p><strong>AN: So, what do you think of Jake? Ness? Bella? Who gave two cheers? Who thinks Eddie needs to pull his head out of his ass?  
><strong>

**Leave me some love.**

**Next up: Emmett **


	4. Chapter 4 Emmett

**A/N: I love writing Emmett. I hope you enjoy my version of him.**

**As always, thanks to MarinaNamaste for the beta. **

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><p>"Rosie, I get it," I beat the punching bag with my fist that wasn't holding the phone. I hated her father. The fucker was such a fucking god damned asshole. Didn't he know she didn't want to date the sons of his business associates? Didn't he realize he was basically selling his daughter like a prostitute? Except Rose didn't have sex with them.<p>

"You should probably spend the evening with Edward anyway," her voice was actually peppered with a little concern. "Alice has given up on him until he can be nice and Jasper only does what Alice does. I'm actually worried about the prick. His hair is more fucked up than usual."

And I knew that as much understanding Rose was going to show Edward.

"I understand how Alice feels. I'm about to throw him off a cliff myself. I was going to La Push tonight to hang out with Jake, actually, and give myself a break. I was hoping you'd come along so we could double. He's rarely without Renesmee these days. I think you'd like her. She's as straight forward as you are."

"I wish I could. I've always thought Jake was a bit immature, but I'd much rather be down there with you than in Port Angeles with Royce King, ruler of the Assholes." This will be the third date with this guy and her father keeps pushing him on her. "Emmett, I'm so sorry," her voice cracked.

"Hey, babe, don't you worry. When I see you next I'ma make you forget all about the Asshole King. What kind of name is Royce, anyway? He sounds like a fucking poser."

"He is. And he's uber creepy, she said as I grabbed a towel and wiped my face. "How are you going to make me forget?" Rosalie's voice dropped into that sexy voice that made me instantly hard. God, I wanted that woman. I didn't quite understand her hesitation, but I loved her so much, that while just being with her was enough even if it drove me crazy. I took a lot of showers though. Lots and lots of showers. I looked at the towel in my hand and dropped next to my bed in case I needed it later tonight for another…ah…release.

"Baby, I could do things to you that would make you forget your own name," I growled into the phone. I could too. I'd been doing my reading. I was just waiting for the day she let me try out some techniques.

"Maybe I'll get home early enough for you to demonstrate a little bit. Like not forget my own name, but just some things…" her voice was gravely and I could hear a hint of a smile.

"Baby, you can't tease me like that. My balls are so blue I may just bust a nut if you tease me anymore," I ground out.

"Honey, I'm not teasing you. Maybe we can find something to do to relieve some pressure but not relieve me of my V-card."

"Oh, I have some ideas that can fit into those parameters." I'd had a glimpse of her perfect breasts last week and I wanted more. I'd had my lips on them for about ten seconds before we were interrupted by Alice and her anger with Edward. I'd dreamed about them every night since and brushed against them as many times as Rosalie would let me in broad daylight. Fucking Alice. Fucking Edward. He'd been sulking for over two weeks since Bella dumped him and he finally wore Alice's nerves thin.

"Good. I'll call you as soon as I'm home." I think she giggled. Fuck me, she was serious. I stroked myself just to get my damn dick to settle down. Shit. "You're really going to La Push?"

"Yeah. Edward wants to stew, so I'm going to let him," I exhaled heavily. "You're right when you say he can be a moody bastard."

"Okay, can you just go by and check on him, though?" Rose asked. She sounded annoyed—like she was annoyed that she cared. I think she was annoyed that she cared.

"Yeah, I'll stop over on my way out of town. How's Bella doing? Do you care about her as much?" I asked through a chuckle.

"She's a mess, but I'm actually pretty impressed with her. Alice says she spends a lot of time in La Push, but she hangs out with Alice when she wants to give Jake and his Scottish monster some alone time," she answered.

"Scottish monster?" I didn't follow.

"Nessie. Like the Loch Ness monster?" she asked like it was obvious. "You gotta admit, that's a funky ass name." I laughed. I didn't think I'd bring that up while I was down there.

"Okay, I'm going to head on over to see Ed. Can you leave early so we can begin our exploration?" I begged. I adjusted my boner which was still rock hard.

"I'll try, baby," she paused for a moment, "I love you so much. I promise I'll tell him it's the last date tonight. And then I'll stand up to my father," she whispered. I didn't know what to say. I knew how dangerous it was to stand up to her father. He'd disowned her sister a few years ago and Rosalie was scared to death to lose her father. Her mother'd died a few years ago of cancer.

"I already know how you feel about me, Rosie. I don't want you to mess things up with your dad because you feel bad about this," I tried to reassure her.

"No. I need to stand up to both of them or I am no better than Bella used to be. I don't like being a hypocrite. Besides, maybe Royce'd like Lauren or Jessica. I need to figure out some way to introduce him to one of them," she laughed a little bit. She was trying to cover her anxieties.

"You do what you need to do. I'll help in any way I can. You know that, right?" I asked.

"Yep. It's the only way I get through these nights. Love you. I'll talk to you soon."

"Okay, Beautiful. Soon. And not so much talking," I growled again. She giggled.

I had to go take a shower. I don't know why people talk about cold showers. They don't help. A good hot shower with some slippery soap is the best cure for a raging boner I know of.

"Edward, where the fuck are you, man?" I was out back in the pool house that served as our game room. He'd been holed up in here for two weeks. He came out to go to school for the first week and that's about it. Then I don't think he'd come out at all.

"What do you want?" Edward mumbled from the couch.

"To check on you, mother-fucker. You've got the whole fucking world worried about you," I said.

"Why must you exaggerate so much? The whole world cannot be worried about me because I don't know the whole world," he moaned. I walked around the couch and saw all the empty food containers on the coffee table and the floor. He stunk like Mike Newton's ass after we force fed him a whole gallon of ice cream when we found out he was lactose intolerant. That was some funny shit, but it stunk.

"Why do you have to take everything so fucking literally? Rosie is worried about you and that's my whole fucking world so there."

"So thanks for rubbing my face in the fact that you still have your girlfriend while mine couldn't care less about me," he grumbled.

"How the hell would you fucking know? You haven't been to school in a week. She's a wreck. Do you think laying around here feeling sorry for yourself is going to win her back?" I asked. "You do want her back, don't you?" I boomed. He just needed some tough love.

"She said we needed some time apart. She said that she was tired of me. She said…"

"You've told me what she fucking said— more than once. So quit being an overbearing prick and let her order for herself. Let go, Edward. Let Bella be _Bella_," I suggested. "And take a fucking shower."

"Go away," he whined.

"I am. I just thought I'd see if you were still alive. I wish you were."

"Go on out with Rosalie. She's probably reveling in my misery, isn't she?"

And that was the last straw. I stomped over and picked him up by the front of his shirt.

"I just told you that she was worried about you. You say what you want about me, but don't you bad mouth my girl. Rosalie may be bitchy sometimes, but she cares deeply about people—even those she doesn't like; like you— you self-absorbed prick." He flinched at my words and my rough treatment. "Now, you know I love you like a brother, and I've spent a lot of time sticking up for your uptight-ass. Don't make all my words into lies," I warned. I let go of his shirt and he slumped down and just looked at the floor. "Now, I'm going to hang out in La Push tonight. I hope that I can come back here sometime soon, because I miss my friend."

"Great, another person choosing Jake over me," he said as I reached the door.

"If I remember correctly, she dumped that kid to be with you. And you just told me to leave. You're confused man. You better find someone soon and talk some of this shit out." I grabbed the doorknob and pulled the door open. "She's not with Jake, by the way. He has a girlfriend." He just stood there still staring at the floor. "And I mean it, take a shower, man. You reek."

And I left.

"So let me get this straight," Nessie said, "her dad doesn't like you and forces her to go on dates with the sons of his business associates?" I nodded. "What year does he think this is?" I shrugged. "And you're okay with this?" she asked.

"Fuck no! But what am I going to do? She doesn't like it. She doesn't…you know…_do_ anything with these guys. And she's trying to keep the one parent she has left from disowning her. I love her too much to let her go over something that isn't in her control. And I trust her to tell me if things get out of hand."

"Ness," Jake called from the other side of the garage where he was putting some tools away, "lay off him for a bit. This shit bothers him more than he lets on." I glanced over at him. He'd been through something similar with Bella. He'd know.

"How is Bella?" I asked.

"She's a mess," Jacob said walking over to pull Nessie into a hug. "Ness tries to help her, but we think Alice is better for her."

"Seeing us together only makes her sad," Nessie admitted biting her lip.

"Does she want you back?" I asked Jake, but hazarded a glance at Nessie.

"No, she wants Edward. But she wants to be herself, too," he answered.

"Which isn't too much to ask," Ness said. "I know he's your friend, Emmett, but has he always been that controlling? What is up with that?"

I didn't know. I hadn't known him long before he started dating Bella. And I did think it was weird the way he did everything for her. But I thought she liked it. It was only okay with me when I thought she liked it.

"I don't know why he's like that and I told him tonight he better find someone to talk to about all this shit. He's pretty fucked up right now. I really think he loves her—I think he's just scared."

"Scared of what?" Jake and Ness said together. That was sort of cute—and sickening, too.

"Of losing her," I said. "Of it not being…perfect. Eddie is an idealist and I think reality gets him down sometimes."

"Well the reality is that he lost her in his pursuit of perfection," Nessie assessed. "He better reevaluate."

"I know," I agreed. Nessie had really grown on me in the past few weeks. She was tall, which suited Jake's hulking frame—she didn't look dwarfed next to him. And her darn native skin offset all the crazy red hair she had. Rosie would call it auburn. If she and Jake had kids they'd be all lips and hair, that's for sure. They'd make pretty babies.

"How's Charlie's cruiser? You got all that sorted out?" Jake asked subtly changing the topic.

"Yeah. It's purring like a kitten. Thanks man for teachin' me all this shit. And gettin' me in good with the local authorities. I was fuckin' up real bad there for a while."

"Emmett?" Nessie asked through a smile. "You're a bad boy?"

"Used to be," I smirked at her. "I didn't have what Rose would call 'creative outlets' for all my energy and it got me into trouble."

"Like what?" Nessie had an evil glint in her eye.

"I don't really like talking about it. It's not something I like to brag about. But there was some fighting, public intoxication, and one car theft."

"Shit," Nessie said, "you're only eighteen."

"But his records will be sealed because he was a juvenile and that will work in his favor," Rosalie's voice came from the garage door.

"ROSE!" I yelped. I was to her in six steps, picking her up and swinging her around and around. "You made it and it's still so early." Remembering her conversation from earlier and the way her body was pressed against mine, made me instantly hard. Now all I wanted to do was get her alone and practice some technique. But she needed to be introduced to Nessie. I set her down on her feet and planted a kiss on her lips. When I pulled away she was smiling.

"I missed you. And Royce now knows, without a doubt, that you and I are exclusive and he and I are not going out again," she breathed. She kissed me again lightly. She did take a stand. My woman had cajones. I was worried about the fallout with her dad, but all I wanted to do right now was show her my appreciation. My hand wound in her hair and I kissed her back. But, there were two other people in the room, I guess I should introduce her to the one Rose didn't know yet.

"Rose, you know Jake, but this is Renesmee." I gestured towards the tall, dark woman. She really was a good fit for Jake. They looked much better suited for each other than he and Bella ever did. And, don't get me wrong, I like Bella and all, but Jake is so fucking outgoing and Bella is so…not. Nessie was just better for him.

"You are as gorgeous as Emmett described you," Rosie smiled at her. "But he calls you Nessie. Is that right?"

"Yes," Nessie blushed, "it started a long time ago, and I won't bore you with the story, but everyone calls me Ness or Nessie. And, you are even more gorgeous than Jake described you." Nessie punched Jake in the arm who feigned being hurt.

"Come on, Nessie," he pulled her into a close hug, "you know I only have eyes for you." He kissed her lightly. I wasn't about to be out done. I had a gorgeous blonde in my arms so I pulled Rosie back in and kissed her again. I'd missed her so much all night long. It seemed a little weird to be making out with another couple doing the same thing, not ten feet away, but none of us seemed to care at that moment. The smacking of lips and deepened breathes filled the garage for a few minutes.

"Jacob," Billy's voice boomed from up the hill, "I want to see that girl of yours for a little while." Damn that man had a set of lungs.

"Fuck me," Jacob breathed and we all chuckled. I hadn't let Rose go and she didn't seem to mind.

"Come on, I want to see Petty anyway," Nessie giggled when Jake's hands slid down to her ass and squeezed it.

"Who's Petty?" Rose asked in between my kisses.

"NASCAR driver. Jake, stop!" Nessie squealed as his hands moved up her stomach and just under her tits. "Billy's an unrepentant speed demon in that chair." She inhaled sharply as Jake nibbled her neck with his hand right in between her boobs and the other still on her ass. "Jake!" she blushed again but giggled showing she was enjoying his playfulness. I could never see Bella being that out of control. Ever. I was happy for him.

Jake clearly was comfortable with the physical side of his relationship and he was so open about his family, too. It sucked that his mother had died when he was young, but he seemed to have a really good relationship with his dad. I envied him for that. I wished I could take people home and just hang out with them with no fear of someone coming home in a drunken stupor. My mom hitting on Edward was about the last straw. He was a really good sport about that. We've been best friends ever since.

"Coming!" Jake called as he bent Nessie over backwards and kissed her deeply one more time. He straightened his girl back up on her feet and looked over at my girl. "Thanks for showing up. I was feeling a little frisky and didn't know how to get rid of him." He pointed at me and grinned that smile I'm sure made girls throw him their undies. "You showing up gave me an out." Rosie just smiled back pressing into my boner that would have been embarrassing if she hadn't been obstructing the view.

"Anytime," Rosalie said. "I think I'll be available a little more often now. We should all go out sometime."

"Definitely," Nessie said, "I think I like you already, Rose." She hit Jake on the ass and tried to scoot him out of the garage. "Let's go. I want to talk to that old buzzard."

"You don't mind?" Jake asked. "You can come on up," he offered to us.

"Nope," Rosalie said. "Thanks, but I have some things to ah…discuss with Emmett if you don't mind." Then I felt her hand on my ass. Holy fuck, Rosalie just grabbed my ass. I pressed into her this time showing her how much I enjoyed that.

"We'll make some noise on our way back down," Jake chuckled and swatted at Nessie's ass again but he missed when she ran ahead of him. We could hear them squawk and squeal all the way up the hill to the little, red house that I loved so much. I knew he hated it, but it was charming and it had a homey, lived-in feel.

Rosalie's hands were already under my shirt and she was trying to lift it over my head. I helped her out a bit by tugging it off and throwing it on the hood of the car. We stumbled to the back wall onto the couch that was actually concealed by the newest car Jake was working on. I could see that couch was strategically placed to be hidden from view and I was sure it saw quite a bit of action.

"I haven't able to get you out of my mind all night," Rosie breathed and then her tongue found mine. With Rose sitting astride my lap my fingers made quick work of each button on her fitted blouse while her hands stroked my shoulders, biceps, and pecs. She helped me relieve her of her shirt and I just stared for a moment at the perfect specimens of pure femininity right before my eyes. Rosalie's breasts were just perfect and beautifully contained inside dark blue lace. They were better than what I remembered all week long.

"Ho-ly fuck," I whispered in awe. They weren't the first pair of tits I'd seen before, nor were they the first pair I'd touched. But they were Rose's and she was letting me see and feel her. This was a big deal for her—and for me.

"Like what you see?" she leaned forward and whispered in my ear.

"Fuck yeah. Rosie, what's gotten into you?" I let my hands drag up those creamy white mounds not wasting any time. I'd learned my lesson last week and I wasn't going to turn down the gift she offered. "Not that I'm complaining." My thumbs circled around her lace covered nipples and I was rewarded with a glorious moan. Her arms reached behind her back and the lace fell into my lap. She held onto the back of my head as I kissed down her neck, licked across each swell, and sucked her little budding nipples to my heart's delight. She seemed to be enjoying boobie fun-time as much as I was.

It wasn't hard to recline Rose back on that brown plaid couch. She seemed to enjoy my weight pressing her down as my mouth worked its magic up and down her throat—my hand still busy with her dirty pillows. I felt my nuts tighten and realized that our hips had found a nice rhythm and she seemed to like right where my dick was rubbing against her cooch. I realized it wouldn't take much more of this before I had a mess in my pants.

"Emmett," Rose moaned, "touch me. Make me finish, please."

"Oh, Rosie, I'll do you better than that." I'd wanted to taste her since I read that article on the _Secret Techniques of Cunning-linguists_. Both Rosie and Edward were trying to get me to read more. I was sure Rose would be happy with my clitature selection.

I slowly let my lips blaze a trail below her tits, to which I gave more attention, and all over her tight, flat stomach. I teased her belly-button with my tongue while my fingers played with the waistband of her leggings. When her hips bucked up, I slid her bottoms down, leaving her completely naked on the ugly old 80's couch. My thumb found her little pearl and I watched her eyes widen with pleasure. She was staring back at me as I slid my finger into her hot pocket. It was, after all, my favorite food.

"Rosie, you are so ready for me," I breathed out pumping my finger in and out of her wetness. Damn that was sexy. I lowered my face to inhale her scent. She smelled like her normal rosemary and mint bath wash, but the musk of her arousal made me high. She spread her legs for me and I blew how air across her clit before I dipped my tongue in her small patch of dark blonde curls. I felt it harden against my tongue while a low sultry moan escaped her perfect red lips.

"Emmett!" she called, "Please!" It was Rosie who convinced me that reading was the key to success and here was my proof. Whoever wrote that article knew what he was talking about. I followed every detail I could remember and it paid off. Feeling Rosie's walls clamp around my finger, and listening to her moans of pleasure as I continued to flick her clit with my tongue made me want to explore many of the other options he discussed. We had time though. I could tell when I looked past her perfect and heaving tits to her tired but satisfied face that she was going to let me try that again.

"Oh my god, Emmett," she panted, "why haven't we done that already?" I barked a laugh at her. She pulled my face back to hers to kiss her, but she stopped. "Is that what I smell like?" she asked, curiosity splashed across her face.

"That's heaven to me," I responded.

She leaned forward and sucked my bottom lip into her mouth and licked it. She did the same to the top lip and then my chin. "Mmmmm…," she breathed out. She was sucking her essence off me and that sexy shit about made me blow my load in my pants. I shifted a little bit to relieve the pressure.

"Oh, baby, you must be uncomfortable," she cooed as she sat up and I rolled onto my back.

"You have no idea," I smirked. Just seeing my girl completely naked, sitting on top of me with a post-orgasmic glow made my dick swell to the hardness of the Cullinan diamond. Her hands were already unbuttoning and unzipping my jeans and I groaned at the thought of what was about to happen here on the couch in the back of Jacob Black's garage. My dick sprang free and she gasped in delighted shock.

"Emmett, you're not wearing underwear!" she giggled. "Do you do that a lot?" I just grinned at her. I did free ball it a lot. Mom wasn't the best at doing laundry or even about buying detergent. I'd fucking do it myself if she'd remember to buy the soap.

"Damn that's hot," she whispered. She leaned down and kissed my neck. "Now all I'm going to be able to think about is how close to the surface you always are." Her hand found my length as she sat back up and with her heat so close it was two or three strokes before a hot stream of cum flew up in the air and landed on my chest. If Rose wasn't so hot, I'd be embarrassed by that short duration. But a seasoned porn star couldn't have held his load with my Rose perched on top of him like that.

"Shit!" she giggled as I grunted through the rest of my release. I'm glad she kept pumping, but she seemed fascinated by it. "I'm going to call you Old Faithful."

I was a mess and I didn't know what to use to clean up. It wasn't my house or garage and I didn't want to snoop. Rose was looking around, too and found a roll of paper towels shoved between the back of the couch and the wall.

"These were conveniently placed," she smiled and tore off a few sheets and began wiping the mess off her hands and my chest.

"Baby, you don't have to do that," I said a little disgusted for her. Then she did something that almost made me hard all over again. She leaned down and licked one of my nipples clean.

"Next time," she smirked, "it won't spray everywhere and we won't need paper towels."

Ho-ly Fuck. Holy shit! Was she just saying she was going to give me head next time? Holy shit!

"Really?" I squeaked. That sounded manly. But she seemed happy in the knowledge of what she did to me. For me. "There's going to be a next time?" I asked just to be sure.

"Definitely. You are very, very skilled," she commended. "And it's going to be very, very soon." We lay there for a few minutes, side by side, just reveling in the feel of skin and the afterglow our first orgasm together. I couldn't wait until I could come inside her. I wondered if she was thinking the same thing.

"Love you," I whispered and kissed her nose. She always seemed to like it when I kissed her nose.

"I love you, too." Her eyes were bright and clear and filled with sincere emotion. Her skin, her scent, her voice, her kisses—she was perfect. And she loved me. She made it known and took a stand.

We heard the door slam up at the house. I wondered if Jacob did that on purpose as his promised warning, and Rose and I did a mad scramble for our clothes and to put ourselves back together.

Jake and Ness were taking their time laughing and giggling their way down the hill. Rose and I decided, in loud whispers, that it would look more natural if we were actually sitting on the couch kissing when they came in. I thought it was a stellar plan. I'd still get to taste her and to touch her—which I was doing. The used paper towels had found their way to the trash can at the end of the couch where my head was when I came all over myself. I was sure this was by design.

"Hey you two, break it up. We gave you plenty of time," Jake said as he sat on the other end of the couch and pulled Nessie down on his lap.

"How's Billy?" I asked wrapping my arms around Rose who was now, sadly clothed, but perched happily on my lap.

The rest of the evening was filled with light small talk and some laughs, but something had changed between Rosalie and I. I thought what I felt for her was strong and deep already. I was wrong. We had just cemented our souls together in a way neither one of us could have imagined before. Who knew that one orgasm could do that? The way she clung to me told me that she felt it too. It was going to take a jackhammer to break us apart. And we hadn't even had sex. I was both excited and a little frightened at the prospect of our eventual union.

The drive home was quiet but comfortable. I felt like I had to say something, though.

"I hope you know how much I love you," I said as I rolled my head on the head rest to look at her. She smiled serenely at me and pulled our hands, which were entwined in her lap, up to her lips and kissed them.

"I feel the same." I looked back at the road. We were driving in a bubble of happiness. That's what my car felt like at that moment—a bubble of happiness. I didn't want it to end. And, _because_ I didn't want it to end, I had to get her home well before her curfew. Her curfew with me was different than with the _acceptable_ boys she dated. But I had her home a half hour early anyway.

I kissed her sweetly as I turned off the car. We just sat, parked in her drive way, the soft sound of the radio encapsulating us. The moon found a break in the clouds and illuminated her hair giving her a halo in its pale light.

"Love you. Call me when you wake up," I said running my hand over her silky locks. I don't know what she did to her hair to make is so soft, but I loved just running my fingers through it.

"I will," she whispered, "love you, too." She just sat gazing at me. She didn't want to leave either. Opening the door would burst our bubble of happiness. And we both knew she had to go tell her dad what she had told Royce.

I lifted our hand to my lips and copied her earlier motions. "Thank you, Rosalie Hale."

"For what, Em?" her voice heavy with curiosity.

"For giving me something you cherish so much," I said trying really hard not to cry like a pussy. I realized, all of a sudden, how much more tonight meant after waiting for so long. She wanted to be sure of us before she gave me a portion of that side of her. And it made all the difference. I didn't want to fuck it up.

"I haven't given it to you yet," she smirked.

"You gave me enough, Gorgeous. And I know what it means. I want you to know that. And I'll wait for the rest, until you're ready." I tried to convey with my eyes all the sincerity I felt.

"I know," she whispered, glassiness still making her eyes bright, "which is why you made the decision easy."

Her free hand found the door handle and she pulled it. The bubble didn't burst. Though, I did feel the vacancy when she finally climbed out of the car and walked up the front steps to her porch. She gave me one more glance back before she unlocked the door and closed it behind her.

I still had the memories, though. And a promise.

I needed another shower.

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><p><strong>Next up: Alice<strong>


	5. Chapter 5 Alice

**A/N: As always, thanks to MarinaNamaste for the beta. She's amazing. And a good friend.  
><strong>

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><p>"Wait Bella, what?" I moved my cell phone to the other ear. She caught me while I was organizing my closet and I really hadn't been paying too much attention to what she was actually saying. "You're where?"<p>

"Alice, I really need you to concentrate on me here," her voice was tired like it had sounded the entire three weeks since she'd dumped Edward. But she also sounded irritated. Bella rarely got irritated with me. She was about the only person who didn't use that tone with me after about five minutes—well, there was Jazz, but he didn't count.

"I'm sorry, Bella," I said and then sat on my bed. "I'm sitting down and not looking at anything or listening to anything but you. Did you just say you were in Florida?"

"Yeah, I did. But," she stuttered, "I'm not _in_ Florida yet, I'm at the airport waiting for my flight. My dad just dropped me off."

"Fudge," I gasped. This thing had really pushed her over the edge. Jazz sat next to me and put his hand on my shoulder. "Jazz can you give me a few minutes?" He nodded and smiled and ambled off to his room.

"Was that Jazz?" Bella asked. Like, who else would it be? But I guess she didn't want everyone knowing her business. That made sense to me.

"Yeah, be he's gone." I tried to use my soothing voice. I could tell she didn't care. No one seemed to mind if Jazz was around. "Bella, do you think that's the best idea? I mean, what about homework? What about Charlie?"

"Alice, I don't need a fucking guilt trip right now. I need someone to understand. I'm a fucking mess and I'm trying really hard to keep it together here." And Bella said _I_ could be dramatic. People break up with their boyfriends all the time I don't know why this was hard for the two of them.

I sighed. "Alright, Bella." Bella didn't normally cuss so I knew she was really upset. "I'm just trying to think ahead." It bugged me that no one seemed to get the big picture. Does that make sense? It's like I'm the only person who can see the potential problems with all the "brilliant" plans my friends came up with.

"I know, Alice. I'm sorry," she said. _There_ was my Bella. She was always quick to apologize. But, just, not to Edward this time. Makes me think he _really_ messed things up. Bella had a very high tolerance level for all of our crap. "I just have to get out of Forks before I fuck everyone else up, too. You're the only person I've told I'm leaving. Can you let anyone else who matters know?"

"Bella, I'll do whatever you need, but you haven't even told Jacob?" I was really paying attention now. She told that big brute everything. I used to be so jealous of him. Okay, I still was. She showed him a side the rest of us only guessed at. Since Edward, though, I've had more of Bella than Jake did. Until three weeks ago that is. Stupidhead.

"No," she sobbed. There was something really, really wrong. "Charlie will let him know." I didn't know how to respond to that. Other than that I was really glad that I didn't have to take care of that. Jake was a fun guy, but I was still really jealous of him. It just seemed so easy to be him. Does that make any sense? It was like, he didn't have to try and everyone just loved him. I mean, the guy was freaking hot, but looks aren't everything. Are they? And people just swarmed around him.

"Alice, he won't answer my calls. I've tried to apologize to him, but he won't pick up," Bella croaked.

"Jake?" I asked, confused. I lost her in my own train of thought. I heard her inhale to reset her patience.

"Are you even listening to me?" she asked. I deserved that one. "Edward, Alice. _Edward_. He won't answer my calls." Her voice was small. That made me feel bad. I knew she felt like no one ever listened to her and here I was when she needed me doing exactly what she feared most.

"You dumped him, Bella. And I actually agree with the reasons you did. While I admit I miss hanging out with the two of you together, you had some very valid points. Why do you want to call him?"

"Because I still love him. He didn't come to school for a week, Alice. Do you know how guilty I felt? And then when he did finally come back he completely ignored me. I hurt him and that was never my intention. I just needed some time to think. And now that I think I have some clarity he won't even pick up the phone to listen to me." She let out another sob and I could hear her sucking snot back up her nose. I hope she packed some Kleenex. "I can't stay here if he won't let me talk to him. I can't think straight. I'm too fucked up and I don't want to fuck things up with everyone else."

"Bella, what are you talking about? How would you mess things up with the rest of us?" I asked. Okay, it really wasn't like her to be this dramatic. Something was really wrong. I hadn't even seen that much of her since it happened because she was spending most of her time in Jake's garage. Rosalie had actually been down there a few times this week with Emmett. Apparently, it was like an open bar down there and they could drink whenever they wanted. And, I was determined to keep Jazz away from Jake before he poached all my friends. I saw this as Jake's fault, not Bella's.

"If I stay, I'll mess up with Jake," she finally admitted. She blew her nose. Good, maybe she'd stop sniffling for a while. "And I love him too much to fuck with him."

"Well, you used to do that with him a lot, Bella, if I remember right. Maybe," I was going tell her that maybe that would be a good idea again. But she interrupted me, which was kind of rude.

"NO! Alice, he's with Nessie. And I'm not in love with Jake. I'm in love with Edward. I'm jealous of her and him. I'm not jealous that Nessie has _him_, I'm jealous of what they have together." She blew her nose again. "I was beginning to figure out ways I could break them up and try to get him back. But that's not what I want. I want Edward. I want Edward and me to have the same kind of open and…and…fun relationship that they have." She snorted a big wad of snot and I almost gagged.

"Bella, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" I tried but she cut me off again.

"Alice, please, just let me get this out. Someone has to know what's going on in my head. I need someone to know why I'm leaving for a while so I know that someone has my back in the rumor mill." She was right, the poo was going to hit the rumor fan. I could almost hear the word pregnancy in the air.

"Okay, Bella. I'm sorry. I'm listening." She didn't sound crazy. She actually sounded very lucid.

"I want to apologize to Edward for hurting him. I want to be with him. But I'm messed up in the head right now. If I go to him now and see him like this, everything will go back the way it was and nothing will change. I can't do that either. I have to go somewhere and get my head straight," she said. It sounded like she'd quit crying. She blew her nose again, though.

"Okay, Bella. That makes sense. I get it. I'm not trying to get off topic now," which was my normal tactic when things got too heavy. I didn't like heavy. "Just hear me out, Bells. Are you sure hanging around Renee is the best thing for you right now? I mean, you need someone who is a bit…you know…constant. Does that make sense?" I asked. Renee was so flighty. It took Bella almost a year before she trusted anyone when she first moved back here in junior high.

"Alice, I've thought a lot about this. Charlie is great and steady and all those things that a good parent should be, but I'm too much like him. I love too hard and almost too much. I need some..." she searched for words, "…some levity. I need to get out of Forks and regroup."

"Okay, what about school? What can I do to help you there?" I asked. She was going. There was nothing I could do to change her mind. I should have known that from the beginning when she told me that Charlie had dropped her off at the airport. Why didn't I just pay attention to her the first time?

"Well, I've dropped all the courses I really don't need for graduation, but just filled my day. And the others I'll just turn my assignments in through email. Renee says she has a scanner for my math homework and actually Mr. Varner said there was some online stuff I could do for credit. Just as long as I pass the tests when I come back," Bella explained. She was done crying for the time and back into her information mode.

"So, how long before you come back?" I asked. I know I sounded sad. I was going to miss her. Rose and Emmett had hit some new stage in their relationship and there was no separating them right now and they liked to hang with Jake and Ness. Jasper and I could pose as a couple on double dates, but we didn't like being around a room full of couples making out. That was just—weird.

"Oh I'm not sure. Just a couple of weeks. A month tops. Phil is done with his season in a few weeks and Renee won't have much time for me after that," her voice dropped to melancholy again. I really hated her mother. I knew that I didn't always pay attention the way I should, but I was always there when Bella needed me. Renee disappointed her again and again… and again.

"Okay Bella. I'm just going to miss you. You know I worry about you." She took a deep breath again. "And I love you."

"I love you, too, Alice. Thank you for listening to me. Can you try to tell Edward if he ever wants to listen?" Bella's voice cracked. I didn't want her to start crying again.

"I will. I'll make him listen, but I'll do it when he's ready," I tried to reassure her.

"And," she sounded hesitant and I could hear them calling her flight in the background—I assumed it was hers because it was to Florida, "can you tell Rosalie thanks." I did _not_ expect that. I almost started laughing, but I contained myself.

"Sure. I can pass that along. Can I ask for what?" I hedged cautiously.

"She set me straight and I needed it. Tell her that I appreciate it now, even if I didn't then," she paused again. "Look Alice, I have to go. Ask Rosalie about it if you want."

Oh, I will honey. I will.

"Take care and call me if you need anything—even if it's just an ear you need," I gushed.

"I will. Thanks, Allie." And her phone went silent.

Well, I needed some info, stat. My fingers flew over my phone at inhuman speed.

"What's up, short stuff?" Rosalie's sultry voice filled my ear. Damn I wish I could sound like that. I was short, and squeaky and no one ever really took me very seriously.

"Why did Bella just tell me to thank you for setting her straight?" I spent the next few minutes explaining that Bella was going to be in Florida for a few weeks.

"Well, shit. She actually listened to me. I'm going to have to quit hating her. Well, that is if she actually changes," Rosalie said surprised.

"What happened? She said to ask you for the story," I snooped.

"Well, we were all hanging out in Jake's garage the other night," I rolled my eyes, "and it was like the second or third time we were all there. We really need to invite them up sometime," she got sidetracked, "you'll really like Nessie the more you get to know her." But that meant hanging out with Jake. "And I know how you feel about Jake, but that's only because you're not the center of attention. And Nessie really tones him down," she chuckled. "Or, keeps him busy."

"Just what Jazz and I need is to hang out with couples who have nothing better to do than make out. It's fine if you're a couple. Get back to the point," I was irritated now. I didn't like being single and Jazz made things easier, but I could tell it bugged him too when everyone was all...cozy. Does that make sense?

"Well, Bella's been hanging around a lot. Jake really is good for depressed people. I even find myself smiling around the disgusting douchebag," she was digressing again. But she had a point; he felt the need to share all his bodily gas.

"Rose!" I called.

"Well, it's true. Anyway, we were all hanging out a few times and I could see Bella giving Nessie that look. I know you know what look I mean because I give it to any girl who looks at Emmett for a second longer than is necessary," she admitted. And Rosie's look could make a grown man cry. "She didn't say anything to Nessie or Jake, that I could see, but I could see the jealously rolling off her in waves. I really need to get my nails done. You up for a manicure?" she asked. I looked at my nails too and they were pretty mangled.

"Yeah, I totally need one. I've had this color since homecoming. But, Rose, go on," I prodded.

"Oh yeah. So I totally pulled her up to use the bathroom in the Black's house—which is surprisingly clean for two single men living in one house. I wonder if Nessie cleans for them. Huh. I'll have to ask her."

"ROSE!" I was beginning to lose my patience with her. I didn't have that much to begin with.

"So I pulled her up to the main house to use the bathroom," I thought I could hear a smile in her voice—she loved drawing these things out for me, "and was all 'look Bella, I see you looking at Jake like you used to. He's with Ness now and he's finally over you. Don't fuck this up for him.' And she was all, 'that's not what I want at all' and I was all 'that not what you're acting like.'" Rose took a breath.

"Well," I interjected, "she heard you. She told me that she really doesn't want Jake…she wants what Jake and Ness have but with Edward."

"Damn," she said under her breath, "she's smart. Okay, I own Em twenty bucks."

"You took bets with Emmett?" I asked deciding that my next manicure color should be some shade of dark purple. Homecoming was total crap with Edward and Bella broken up by the way. I did look fabulous in my dress, though. Even if it did cover all my _best_ features.

"Emmett bets on everything. But _I'll_ bet I could talk him into some other form of repayment," she giggled. Rosalie actually giggled. Wow.

"So have you two done the deed or what? You have been acting rather…umm…satisfied…lately," I pried. Rose didn't like people who played kiss and tell. I didn't expect much info.

"No, we haven't. But since I told Royce to back off things have heated up a little," she crooned.

"Have you heard from that creep again?" I asked. She'd told me she'd seen him lurking from time to time. That was just weird since he wasn't from around here.

"No," her voice got quiet.

"Have you told Emmett that you've seen him around?" I pressed.

"Hell no! I don't want Em in jail for assault or murder. He might fix Chief Swan's car, but I don't think he'd overlook murder charges," Rose exclaimed. "Besides, it doesn't matter. My dad has kind of laid off a bit, too. I'm not going to rock the boat right now." There was a break her voice and that meant someone was calling her.

"You need to get that?" I asked before she could cut me off.

"Yeah, it's Em. Listen, let's do mani's Monday right after school, kay?" she asked. I had my dance lessons again tomorrow and there was no way I was going to get away from that. I didn't want to miss my chance to dance with him.

"Sounds like a plan," I chirped back. I needed to find Jasper. He didn't like being alone too long.

I headed down the hallway to his room and knocked softly on the door. It was open, but sometimes he was a little jumpy. He was sitting at his desk with his earphones on, so he didn't hear me knock anyway. His blonde curly hair was just a mess, but I loved it that way. It was stylish and unruly, does that make sense? It really reflected his personality, as well. But he was so quiet around most people, they'd never know.

He wasn't technically my brother, but he'd lived with us so long that it felt that way. His parents were killed in some gruesome way that my parents would never reveal to me and Jasper had witnessed the whole ordeal. He never talked about it either and I never, ever asked him. That was why we became so close. He once told me that being around me was just easy because I had a way of ignoring the bad stuff and focusing on the good stuff.

We didn't correct anyone's assumptions. Half the town thought we were twins, but couldn't figure out why we had different last names. The other half thought we dated and my father just kept a tight leash on both of us. They were right about the leash and the last names. I liked being known as the Wonder Twins, though. It suited us.

"Alice, being around you is like taking a happiness pill. I can't help but absorb your good vibes," he'd once told me when yet someone else mistook him for my boyfriend—or my brother. He said it a lot. He just liked being with me. And I liked being with him. It's why I was so conflicted about Riley.

Riley Biers.

Riley was in my dance class and he'd been making some not too subtle advances towards me. He'd offered to meet for extra practices and even to meet here in Forks if need be. He was so cute, too. No, he was gorgeous. And his body and the way he could move it. I wanted Riley the same way he wanted me. I could tell. I wasn't an idiot. But I acted like I was—for Jasper's sake.

Jazz turned in his chair as if he'd felt me standing behind him. He probably did. We had almost a psychic connection. I always knew when he was down and needed me and vice versa. Does that make sense? Those clear blue eyes looked up at me and he raised one eyebrow.

"Allie, what is it?" he asked. "You've been acting strange for a week now." He switched his game off and put his headphones down lightly on his desk. "And don't tell me it's this whole Edward and Bella thing because that's bullshit. It's always worse when you come home from dance too."

He always knew what I was feeling.

"I don't want to tell you. It might upset you," I said, being completely honest.

"Darlin' it's upsettin' me not knowin'," he said in his southern twang. He'd been watching a lot of old westerns lately with Edward. I wanted to tell him so bad. I did. Something wasn't real in my world if I hadn't told Jasper about it, does that make sense? I flitted over and climbed up on his bed and sat cross legged in the middle.

"I like someone," I finally said with my hands twisting in my lap.

"Finally!" he called as he raised his hands towards the ceiling as if he were thanking God.

"What do you mean, finally?" I asked, just a little shocked.

"Tink," he said in his normal voice calling me after the little green fairy, "I've known about your crush on this Riley guy for about a month now." My head jerked up and eyes found his. He was smirking at me with his shit-eating grin. "He actually came and asked me what the deal between us was."

"When? What'd you tell him?" I asked. Jazz had only driven with me a hand full of times to Port Angeles. My mom usually took me so she could keep tabs on the other dance moms.

"About two weeks ago and I told him you were my sister," he laughed. "He didn't believe me though. He said we didn't look anything alike. I told him I was adopted." The truth worked. I didn't know what to say. I was ecstatic that Riley asked about me, but I was scared what Jasper would think.

"And? What do you think?" I finally asked after pretending to look at my nails again.

"What do I think? I think you ought to go for it if he asks you out," Jasper said rising from the chair and sitting next to me on the bed. I looked up at him.

"I don't want to hurt you," I said. He knew what I meant. When Bella and Jake started all hot and heavy last year, Jasper and I had bumped around a conversation of "what ifs". We decided that we'd better not. We also discussed that we were just content to be Al and Jazz for a while and to let people wonder. But no one had caught either of our eyes until now. I didn't want to leave Jazz all high and dry.

"Alice Brandon, I am a big boy who needs to babysit my best friend Edward until he can pull his head out of his ass. If I know you're spending time with someone you liked, it'd take a load off," Jasper said as he pulled me into a playful headlock. "Besides, I'd feel worse if I knew you'd said no out of pity for me," he added. He let go of my head and looked into those baby blues again.

"I wouldn't—" he cut me off. Why was everyone doing that to me? Well, except Rose. I had to cut her off a few times.

"Alice, you would. And I love you for the thought. But I may have someone I'm interested in asking out, too. If you try, I'll try. How's that?" His smile was as rare as the sun in these parts and it transformed his face. I couldn't help but smile back and agree. Jasper wasn't an unhappy person, it's just that there were very few things that made him curve his lips up enough to show some teeth. "So tomorrow, when that boy pays more attention to you than any other person in the room, you work that Alice magic of yours and ask him out after class. I'll talk mom into letting you drive yourself. It shouldn't be hard on a Sunday," he said.

Jasper was right. There were more tabs for mom to keep track of at church on Sunday than at dance class on the same day. My mom was determined to be everywhere keeping track of everything. I hope Bella knew how lucky she was to have one who kept her nose out of her business. Okay, here is the one instance I envied Bella's situation. Her mom just didn't really care. There had to be a happy medium. Why couldn't our moms be more like Esme, Edward's mom?

"Okay," I agreed, throwing my arms around Jasper's neck. "You're the best brother ever!"

"Oh, I know it," he said laughing. He pointed at the place where my eyebrows pucker when I have a question to ask him. "What?"

"Who are you interested in? Do I know her?" I asked grinning. I wondered who had finally caught Jasper's interest. I hoped she was worth of him. Few people would be.

"Yeah, but she's a freshman. I'll tell you if you promise not to laugh," he said. I think I saw a tiny blush creep up his pale neck.

"I promise, you cradle robber," I bit out while holding in a laugh. Something irritated me though. I didn't know what it was, though. I blew it off.

"Bree Tanner," he said with his head dropped so I couldn't see his eyes. Bree was a pretty little thing who came to my dad's church services every now and then. I was told that I should fellowship her because she'd had a troubled past and needed some good friends. I liked her from the few times I'd spoken to her. I could see her being a good fit for Jazz. She was pretty and reserved. And if she said yes to my Jasper, I'd know she was smart and had good taste.

"I'm not going to laugh," I promised. "But you have to tell me _everything_."

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><p><strong>AN: Next up-Edward  
><strong>


	6. Chapter 6 Edward

**A/N: As always a shout out to MarinaNamaste who helps me round out my imagery and fix some of my typos. She's been a little snarky bint today, but what can you expect from someone who doesn't know what a breakfast taco is? Just sayin'. ;) Love you, M. **

**And here's Edward:**

* * *

><p>"You're such a prick, man. I can't believe you went out with Tanya!" I'd already heard Emmett's diatribe on the subject, I didn't need it from Jasper, too. I'm glad it was Jasper here and not Alice, though. I'd been ignoring her phone calls for the past two weeks. "And on a Thursday? That just smacks of a booty call, man." I think that's what she wanted.<p>

"What the hell am I supposed to do?" I asked a little defensively. "Wait around and pine for her? Put my life on hold until she figures her shit out?" I wished she would figure her shit out. I was shit without her. I couldn't think straight. I only went out with Tanya to see if I could be distracted from how shitty I felt. It didn't work.

"Edward, fucking look at me," Jasper's voice was that cool low tone he only used when he was really, really pissed off. It was much more effective than yelling. I did as he asked. "She has been trying to call you since a week after the beach incident. You have ignored her. She has been trying to tell you some very important shit. And _you _have ignored her. She tried to send you a message through Alice and now you're ignoring Alice, too. If you want to stay miserable, then do it on your own. You've pushed everyone one else away and Tanya was about the last straw for me." His eyes were serious and icy blue. "I'm about to let you just stew in your own juices."

Might as well. Emmett had his new best friend down in La Push. That had to be Rosalie's doing, even though I at one time I would have bet all my gaming systems that she didn't like Jacob. It was one of the few things we had in common. Jasper was right, I had been ignoring Alice because I knew she wanted to talk to me about Bella. Alice texted me that Bella had gone to Florida to stay with her mom. Bella hated being around her mom. What does that say about how she feels about me if she'd rather be with her flaky mom?

And now I'd pushed Alice away too. What the fuck was wrong with me? I needed to figure it out. Maybe I could salvage some of my friendships. But now Alice was dating that guy from her dance class. The name Riley even sounded gay. I reckoned that she'd come back around to Jazz when Riley figured out which team he batted for. Jazz was the only one of my close friends who actually still came around and now he was going to stop because I went on one date with a girl who pursued me pretty damn hard. There was only one reason I relented. And that was to _try_ to forget about Bella.

"She's dating some guy named James, Jasper," I finally said.

He looked perplexed. "Who? Tanya?"

"No, you prat. Bella. She went on a date with some kid named James," I said pinching the bridge of my nose trying to keep my patience.

"How do you even know that? You haven't talked to her and you won't talk to Alice. And Alice hasn't said anything about some guy named James," he replied like I was crazy. "And Al would have mentioned something like that to me." He was always so sure of Alice. How did he know? I didn't know why he didn't just hook up with Alice. I know it would look sort of weird since they lived in the same house and all, but most people thought they were involved anyway. I know he loved her deeply. I wanted that sense of sureness he had with Alice. He always seemed so content with her; and she with him. It's what I was trying to create with Bella and she'd just ran at full speed away from it.

"There was a picture of her on Twitter. They were at Starbucks." Bella didn't even like coffee.

"So you made an assumption based on a picture on her Twitter feed?" Jasper pulled out his phone and began scrolling. He was checking my accusation. "You know how creepy that is? Stalking her on Twitter?"

I stalked her on Facebook, too. Just because she dumped me doesn't mean I stopped loving her. It hurt to think she was moving on. That first week, seeing her at school was almost too much. I couldn't do it. So I stayed home. My mom and dad caught on after the school called on Tuesday. I'd left the house at normal time, after eating breakfast with them, and then went out back to the pool house. I didn't keep up the charade after that. They indulged me until Emmett came by on Friday. He was right, I did stink. My mom threatened to send me to therapy if I didn't clean myself up and get back to school. Not to mention she'd take away my car and drive me there herself if she had to. That would just be mortifying.

"Dude!" Jasper's voice pulled me from my thoughts. "She's just tagged in it; this isn't even posted by her. This is some guy trying to brag about something that isn't." I could see his fingers move to make the picture larger on his screen. "She's not even happy to be there, look." He held his phone up and he was right. She was doing her hurry-up-and-take-the-damn-picture face. She did that in Alice's selfies all the time. I only had one of us like that and that's because it was cold. And we had a lot of selfies together and she always looked so pleased to be next to me. I had hundreds of them, though now I wish I didn't delete all the naughty ones. Bella had a slightly kinky side, but she never let me keep the proof.

I loved her so much. And I missed her.

"Jazz, I just…" I trailed off pinching the bridge of my nose again. I didn't want to hear any more excuses. I had fucked up with Tanya. I knew that and it was going to be public knowledge by Monday.

"You're just pulling that creepy stalker shit you pulled while she was here. Talk to her, you ass-wipe, and find out what she wants. Tell her about Tanya before she gets wind of it from someone else—and I hope to God you didn't fuck her. You'll never lose that bitch if you did," his tone low again. "She's stalker psycho, too." I was a little offended by that remark. Was he equating me to Tanya? Why the hell did I agree to go out with her? And why did I let her kiss me.

"I didn't fuck her. We kissed a little. That's when I realized how much I missed Bella," I groaned.

"Then fix this. You love Bella. And from what Alice says, Bella loves you. Call Allie first thing in the morning and then call Bella so you can sort this shit out." Jasper was always the tactician with a plan.

He was right. I knew he was right. That week I spent lying on the couch I replayed what Bella said on the beach over and over again in my head. What I couldn't reconcile was why she didn't want what I wanted. I wanted to give her nice things and have her look nice. What was so wrong with that? Maybe my dad was right and I needed to talk to someone. I think he was off in the morning, too.

"Fine," I finally acquiesced. He was looking at his phone again and smirking. "Are you texting Alice while she's on her date? Dude that's almost as fucked up as me." He looked up at me and he was miffed.

"I've told you for the last time that Alice and I don't feel that way about each other. I'm not texting _her_. Nor am I going to divulge who I am texting because you'll just be an asshole about it." Why did everyone think I was an asshole? Shit! I'm a pretty fucking generous guy. I just like my friends to have nice things, including girlfriends.

"Why would you think I'd be an asshole?" I asked and my voice sounded petulant even to me. Rose always accused me of sounding like a child when I didn't get my way. Could she be right? Rosalie was known for her blunt honesty. I really liked that about her. I never had to guess what she was thinking.

"Really, dude? You're an asshole to most people. Em and I just get to see the other side of you once and a while," he said smiling at his phone. "I'm going to take off. I have people to see who will be happy I came." Shit. Maybe I was and asshole.

"Yeah, fine. I'll call Alice tomorrow. I'm sure that she'll tell you all about it," I said.

"I'm sure she will, brother." He looked over at me and held my gaze. "Edward, you're a great guy with a big heart. You need to let more people see it on their own…" he trailed off and gave me a meaningful look. I didn't know what that meant. But I didn't want to dwell on it either. I had bigger things to figure out.

"Thanks?" It sounded like a question but he just smiled at me. Fucking Jasper the Enigma. He left me alone in the pool house and the silence was deafening. I sprawled on the couch trying to keep my mind occupied on something other than how shitty I felt without Bella.

I reviewed the evening from the time Tanya picked me up to when she dropped me back off. I knew it was a bad idea to let her drive, but she insisted. I had a terrible time and I knew I was terrible company. She kept trying to impress me with her knowledge of books but all it did was remind me how much Bella loved literature. And Bella didn't just know the stories, she felt them…lived them. I missed that. And Tanya's clothes were way too tight. When she leaned over and tried to "take my mind of things" by sticking her boobs in my hand and her tongue down my throat I really did try to play along. But I just couldn't. It was empty. After Bella, Tanya was just a dumb, blonde tart trying to play a role. Sure she was beautiful, and she actually knew what she was talking about—but she lacked Bella's _passion_.

And Bella was beautiful without even trying. She didn't need to smear her face with makeup the way other girls like Tanya did. Bella didn't need to wear clothes that showed me everything she had. In fact, I liked that I had to guess what was under them. I liked Bella for Bella. I _loved_ Bella for Bella. But I didn't realize it until after she left me on the beach. Well. I guess I sort of left her.

Fuck! I left Bella alone on the beach. At night. Who does that? A wounded fucking prick does that.

I was a wounded fucking prick.

Shit.

I had to get out of that room. The pool house had officially become a room of mourning and I couldn't take it anymore. I wondered if my dad was home from work. He'd been trying to get me to talk since the night it happened, maybe he was up for it now. I peeled myself off the leather couch and buttoned up my shirt. Tanya had tried to get in there, but I stopped it before it got too far. I hoped I hadn't let her suck on my neck too long. I was just so angry after seeing that picture of Bella at Starbucks. Jasper was right, though. She didn't look like she wanted to be there.

Fuck. What the fuck did I do?

The night air was cold and wet, but it wasn't raining. I didn't have a jacket, but the walk to the house wasn't far. The chill actually cleared my mind a little and pulled me from the fuzzy, muddled, mental mess I'd been swimming in for the past few weeks. I could see the yellow glow of the kitchen light on from the pool house, but as I got closer to the main house I could see my father's blonde hair bobbing around the kitchen through the window above the sink. Just the thought of talking to him had me feeling a little better. I'd been trying to handle this all myself, like an adult, but I just wasn't ready. I didn't think dad would think less of me for that. I was only seventeen. I hoped he didn't. I loved it when he bragged on me and I never wanted to give him a reason to go back on his words.

I reached the back door and placed my hand on the knob. It was still wet from the earlier shower we'd had, and the heat seeping from my hand seemed to pull more fuzziness with it. I needed to talk to dad. I swallowed hard, hoping my pride made it down with the lump in my throat, took a deep breath, and opened the door. My dad looked up and his face relaxed when he saw it was me.

"Hey, son," he smiled, "how are you?" His voice was always so calm and soothing. I'd often wondered if he learned that at medical school or if he was always that way. I've tried to imagine my dad as any age other than this, but I just couldn't. I couldn't see him making the same mistakes I made and I can't see him other than what he is…perfect.

"I've been better, dad. I'll be honest with you," I mumbled. I slumped onto a stool at the bar. He was making a bacon and egg sandwich, his favorite after a really long day.

"Really?" he asked with an amused smile. He was buttering the toast that would hold his bacon, egg, and onion mixture. Sometimes he splashed a little salsa in there. It was really good and I realized I was hungry, too. I hadn't eaten much in the past few weeks.

"I know I've been acting a bit…" I didn't know how to put it. I'd been acting like a fucking lunatic. That walk in from the pool house in the cold autumn air really gave me some clarity, "…a bit morose." He laughed. My dad actually laughed at me. Out loud. "What?"

"Morose?" he laughed again. "Son, I was about to have you committed. Your mother wasn't kidding." He shook his head mumbling, "morose," under his breath again as we went to the refrigerator to grab the salsa. I was stunned. He was fucking laughing at me. My father. This was not good bedside manner. He chuckled again when he returned to the stove. "Close your mouth, Edward, and lighten up." He looked me in the eye and his face grew serious. "Talk to me, please." Back to the gentle voice.

"I miss her," I croaked and the dam that was holding back all my emotions broke. I don't remember my dad turning the stove off or coming around the kitchen island to grab me before I fell off my stool, but I do remember him literally supporting me while I blubbered uncontrollably like a little girl. When I was able to sit on my own again, he sat on the stool next to mine and listened to me tell him what happened on the beach and everything Bella, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper had said to me. He quit laughing and he listened with a proper bed side manner; I was heartsick afterall.

"Oh, son. You've been carrying all of this on your own for weeks?" he asked like I was crazy.

"You would have," I said hoping he'd be a little proud of me. I knew he wouldn't have gone to his father. Gramps was an ass-riding SOB and we only saw him twice a year because that's all my kind-hearted father could take. That said a lot.

"No, Edward, I wouldn't have. I would have leaned on any number of people. Even when I was your age, I would have gone to my uncle Aro." I'd forgotten about Uncle Aro. Gramps may have been a judgmental bastard, but Aro was really there for my dad. When he died I tried not to remember too much—it was just too painful. But forgetting the pain about Aro's death made me forget how much he helped my dad.

"I just wanted you to be proud of me," I mumbled. I looked down at the bar where I laid my hands to steady myself. They looked so pale against the dark blue tile. Maybe Emmett was right and I did look like shit.

"I am proud of you. But I have been worried about you for weeks now. And, I've been worried about you and Bella for even longer. I'm glad she's done this," he said. My head whipped up and his face was serious.

"What do you mean?" I asked. The surprise was thinly concealed in my voice.

"I mean that you hover over her. You fawn over her. You were smothering her." I pinched the bridge of my nose. I was too tired to fight it anymore, but I wanted someone to hear me.

"Dad, tell me what's wrong with wanting everything to be perfect," I pleaded. "I just want what you and mom have, that's all." I looked up into his blue eyes and they seemed to soften with…pity? Was that pity I saw?

"Edward, what makes you think what your mom and I have is perfect?" he asked and it totally blew me away. I didn't know what to say. They never argued or fought; they're always laughing; and I'd come home early on more than one occasion and promptly ran out to the pool house to escape the noises coming from their bedroom. I thought it was cool that they were old and still got it on, but I didn't want to _hear_ it. I just wanted what they had. I must have said it out loud because he was chuckling at me again.

"Everything I did with Bella I did to create what you and mom have," I consciously said aloud.

"Edward, you are not me and Bella is not your mother. And Esme and I fight all the time, we just don't do it in front of you. I hope that you still 'get it on' when your my age because then you'll understand that 'my age' isn't that old. But I really think you have a very skewed perception of what a perfect relationship is." I was beginning to believe him. He was right, I was not him and Bella was not mom. I felt a keen sense of gratitude for all the differences between the two women that ran through my mind because—gross!

"Edward," my dad said as I pondered the differences, "no relationship is perfect. And your mom and I have a great one. It's a partnership, but it's taken many years to work out the kinks." I saw his eyes flicker over my shoulder towards the stairs and he smiled. "She's certainly had to learn how to overlook some truly awful habits of mine."

"I don't know," my mother's voice sang from behind me, "it's been a fair trade off." She walked over and gave my father a peck on the check. She then walked around the island, turned the stove back on and proceeded to reheat the egg mixture in the pan. "What's this all about, anyway?"

My dad looked over at me with raised eyebrows, begging permission to tell her what I had confided in him. He was easy to read and that was because he was so open and honest. I nodded.

"Edward has finally confided in me the reasons why Bella asked for some time away from him," he said. He succinctly recounted what I'd told him using very clinical terms that made me sound much saner that I actually felt. I was pretty sure I had the best dad on the planet. By time he'd finished rehashing, he had a hot sandwich in front of him and I had one of my own sans onions—with salsa. My mother was practically perfect in every way.

"Oh, Edward," my mother crooned, "is that why you never let the poor girl order her own food?" she asked.

"I thought it was romantic," I squeaked. Now I was feeling stupid. "Dad always orders for you. And you like it." She was putting things back into the refrigerator and she grabbed herself a bottle of water. She held one up, silently asking my father if he wanted one. He pointed at his cup of decaf coffee and she smiled.

"Edward, he orders food I like. You always order Bella exactly what you get." She grabbed the pot of coffee and topped my father's cup off in order to warm it up. "I've seen her face after you placed her order on occasion," she continued. "Honestly, for someone who is as perceptive as you, you are not very good at reading Bella."

And in one sentence my mother had put her finger on the one thing that both intrigued me most about Bella and the thing that frustrated me the most about her. I couldn't read her. And she told me that she was too scared to tell me what she really thought. I must have said as much out loud.

"And that is why I think she is perfect for you," my mother said leaning on the counter after putting the coffee pot away. She took a sip of her own water. My father picked up his sandwich and took a bite.

"But how does dad know what you want to eat before he orders it?" I asked, still stuck on that dilemma and taking a bite of my own sandwich. It was perfection.

"He asks me," she said. My dad chuckled again. I'm glad I was so amusing to him. I scowled at him.

"But I've never seen him ask you," I said wracking my brain for a memory of the last time we were at a restaurant and he ordered for her.

"You've never seen us have sex, yet here are…living proof," he laughed and my mother gasped.

"Carlisle!" But she was laughing too.

"Oh come on!" I practically yelled. "That's enough. Now I'm really going to need therapy." Thanks for the mental picture you dirty old man!

"Edward, do you think I'm a mind reader?" he asked after his fit of manly giggles subsided. "When we decide where to go I ask her what she's in the mood for. We've gone to most places enough that I know what she'll order depending on whether she's in the mood for fish, chicken, pork, lamb, etcetera," he explained.

"No, I just…" I trailed off and when I didn't finish the sentence my dad just let me think for a bit. He was a mind reader when it came to me, it seemed. He took another bite of his sandwich and thanked my mom for finishing it and they started a little quiet conversation while I thought.

I took another bite of my sandwich and thought about how my mom knew that A) I was hungry and B) I didn't like onions. Then I thought about all the things that Bella ate, that she didn't really enjoy, but did because she just wanted to please me. And a hole in my chest ripped open.

What the fuck had I done?

It occurred to me that I didn't know what she liked to eat other than the occasional cherry pop tart. And all those comparisons I'd made between Bella and Tanya earlier…well, I realized that I liked the way Bella dressed herself. And if we were going someplace special I was sure that Bella would be appropriate. Why didn't I trust her? I liked her strong mind. I liked unraveling the riddle and putting together the Bella puzzle. I'd just gotten lost in making pieces fit in one spot that belonged in another. I had to get the edges of the puzzle first, then I could fill it in.

"What the fuck have I done?"

"Edward?" my mom's voice was serious again. I must have said that one out loud.

"Sorry, mom. I am. But I've really messed this up. I have to go see her," I gushed.

"Didn't I hear that she was in Florida?" my dad said through a mouth full of food.

"Yeah, but I can—" I tried but my mom cut me off.

"You _cannot_ miss any more school, young man! A week of moping and skipping school burned all my patience with your teenage angst," she declared. My mind was reeling with my epiphenomenon. I had so much to tell her. I had so much to apologize for. I had to see her.

"Well, he does have Monday off. There's a teacher work day and students don't go to school," my dad interjected. "He could leave right after school tomorrow on the red-eye flight and go see her." My head jerked up again and my eyes filled with tears. "I could arrange for a car service in Florida so he wouldn't be just wandering all alone across the continent."

"Carlisle, we should really discuss this elsewhere," she said flashing him a meaningful look.

"No, I don't think so," my dad said to her while looking at me. "He has this idea that we never disagree and he needs to see how we work things out. Even if it means we talk about him like he's not here." He winked at me. He knew I hated that. But I was intrigued. My mom looked at me and nodded.

"Okay," she looked back at my dad, "he's only seventeen and this is his teenage crush. Do we really want to indulge this kind of behavior?"

"Hey!" I called feeling very defensive that my mother just reduced the love of my life to a teenage crush.

"Son, if you want to see this you have to keep quiet and let us work through our process," my father's stern voice resonated through the kitchen. This was not his quiet, tranquil demeanor. Okay, dad. You're on my side. I'll shut up. I nodded.

"Sorry, mom," I said, trying to be contrite. He'd reprimanded me, but I'd interrupted my mom so she got the apology. They _were_ such a team.

"Esme," he continued like neither he nor I had said a word, "the behavior he has been exhibiting is dangerous and, quite frankly, I'm scared to death. I think he's just had a little break through and if wants to see her, I think there would be very little we could do to stop him."

My dad was scared for me? Shit. He never said anything. He just waited for me to come to him on my own terms. Which was better, because I wouldn't have listened to him had he done it any other way. And he said he wasn't a mind reader.

"I think that if we allow him to go, with our blessing and help, then things will turn out much better than if he sneaks off and does it on his own. We've given him the means—let's not give him the motive," my father continued.

"True," my mom agreed, "he has access to the credit cards and car. It would be a pain to stop or cancel them and doing so would send the message that we don't trust him. Then he'll never come to us again." She stood upright, shaking her hands in front of her and walking in little circles. It was her cute little habit when she was nervous about something. "I want him to feel like he can come to us, Carlisle. And he's always been so dependable and honest. Well, that is until he skipped school for a week." She broke the fourth wall of the little scene to give me a pointed look. This little staged scene really helped me see myself through their eyes. I'd lied to them and they still just waited for me to come to them. They did trust me, even though I'd really fucked up. I needed to trust them, too.

"Yes. So let's not push him to lie to us anymore. He's here. He's asking for our help," my father was up off his stool and stopped my mother's pacing. He pulled her into his arms and looked at me over the top her head. I could see pride there. He _was_ proud of me.

And that's what I wanted. I knew then I would honor whatever they decided.

"I'm sorry I did that," I blurted out to my mom. "I'm sorry I lied and skipped school. I've messed up so much and now I need to fix it. I promise, mom, that if you let me go—and I'll do whatever you say," I readily admitted, "that I'll be back in school on Monday as if I'd slept all weekend." I saw my dad smile.

My mom pulled away from my dad and turned in his arms which stayed wrapped around her. Her face softened, but her eyes were still sad. "Okay, Edward. I'll let you go if you agree to utilize the car service, check in with Bella's mom, and abide by all their house rules. They have to know you're coming," she said sternly. "Your name may not be very popular in a house of women." I hadn't thought of that. I had some planning to do. But I'd do anything to get Bella back.

And I wanted her back on her terms. We had a lot to talk about.

"Okay, deal. I'm going to go upstairs and book my flight!" I called from the bottom step. I stopped abruptly and rushed back to both of them pulling my dad into a hug and squashing my mom in between us. "Thanks, mom. Thanks, dad. I really appreciate this and I won't let you down!"

My dad was chuckling again as my mom's muffled "I love you, too" rumbled through my chest.

I took the stairs two at a time but I heard my dad yell, "no first class! Fly business or economy!"

I didn't know if Bella would answer my phone call—I didn't deserve it after ignoring hers for so long. So, I sent a text.

"Bella, I've been a dick. I'm sorry. I'd like to come see you and talk, but my mom and dad say that I need to have your blessing as well as your mom's to come to Florida. Would you be willing to see me if I made the trip? Please let me apologize in person and try to explain all the things I've learned. Please. I love you. I hope you still find me worthy of your love. Edward."

I hit send before I could spend too much time thinking about it. When I didn't hear back from her after ten minutes, I began to regret the wording, message, and most of all, the timing. I forgot that Florida was three hours ahead of Washington and I was sure she thought I was still an insensitive prick. I searched airline prices while I waited growing antsier and antsier as the seconds ticked by. But then my phone buzzed and I nearly fell off my desk chair.

"I look forward to talking with you in person. But remember that my step-father knows how to swing a bat. Send me your flight information when you have it."

I laughed for the first time in weeks at her not so subtle threat. It was something she would have said to Jake. And I already felt better. I think it meant that she was in a comfortable place. My phone buzzed again. I swiped the screen and smiled through my happy tears at her message.

"I can't _**not**_ love you, Edward. It's my tragic flaw." Her allusion to Shakespeare made me love her even more.

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><p><strong>AN: So reviews have been down and that's got me a little down. I hope you haven't lost interest in the story. I'm thinking I might have to go back and revamp some stuff. If I do that, I'll pull it down and repost it as a new story. If you're interested in following a new, improved, and revised version (if I decide to do that) add me to your favorite author's list. **

**Please give me your thoughts and show me some love.**

**Next up: Renee**


	7. Chapter 7 Renee

**A/N: So here's Renee's point of view.**

**As always, thank you to MarinaNamaste for her beta genius and guidance to sanity in a crazy, crazy world.**

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><p>The beeping was driving me crazy and I had to get out of there. But I knew that if I left, and Bella woke up alone, she'd freak out. She was just like her father all needy and clingy, but tried to look all independent.<p>

It was a good thing she'd gone to live with him in Washington, but this thing with that boy Edward was just too much for her. I was proud of her for coming here to clear her head, but he was all she thought about. Still. There was something wrong with that.

I wished she'd just wake up.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _

Yeah I got it you stupid piece of shit machine.

I just wanted her to go to a regular high school party and have some fun like a normal high school girl. Was that so wrong?

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _

I wish the nurses could turn that fucking thing off.

And that Edward guy was on his way here to the hospital. I'd texted him about the accident from her phone.

I needed to cancel my yoga class or find someone to cover it for me.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _

That was just mind numbing. That and the buzzing from Edward calling Bella's phone was about to drive me crazy. Good thing I could just solve the phone problem. I couldn't figure out how to turn her stupid phone off so I took the battery out.

I wondered if Phil was hungry. He'd be getting up soon and he'd need his protein shake. He knew where the stuff was. He'd be okay.

_Buzz. Buzz. _

That was my phone. Shit. Charlie was calling me. Shit. I bet that little fucker Edward called him when no one answered Bella's phone.

I just wanted a little peace to think about all this. Was that so wrong?

With all the beeping and the buzzing I couldn't wrap my brain around the fact that my daughter was lying in a hospital with more broken bones than I could remember to name.

I sighed. No sense in postponing the inevitable. I guessed I had to tell Charlie sometime.

"Hello?" I answered trying to sound chipper.

"Renee? What is wrong with Bella? She was fine at 22:00 last night. Why did I get a phone call from her ex-boyfriend from Forks, who is now in Jacksonville, telling me he got a text from you on Bella's phone that she had been in an accident and to meet you both at the hospital? Why, Renee? Why did I hear that from Edward and not from _you_?"

Fuck. I was going to get that kid when he got here.

"Well, Charlie, Bella's been in an accident and I was going to call you, but it was in the middle of the night there," I tried to explain.

"Renee!" he interrupted, "I'm her father! You need to call me whenever anything happens _as soon_ as it happens. I have a cell phone for a reason." Blah. Blah. Blah. Like he could do anything from Forks anyway. "Do you even have her insurance information?" he asked.

Shit. I didn't and the hospital people had been bugging me about that for the past few hours.

"I'm surprised they even processed her. Renee, this is just like you…" I tuned him out. Like I needed to hear this tirade for the eight thousandth time.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Renee?" Charlie still sounded miffed. He was done lecturing.

"I was going to call you as soon as Edward got here so he could sit with her in case she woke up and she was alone," I tried to placate him.

"When she wakes up! What the hell happened? What is wrong with her?" he hollered. Charlie was usually so sedate. I was a bit shocked by his raised voice. Where was all this emotion when I wanted him to feel something?

"Charlie, calm down. She's fine. She just has a few broken bones and they sedated her. She'll be awake soon." I hope.

"What happened?" his voice sounded tight, but calm. I could tell he was working very hard to control himself.

"She went to a party at a friend's house and they got into a car accident on the way home," I explained.

"They?" he interjected. "Who are they? Who, exactly, was our daughter gallivanting around with in a strange town at God knows what hour of the night?" When did he become so dramatic.

I didn't want to tell him that James had been drinking and that he'd walked away from the accident with only a few bruises and cuts.

"Had Bella been drinking? Was she driving?" I could always count on Charlie to ask the right questions.

"No. And No," I replied and hoped he'd let the rest go. But I knew better so I preempted the next set of questions. "Look Charlie, there is little you can do right now from there." Let me stew on his ineffectiveness for a while and it'll get his mind off me. "Let me put you on with the nurse so you can give them the insurance information and they can give you better information." He grunted his assent.

Good. That will keep both Charlie and the nurses off my back.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Renee, just tell me what hospital you're at. I have another call."

Good. Now I didn't even have to find a nurse or give up my phone. I told him and hung up.

I hoped I could make my pedicure appointment later that afternoon. Bella should be awake by then and maybe she'd want to be alone. Especially if that Edward was around.

A nurse came bustling in to, I guess, check all Bella's vitals.

"Is there any way to turn that machine off?" I asked.

"You mean the one monitoring her heart rate?" she asked a little annoyed.

"Yeah. It's driving me crazy." Was that so wrong?

"No," she said flatly. She held my gaze like I was some sort of criminal and then went back to touching Bella all over the place.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _

I hated the smell of this place, too. Would air fresheners be such a hard thing to buy?

And, how about some brighter paint for the walls? No wonder people found hospitals depressing.

Maybe I could get a job doing interior design for hospitals. I could be Dr. Cheer. I could do a catchy slogan like, _Your prognosis is clearer when your room is cheerier. _

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Buzz. _

My phone again. I didn't recognize this number. I slid my finger across the screen anyway.

"Mrs. Dwyer?" a male voice called when I answered. "This is Edward Cullen. I'm in the lobby, what room is she in?" Oh. Charlie had given the little prick my number.

"Three fourteen, Edward. Good to hear from you," I said trying to sound sincere. I didn't think it worked.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

I was sure the nurse was just trying to irritate the hell out of me and that's why she refused to turn the volume down on that effing machine. I didn't even notice when she left.

I texted Phil to make sure he was awake.

When the Edward walked in, I suddenly knew why my baby was so smitten. Shit, he was fucking gorgeous! Tall, lean, and built, he was dressed like a GQ model. He had all this wild coppery hair on the top of his head that complimented those bright green eyes. I wondered what made him so interested in my little forty-year-old teenager. I must have been gawking because he rolled his precious emerald eyes at me.

"Mrs. Dwyer?" he asked sounding annoyed. His eyes flickered towards the hospital bed.

"Ah, yes," I stammered. "You must be Edward. I'm sorry you made this trip right after this happened." Damn, he was hot.

"I'm not. I'm glad I was already on my way. What happened? Was it that James kid?" That caught me off guard. How did he know about James? Had Bella been talking to him? She'd said Edward was ignoring her.

"Well, yes. James was driving." It wasn't like Bella to lie and I could usually tell if she was. No, I knew this kid's over-protective tendencies; he'd been internet spying on her. I didn't know much about that stuff, but I'd seen Bella do it to him on her computer thingy too. Maybe they were two peas in a pod. Maybe that wasn't such a good thing. "I sent her out to a party last night to get her mind off of you."

I had a thought and I decided to act on it. "You know she's been seeing James for a while, right?" I could see that he knew and it worked. His eyes hardened. I didn't want him to think he could come in and just sweep her off her feet again. Though, I'd let him sweep me anywhere. Bella did have good taste.

"I heard something about that, yes. But I have some important things to tell her so that she can move on with her life and make some informed decisions," he said carefully.

"I see," I bit my lip trying to figure out what that meant. His eyes moved back toward Bella's little broken body in the bed hooked up to all those tubes and monitors. His face wrinkled with concern and longing.

"Can you tell me what happened, please?" he asked in a voice that made me feel truly sorry for him. His shoulders slumped and all of a sudden he looked tired, worn, and truly depressed. He really did care for my daughter.

"I'm sorry, honey," I crooned. "James was driving her home from the party—a little too early by the way—and he lost control of the car and hit a tree on Bella's side." That's what the doctor said anyway.

"Had he been drinking?" A muscle tightened in his jaw when asked and his emerald eyes went cold and hard. I didn't want to answer that. I knew he had been. I actually wanted Bella to let loose a little bit, but I never intended this to happen. My pause seemed to confirm his suspicions and made him angry. "You let her go out with someone who was going to drive after he'd been drinking?"

Okay, that was enough. Who did this kid think he was? Like I planned to let James drive her home while intoxicated. I was an adult and I was Bella's mother. He had no right to judge me or give me parenting advice. "Are you telling me, that you're some kind of Mormon saint and no alcohol has ever passed your lips?" I sneered.

"No, I'm not. But when we do drink it's in someone's home and our parents have all the keys to our cars," he said. "And Bella doesn't drink. She doesn't like the taste." Of course my daughter the non-Mormon prude. I blamed that on living in Arizona for so long.

"Who do you think you are, Mister?" I asked no longer trying to be nice. "I'm trying to get my daughter to live her life like a teenager and have some normal experiences. You had her eating lobster and going to country club catilliions like some retiree."

"You can't force Bella to be someone she's not," he said fiercly. I had had enough. The hypocricy was just too much for me. His chin trembled and just that little movement transformed his handsome face into that of a little boy's. "Believe me, I tried," he finished weakly.

I wasn't expecting that.

"And she left me." He slumped down in a chair and my heart went out to him. It seemed he had learned his lesson. He was here to tell her he was wrong. Sincerity rolled off him; I could feel it. He'd learned a hard lesson and I could smell his hope of reconciliation. It smelled just like Charlie. He'd carried that scent for years.

"Yes. She did." My heart twitched a little. She left me, too when I tried to do the same. She went to Charlie. My Bella _was_ strong. My Bella was going to be her own person because she removed herself from influences that prevented that. That was something I never considered before. Nor could I find anything wrong with that.

"She's got a few broken bones," I relented, "her leg and some ribs. Her wrist is strained, but not broken and the doctor said she's going to be bruised for a while."

"How bad is James?" he asked with a sardonic laugh. He and Charlie probably got along really well.

"He's at home already," I said and looked at the floor. I understood how they felt—Bella still being here and the drunk kid at home in bed. They did do a blood test before he left the hospital. Edward moved and sat in the chair next to her bed. He was done talking to me. He only had eyes for her. Fine with me.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _

"Hey, Edward, do you want something to drink? I've been here all night and I need some coffee. I didn't want to leave her before, you know, in case she woke up."

"No," he said not taking his eyes off her, "I'm good." I watched him pick up her hand and stroke it so lovingly. Yeah, Edward might just be what she needs. He's like her in a good way and he's learned his lesson.

I took my time and took care of some things while I had the chance. Marina agreed to cover my yoga class and we talked for a bit. She was worried about Bella and wondered if I could use a cooked meal tonight. Such a lovely thought, but I told her we'd be just fine. I called Phil who was up and moving. He'd be at practice most of the day so I didn't have to worry about him. Phil was pretty low maintenance.

I found the coffee shop and ordered my usual and was pretty impressed. It was good. Even for a hospital coffee bar.

I didn't cancel my pedicure. If Edward was here, he could keep her company. I didn't need the skin on my heels cracking.

I took the stairs back up to the third floor since I was missing my exercise for the day. Having a daughter in the hospital was not an excuse to get fat.

I stopped at the nurses' station to see if Charlie had given them everything they needed. I wanted them to know that I tried at least. He had. Charlie was so dependable.

"And the arrangements to take her back to Washington are all set," the dour-faced nurse said.

"What?" I asked. "I didn't ask for any arrangements to be made."

"Chief Swan and Dr. Cullen were very adamant and when her vitals are stable she'll be on a charter flight back to Washington." Her tone was final like I had no say in the matter.

That was pretentious. Who had that kind of money? I knew Charlie didn't. Charlie was great about child support payments, but it's because of that I knew what he pulled in a year. These Cullens really thought they had everything on their silver platter. That's who had to be funding this. What I couldn't figure out is why Charlie would let them. He was such a proud man.

"Thank you," I bit out. She just smiled back at me. Bitch. She thought she was better than me. I could tell. There was something so wrong with that.

The door to Bella's room was cracked and I could hear that she was awake. Her voice was scratchy and groggy but she sounded lucid and...relieved?

"I'm so sorry, Edward. I knew better, I was just so irritated. I wanted to go home and I was so insistent and James was just trying to give me what I wanted," Bella apologized.

I felt a little awkward standing there listening, but I wasn't going to move. I needed to know how far gone my little Charlietta was over her Edward.

"Bella, this is all my fault. If I wasn't such an asshole you wouldn't have left me. And you wouldn't have been here and you wouldn't have been in that car…" he trailed off.

"Edward, shit happens. This isn't any _one_ person's fault."

"Bella," he cut her off, "I have to tell you something before this goes any further. Before you decide if you want to forgive me I have to tell you." I heard him take a deep breath like he was steeling himself for something. "I went out with Tanya on Thursday night." The guilt in his voice was heavy. "We kissed and stuff, but that's what made me realize that…" I heard a hitch in his voice. I could picture that chin quivering again. "…it made me realize that she wasn't you and I didn't want her. I only want you."

"Did you…" I heard Bella's soft, scared voice ask, "…please tell me you didn't."

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. _

Fucking thing got faster.

"No, Bella, I didn't have sex with her," his voice was urgent and placating. "No, that's only ever been you." Shit. I needed to make sure that my baby wasn't making babies. She better be on the damn pill.

"That's what I thought," the beeping slowed a bit. "I thought that, but I got a text."

"Shit," Edward said. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I'll understand if you don't want me back. I just wanted you to know that I realized what a controlling asshole I've been. Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper telling me had a little bit to do with it." Bella chuckled. "But I also wanted you to know that if you would take me back, it'd totally be on your terms. What that experience with Tanya taught me was that I love you. I love the way you dress. I love your passion and your fire. And, I need to learn what you like to eat because I have no fucking idea."

"Oh, Edward," Bella sighed. "God, I missed you." I could hear the rustling of sheets. I could tell he was going in for the kiss.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Edward, I want to be with you, but…" he cut her off.

"I only want you on your terms. You order your food, you pick your clothes, you tell me whatever you're thinking." Edward's voice dripped with sincerity.

"Do you mean that?" she asked. Uh-oh. Edward was in for it. She had Charlie's I-mean-business voice.

"Yes, Bella. I do. Why? What are you thinking?" Edward asked warily.

"Jacob," she said. And she let it hang in the air.

"Bella," he sounded defeated.

"Jacob is my oldest friend. He is family," it sounded like the eight hundredth time she'd said it.

"He was more than family…" she cut him off this time and it sounded like this was an old, old argument.

"Until you," she crooned. "I broke his heart for _you_. I chose _you_ to be with. I love Jacob, but I am _in love_ with _you_." She gave him some time to process that. "If you don't trust me, then this can't happen."

"Bella, I do trust you. I do," he paused. I could just see the disbelieving look on Bella's face. "I do trust you, Love. I just get…" he stammered a bit, "I guess I get jealous. I'm jealous of how easy you are around him. It's hard to watch."

"Edward, we're going to be like that soon. If I don't have to worry about doing everything wrong all the time, I will be that comfortable around you."

"Really?" he croaked like he didn't believe it.

"Yes," she crooned to him. "He's completely head over heels in love with Nessie anyway."

"I heard about that," Edward said warily. "From Emmett. Jake has stolen him from me." His tone was light but forced.

"Come here," Bella called to him. "I've missed your lips on mine."

"Me, too," he said.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

The beeping increased again. The nurse bustled by me. "Okay you, two," there was a smile in her voice. She never smiled for me. I heard another giggle. Yeah, Bella was done for. "You know she's out there listening, sweetie?" I heard the nurse ask. Bitch. I really didn't like her. I pushed the door open.

Bella's big brown eyes rolled over to me. She just shook her head at me and Edward moved back to his chair. She tried to smile, "Hey, mom."

"Hey baby," I said walking over and picked up her hand.

"You've met Edward, I take it," she said and her big brown eyes moved over his direction. He was still holding her hand. The nurse worked around him checking all her vitals again.

"I sure have." Silly SOB. He'd already planned how to get her back to Washington. Without even consulting me. "Apparently he's already booked your passage home, Sweetie."

"And all your vitals look great. I'll call Dr. Cullen and let him know," the nurse said in a light voice.

"Wait, what?" Edward asked looking from me to the nurse. So he didn't know. He wasn't in on it.

"You're Dr. Cullen's son, I assume," the nurse said with another smile.

"Yes, I am. Do you know him?" he asked. That smile really did light up his face. My daughter had good taste. Nothing wrong with that.

"Yes," she blushed, "he was a resident when I was fresh out of nursing school. He helped me quite a bit. When he called to find out the extent of Bella's injuries I recognized his voice. He said that as soon as she was stable he'd made all the arrangements to fly her back to Forks to be with her father." She looked over at me. "He also said that her mother was invited for the trip and that she was welcome to stay as long as she wished." The last bit sounded a bit forced.

"How am I supposed to afford the return flight?" I asked to no one in particular. "I can't just pick up and leave."

"I'm sure that invitation includes your flight home, Mrs. Dwyer," Edward assured. I hated being called Mrs. Dwyer. It made me sound so old.

"Call me Renee, please," I said. "And I don't think I could take such charity."

"Mom, don't be like that," Bella said.

"Like what?" I asked. Though I knew what she was implying. She was always telling I was great at making everything "Renee-centric." Whatever that meant.

What I didn't understand was how she was okay with the arrangement. Bella didn't like gifts and she hated a fuss being made over her. Was she into taking lavish gifts from her high school boyfriend? I'd be talking to Charlie about that.

"You know what, mom," Bella's voice sounded tired. "Don't make this about you. Please. This is about getting me back to where I'm comfortable so I can heal. Dad knows me and I feel comfortable with Dr. Cullen." What did she mean make this about me? When do I make things about me? And what did she mean about comfortable? Wasn't she comfortable here? What else did she want from me?

"Do you want me to go, baby?" I asked sincerely curious. Though the more I thought about it, it'd be a nice break from the routine. I hadn't been to Washington in years. It'd be a nice change of pace. For a while.

"Sure, mom," she said. It wasn't very convincing. And there were other snags.

"Where would I stay?" It was an honest question. I was pretty sure that Charlie didn't want me at his house. "Charlie's house was never big enough for the two of us and now we have more baggage and you," I said referring to our years' worth of emotional frustration. It was just too uncomfortable.

"We have plenty of room at our house," Edward offered. "And my mother is a great cook."

"So is your dad," Bella added with a smile.

"That he is," Edward beamed with pride. Blech.

"Does he still make cinnamon rolls?" Nurse Ratchet asked.

"The best!" Edward and Bella said together and they all burst out laughing.

Maybe I could get my pedicure early.

"Do you mind if I go home and pack up some stuff?" I asked. I had to get out of there. Maybe I could catch a nap.

"I don't see why not," Edward said looking at his phone, still with that hansom GQ smile gracing his features. "I'll call dad and see what he has planned.

And that's how I found myself on a private charter plane with newly polished toes and supple and exfoliated heels.

Marina was going to be covering my yoga classes for a few weeks.

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><p><strong>Next up: Jasper<br>**

**Leave me some love.**


	8. Chapter 8 Jasper

**A/N: Thanks to MarinaNamaste as always for her amazing beta skillz. Here's the Jasper chapter.**

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><p>"Dude! You're using the wrong fuckin' gun again! Switch before I kick your actual nutsack," Emmett bellowed at Edward. Edward was never very good at COD and we always had to tell him to switch to an M1 grenade because he thought the sniper rifle looked cooler. But it was completely ineffective.<p>

"Edward, I don't think he's kidding," I said as I saw Emmett look towards Edward's crotch. I hoped he wasn't kidding.

"And how is that going to help our current situation?" Edward asked actually hitting a target with his boneheaded choice of a gun. We were getting our asses kicked.

"It will make me feel better, for one," Emmett said looking back at the screen and killing the guy on his tail. "Jasper, get the other one!" My avatar on the screen turned and found that dirty Nazi in my sight and, pressing down on the R1, I dropped him to the streets of Berlin. A few seconds later the screen went black and we finally finished.

"That took _much_ longer than it should have," I drawled and moved off the couch. I knew what was coming. Emmett set down his controller and moved so fast there was no way to block the brutal sack tapping he laid on Edward.

"Fuck, Emmett!" Edward yelled over Emmett's guffaws. "Why do you think that is so funny? It just hurts." His voice was the pussy, whiney tone that made me want to sack tap him just make sure he still had balls.

"That's what makes if funny," he snorted back.

I just smiled at the two of them. I was a bit more subtle. They wouldn't know I'd hit them until I was across the room. I'd wondered a few times why dudes found hitting another dude's testicles so fuckin' funny. Maybe it was a way to prove dominance and masculine superiority. I didn't really care. I agreed with Emmett that it was just funny to watch another dude grasp his balls in pain.

Edward limped his way to the refrigerator and grabbed himself a Mountain Dew and cracked it open. He took a sip and Emmett, who was still chuckling, headed over to do the same. Idiot. Emmett was fast and strong, but he couldn't seem to learn from his mistakes because every time he did this to Edward, Ed got him back within the next few minutes. I moved over to the recliner for better view of the recon mission.

As soon as Emmett cracked open his can of Dew, Edward's fist hit its mark and Emmett doubled over after spraying the sticky, yellow piss water all over both of them. Idiots.

"Shit, Emmett, Elsa's going to think I peed all over the place when she comes to clean," Edward yelled reaching for a hand towel.

"You're the dickhead who hit me with a mouthful of soda, man. You fucker."

"I sincerely hope you are not going to leave that sticky mess here until Monday for that nice lady to clean up," I said. "You are too old to be that irresponsible."

"That's what we pay her for," Edward scoffed.

"True," I continued, "but Renee is staying out here and she doesn't need to get stuck in this shit." I looked at the mess, "or piss water as the case may be." Edward had made a lot of progress since he came back from Florida, but he still had a long way to go to not be such and entitled asshole all the time.

"Fuck you, Jasper," Edward said. "I hate it when you make sense."

"I don't care," I responded. "I just thought this new, less assholey, Edward you were trying out would want to know when he was being an asshole." I smirked at him. It'd been fun to guilt him all week long.

"Leave him alone, Jazz," Em said while he squatted down to wipe up Edward's oral spray of florescent yellow, liquid corn syrup. There was a reason I didn't drink that shit. I wanted the harder stuff. "He's just a little pent up. A month of no sex with your estranged girlfriend and then no makeup sex because she's hurt will make anyone testy," Emmett chortled as he finished cleaning up the mess. His mom was a cleaning lady at a shit-hole hotel in town. Well, when she actually showed up to work.

"How the hell would you know? You and Rosalie haven't had sex yet," Edward grinned knowing he was finally in a conversation where he felt he had the upper hand.

"We've been doing okay," Emmett said bringing the can up to the edge of his self-satisfied lips and taking another drink of his Dew. He had taken getting hit in the nads a lot better than Edward. But Edward didn't hit as hard, either.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Edward asked. "Have you or haven't you?"

"Let's just say that my fingers have been doing the walking and my tongue gets to do some talking. She's been calling my name with an 'O' face a lot more than your name's been muttered lately." Emmett squared his shoulders. "And my baby has some good rhythm, too." He grunted a little and gave his balls a hoist. "I may have not slid into home plate yet, Eddie, but third base has been a lot of fun for me and Rosie while you're stuck on first for a while."

I just shook my head and chuckled. "How is Bella doing?" I asked while they both took another swig of their drinks. Ed really was a changed man when he came home. The brooding, self-centered Edward was gone. He was all about helping Bella and Charlie—Edward's new best friend. Edward and Charlie seemed to have bonded over their mutual dislike for Renee. Edward was nicer to his parents and even the people at school. For some reason, only Emmett, Alice, and I saw the softer side of Edward, but before this whole Bella break up he'd never let anyone outside our circle see it. Well, Rosalie occasionally. But lately he's been actually smiling at people. That was confusing for the girls and irritating for the boys. I just found it amusing.

"Really well," his smile got really big then. "She's going back to school on Monday. She's not even behind because we've used this past week to get everything caught up and turned in. She's only got four classes anyway so she'll sit in study hall while I finish up my day and I can take her back home." His tone was happy and excited.

"And _she's_ okay with that?" Emmett asked in a concerned big brother voice.

"Yeah," Edward beamed, "it was her idea." I was thirsty now. I got up and headed around the kitchenette island of the Cullen pool house on the opposite side of the two idiots. Emmett was standing leaning against the counter near the sink and Edward was right near the refrigerator. I opened the door and pulled out a Red Bull. The hard stuff. I also pulled out an orange and smiled to myself.

"You hungry, Jasper?" Edward asked. He heard me close the fruit drawer. "We can go get some grub from the main house." I closed the refrigerator door.

"Sure," I said wrapping my left hand around the thin can of the energy drink while my right hand gripped the orange like a baseball. Before Edward could turn around I shot my hand down, hitting him in the nads. Then, before Emmett's eyes could even widened with his trademark laughter at Edward, I pitched that orange with a force that could rival Randy Johnson, the orange finding direct, painful contact with McCarthy's crotch.

All those pitching lesson's Alice's parents paid for really came in handy while sack tapping. And I'd just landed a double.

"Shit!" "Fuck!" they both yelled while I marched past both of them and out the door of the pool house. Idiots. I really did love them. I cracked open my can of Red Bull and downed it in a few gulps.

"He's gonna fuckin' get it one of these days," I heard Emmett's grunted whisper to Edward.

Whatever. They never teamed up against me so they'd never beat me. I'm too fast and wiry.

The night was cold and we ran the rest of the way to the back door. We crashed in to find Dr. Cullen sitting at the kitchen table with Renee and Mrs. Cullen standing behind Dr. Cullen, both rubbing his shoulders.

"See you have to press right here," Renee was instructing, "you feel that?"

"Yes," Mrs. Cullen said with a conciliating voice. Dr. Cullen looked really uncomfortable. All three sets of eyes moved to us as we came in.

"Hey boys!" Renee greeted without removing her hands. It looked like Mrs. Cullen wasn't about to take her hands off her husband and leave the other set there either. Dr. Cullen flashed Edward a look that said, _Son, your girlfriend's mother is insane._

"Hey, Mrs. Dwyer," Edward called.

"Edward, what have I told you about that?" she scolded. "When will you call me Renee?"

"When you quit rubbing on my father," Edward said dryly. Both Cullens smirked at that and Renee laughed heartily.

"Edward, that's not very nice," Mrs. Cullen said but her tone did not match words. It sounded more relieved.

"I'm showing your mother how to relieve the tension of a fourteen hour shift." Her excuse was thinly veiled.

"I think after twenty years of marriage they've got it down," Edward pressed on. "That's part of the reason I spend so much time in the pool house." Shit, Edward. Shout out their sex life why don't you? "We're done in there, by the way, if you want your space back," Eddie hinted.

Mrs. Cullen blushed while the good doctor's smirk showed just a little bit of pride that his son was being so assertive in that awkward situation.

"Well, Edward, thank you. I was feeling a little tired, but I want to point out one more thing." She was still kneading one side of Dr. Cullen's shoulder and turned her attention back to what she was doing. "So, Esme, this will be easy to feel since your husband is in such good shape. My Phil has just a little more definition than Carlisle, but right here," she moved Esme's hand to feel what she was talking about, "will help relieve all the tension." Then Renee did something that made Dr. Cullen release a groan of pleasure and Renee's hands danced over to the side Esme was working on and did the same thing.

"So, you do it," Renee instructed and Esme did with the same results. Dr. Cullen's face relaxed and he looked spent. "Now, I'm going to head out the pool house and I suggest you guys go somewhere else to get something to eat." Renee smirked. I had misjudged this woman. She was not stupid and she was quite calculating. It made me smile.

"I think that's a great idea," I added as Emmett guffawed. "I'll drive." I had the Brandon's SUV tonight so Emmett wouldn't have to be squashed in Edward's dinky Volvo.

Renee was gathering up her things on the table. "Thanks for dinner—again. I really wish there was more I could do repay you for all your kindness to both Bella and me," Renee said to the Cullens. There was something in her voice that I recognized. Her sincerity at really not knowing what she could do to because she didn't have the means or money to do for herself what they were doing for her. That's what the massage was about. She could give Esme knowledge if nothing else.

I knew that feeling. It was my life; I lived it every day. Mops and Pops, as I called them, said all I had to do to repay them was be good, get good grades, get into college, and have a good life. So, I worked very hard to do all those things. The Brandons were good people and I also knew how important appearances were to Mrs. Brandon. So I tried to comply with all her unspoken expectations, too. All I had to offer was my compliance, so I offered it. That is how I was able to understand Renee and the little massage scene. She wasn't hitting on Dr. Cullen at all.

"Thank you, Renee," Dr. Cullen said, "for teaching Esme how to do that. That will come in very handy." He looked at his wife with pleading eyes. He understood, too. "I didn't realize how uncomfortable that was until it was gone."

"And now that you've taught Mrs. Cullen so she can fix it when you need it," I offered. Mrs. Cullen looked at me then and I knew she understood as well.

"Yes, thank you, Renee," Mrs. Cullen said like she meant it. The Cullens were so easy to read and be around. They were easy going, sincere, and honest. It was part of the reason I didn't give up on Edward when he was such a fucking douchebag. He just wanted to be like his parents—he was just failing at it.

"Well, I'll see you all in the morning," Renee said. It seemed that the Cullen's sincerity touched her a bit and she was choked up. I could see she wanted out of there so I moved aside so she could make a hasty exit. There were a murmur of good nights and thank yous. She closed the door quietly before disappearing quickly.

"So you boys are going out for some food?" Dr. Cullen asked and his eyebrows shot up in hopeful anticipation. "How long do you think you'll be?"

"A long time," Emmett chortled having already caught on. "I'm starving."

"Let's get some Chinese," Edward said. Idiot.

"Dude, I said I was hungry. We're not eating your faggot food tonight," Emmett bellowed. "I wish the Hard Rain Café was open at night. I could really use one of their burgers."

"Let's go to Sully's," I offered before Edward could get offended. I wasn't quite sure why Emmett considered Chinese cuisine food for homosexuals, but I did agree that it would be unsatisfying for the evening. Besides, Sully's had a burger named after Bella and it always mollified Edward. He always ordered it, but I couldn't deal with pineapple on my burger.

"Fine," Edward agreed. I wanted a blueberry shake anyway.

"You boys be good," Esme said. "And keep him away from Chief Swan's tonight," she said pointing at Emmett and me, "I don't want him to get shot because he's bugging that poor man too much."

"Will do, Mrs. Cullen," I agreed.

"Mom, I've told you that Charlie and I get along just fine, now," Edward rolled his eyes. "Thanks to dad, though. You really won him over by flying Bella home."

"It was nothing. I had a friend who owed me a favor. Didn't cost me any more than flying you over there to begin with," Dr. Cullen waved off the compliment. It seemed I wasn't the only one who thought he was such a good guy.

Twenty minutes later we all squashed into a booth inside the tiny joint that was mostly deserted because it was almost closing time. The woman who ran the joint, Sue, was sweet on Charlie and right now that meant she was sweet on Edward, too. So she just made our food and cleaned around us. She said we could stay as long as we wanted to.

"So, you were telling us about that date of yours last week. You haven't talked about that chica since," Emmett said taking a bite of one of his three burgers.

"We still talk," I said. The Bree/Riley debacle had been a topic I was happy to elude all week. Bella made that very easy by coming back broken. I guess I should let the guys in on it so they didn't say something really stupid to Alice who had thrown herself into taking care of Bella after the whole ordeal.

"So you did go on that date?" Edward asked.

"Yes," I sighed, "and it was a disaster." I might as well fess up to all of it.

"Bree and I have been talking for a few weeks. She's had a really shitty life and we could really relate to some things."

"You're life isn't shitty, is it?" Edward asked.

"Dude!" Emmett said making a swipe for him from across the table. "You can't just ask him if his life is shitty. He's a fucking foster kid!" I had to laugh at that. Edward was asking because he was sincerely interested. I didn't take offense to his question. But I had to smirk at Emmett's callous attempt to be sensitive.

"I'm not a foster kid and I don't have a shitty life," I replied to both of them. "I've just seen some disturbing shit and so has she."

"How'd you meet her anyway?" Emmett asked.

"She _is_ a foster kid and she was sent here to Forks for a clean start. Someone in charge of her thought that a small, sedate town would be good for her. Her foster parents brought her to the Pop's church and Alice and I were told to fellowship her." There was a lull in the discussion while we all hunkered down into our food for a bit. I was hungry, too. Edward took the opportunity during the momentary verbal silence to try to sack tap me but I moved fast enough and Edward's hand slammed against the hard particle board of the booth seat.

"Fuck!" Edward said shaking his hand and Emmett guffawed again.

"A man's gotta be faster than that if he wants to touch my junk," I said smiling then pulling frozen blueberry goodness through the straw into my mouth. But, I didn't want to think about some man touching my junk while I was sucking on a straw.

"What about chicks?" Emmett asked. "You're always moving that fast, no wonder no one's played with your junk." It was true that I wasn't very experienced with the ladies. But I wasn't bothered by it either. All good things to those who wait, I believed that.

"Anyway," I continued, ignoring Emmett's playful dig at me, "we started talking on Wednesday night church meetings and we exchanged numbers and we've been talking."

"And texting," Edward added. He remembered that night of his Tanya date.

"Yeah. She's damn smart and fucking funny. I was smitten," I admitted.

"Dude, she's like fourteen," Emmett accused.

"She's fifteen, almost sixteen. She's a freshman because of all the shit she's been through," I explained. "We didn't talk about the dark shit, but she knew I understood so she seemed to feel pretty comfortable with me."

"So, when did it all go south?" Emmett asked through a mouthful of fries and onion rings he'd just drug through his massive vat of fry sauce. Disgusting idiot.

"Well, Alice has been talking to this Riley kid from her dance class. He pursued her pretty hot and heavy. He even asked me one night when I was there to pick her up if we were dating. He didn't believe me, though I don't know why. So, I told Alice set up a double date."

I took another bite of my burger and wiped my hands. Edward was paying attention and knew a sack tap was coming and tried to slide over to miss the impact, but he was against the wall. I'd considered that and I hit my target regardless.

"Ed, you suck at this game!" Emmett bellowed. Edward pouted while he rubbed himself.

"We're going to ruin Bella's sex life if we don't lighten up," I admitted and Emmett laughed even harder.

"I still don't get why you guys think this is so funny," Edward said.

"That's because you suck at it, you pussy," Emmett said. "You must be pretty good at fucking because Bella keeps coming back for more despite you being a tall, walking vagina."

"Shut the fuck up!" Edward hissed looking over toward the kitchen door where Sue was probably cleaning something.

"Anyway," I went on with my tale trying to pull the idiot's attention back to my story so I could get this over with, "Mops dropped Alice off at dance class the day of the date and she was going to use the showers at the studio and change there. Riley would already be there."

"Tell me why you call her _Mops_, again," Emmett said.

"Because, asshole, he knew she wasn't his mom and she insisted that Mrs. Brandon was too formal to be used by someone who was family. Don't you remember anything?" Edward asked. "Mr. Brandon is already Pops, so he made it rhyme."

"Fuck, sorry, asshole," Emmett returned. "I can only hold so much information. Right now I choose football plays, calculus, and physics formulas. Oh, and important dates to Rosalie."

"That is a smart man," I said to Edward pointing to Emmett. The giant doofus smiled back at me and I almost melted at the dimpled bastard. He really was just a big playful puppy who really never understood how big he was growing.

"Go on," Edward said annoyed.

"So I picked up Bree and we headed toward PA. She understood it was a date. We'd actually shared a few…moments…before I asked out on the date." I didn't elaborate and Emmett wasn't having it.

"What do you mean _moments_?" He made air quotes with is fingers.

"I mean I got a base hit and we spent a little bit of time on first." That was all I was going to offer. Bree's lips were soft and she smelled nice. I liked when she sighed when I kissed her neck. I liked being that close to someone. I liked feeling her warmth and her trust. She trusted me. That was the reason I didn't push her any further. I didn't want to ruin what felt honest and even innocent.

"That's all we get?" Emmett asked.

"Yep," I answered in a deadpan voice.

"Fine, what else happened?" Edward pressed. He was a slow fucking eater. He picked up his burger and took a pansy assed bite. I grabbed some fries off his plate and he slapped at my hand. Idiot. Fuckin' eat faster.

"Well, we talked, laughed, and we were having a great time. It was easy and relaxed and she even held my hand in the car. We met Riley and Alice at the restaurant. Alice was her normal bubbly self and Riley seemed to really be taken with her. Dinner went fine. We all talked about movies and TV shows. We ordered dessert and Alice went to the bathroom. While she was gone, Mops called me to check on things. I got up from the table and went to the front lobby. I'd been talkin' for a few minutes when I saw Alice go back to the table."

"So she really is as controlling as Alice says?" Edward asked. Alice did have a tendency to exaggerate, which, ironically, she picked up from Mops, but this was not one of those areas.

"Yes, but it's well meant. She just worries. Mops knew how much it would annoy Alice if she called her directly and I really don't mind. I like knowing someone's looking out for me."

"Makes sense," Emmett agreed. "Though I see why Alice gets irritated. I'm glad it a'int me." I understood it too.

"Riley'd been talking to Bree across the table, I'd been watching. She looked uncomfortable. But when Alice came back Bree looked relieved so I quit worrying about it. I could see Alice asked where I was because Bree pointed and Alice turned around to look at me. Riley turned around to look at me, too. Alice shrugged like she does; you know her 'what the hell?' shrug." They both nodded because they knew. "I wrapped it up with Mops and headed back over and tried to hold Bree's hand again and she wasn't having it."

I shoved the last bit of burger in my mouth and marveled at Emmett's ability to consume condiments when he stole the rest of Edward's fry sauce. I handed mine over because the idea of ketchup and mayonnaise mixed just disgusted me. I finished chewing and took another drink of the sweet nectar that was Sully's blueberry shake and finished up my story.

"After dessert, Riley and Alice disappeared for a little bit. I assumed that Alice was trying to get a good night kiss. We'd actually discussed this and we were going to meet at the car. We'd determined that she'd need a twenty minute window and if it didn't take that long she'd text me."

"Alice is a planner," Edward agreed. Emmett and I chuckled.

"I tried to get Bree to tell me what was wrong, but she wouldn't tell me. I know it was something he said to her, but she still won't tell me. We still text, but she basically said we couldn't see each other anymore and she's been moved from Forks," I said.

"And, Alice?" Edward asked. "What about her and Riley?" I laughed and rubbed my chin.

"That dickhead told Alice that he was sorry but he didn't want a romantic relationship to mess up their dancing relationship. That was _after_ he shoved his tongue down her throat and copped a feel. And she confessed to him that she really liked him."

"What an asshole!" Emmett bellowed. "Let's go find this fucker and beat the shit out of him. If he's some pansy-assed pussy dancer I bet Edward could even take him by himself."

"Fuck off, Emmett," Edward returned. "But he's right, something needs to be done about him. He can't get away with it. Is Alice okay?"

"Alice is fine. She says she didn't do anything she regrets and she and Riley were never partnered for dances anyway. She's too short for him. I do want to find out what he said to Bree, though. I miss talking to her." And I did. We still texted quite a bit, but it was different. It was no longer personal. And, now that I knew what it was like to be that physically close to someone, I craved it.

"So now you can finally hook up with Alice," Emmett said. My heart flopped a little bit at the thought. I never let my mind go there. And if it did, I never let it stay there. Ever.

"Yeah," Edward agreed, "we all know it's just a matter of time. Just do it already and put us all out of our misery."

I had to nip this shit in the bud. There were good reasons I didn't dwell on this. My feelings for Alice ran deeper than either of these two idiots could even fathom feeling. I wasn't going to fuck it up with a bunch of hormonal driven physical shit that would do nothing but alienate me from the people who took me in when I had nothing and possibly ruin the most important friendship of my life. Bella and Jake fucked up when they decided to use each other as adolescent sex toys and it was affecting both their friendships and their other romantic relationships.

"Look here, fuckers," I said in my low serious tone that made both of them look at me. "You need to quit with this me and Alice shit and quit it now. It a'int never going to happen while I am living under their roof and if any suspicion of it gets back to Mops and Pops they'll kick me out of their house without thinking twice. I a'int gonna fuck up the best thing that's ever happened to me. Do you understand me?" Both of them just nodded slightly. "So this banter that you two think is so fuckin' funny does nothing but jeopardize my living situation and weaken the tenuous hold I have on some pretty repressed shit."

I added that last part because both of these idiots knew I felt more for Alice than I let on. I wasn't that good of an actor. I could be pretty stoic, but Alice was just so…Alice. There were times I just couldn't contain my awe of her. And I could never be that far away from her, ever. The latter I could pass off as being her brother. The other I only let slip in our small group of friends.

"So you admit," Edward started and Emmett swiped at him again, his large hand making contact with Edward's head.

"He admits nothing," Emmett growled. Emmett many not remember why I call Mops by that title, but he understood the veiled meaning of my last declaration. I was grateful for that idiot.

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><p><strong>AN: Next up is Nessie.  
><strong>


	9. Chapter 9 Nessie

**A/N: For those of you hanging in there, I think I'm getting better. Again, I may pull the whole thing down and start over. I may not. It really does help to hear what you think...both good and bad.**

**As always, thanks to MarinaNamaste for her beta thoughts. She keeps me going when I get distracted. Go read her stories. They're excellent!**

**Here's Nessie:**

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><p>The party was in full swing at the Cullens when we arrived. I thought it was just going to be the gang, but Rosalie texted me that it got a little bit out of control. Mike had overheard Emmett talking about it in class and he showed up with two girls and some guy named Eric. So Jake invited Quill and Embry, and maybe Seth who was with some girl that, I think, he was on a date with. Bella's friend Angela and her boyfriend Ben came just so it could be less awkward for her. She wasn't into big crowds and being in a wheelchair didn't help her anxiety.<p>

I'd never been in the Cullen's _pool house_ before, and I didn't really know what to expect, size wise, from a pool house. I hoped we all fit. When I saw it I realized it was just as big as a house back on my rez that sheltered a family of six. I couldn't begrudge the doctor on how he spent his money. He did work hard for it. But, seriously, who has a pool house? In Washington

"We're staying over tonight, so I'm gonna to get wasted, kay?" Jake asked unbuckling his seat belt. He really was asking my permission. He'd stay sober-ish if I asked him to. Dr. and Mrs. Cullen had driven Bella's mom to the airport and decided to make it into a weekend trip to Seattle. So the core group was going to stay in the pool house. I wasn't sure how we were going to convince the other people to get lost. Whatever. I was happy just to party somewhere other than Jake's garage. The kids in Forks finally figured out that they could store their booze there and no one carded Emmett or Jake on the rez—Jake because they knew him and Emmett because he looked twenty-one. That little shack held a lot of great memories, but I needed a change of scenery.

"Sounds great. You don't mind if I partake, do you?" I unbuckled my own seatbelt and let it slide seductively over my breasts and his eyes followed the belt's path. I leaned over for a kiss and he obliged. God, I loved this man. His lips were soft and his tongue playful. He loved to tease me with that thing and I loved being teased. He was in a playful horny mood, not just a horny mood; and both were equally fun for different reasons. He got me off either way so it was a win/win. The question was just going to be where. Playful meant it could be anywhere. Plain horny meant soon.

"Not at all. We can lower those inhibitions," he growled. His hand cupped my breast and his thumb teased my nipple. He was such a boob man. But I was a sucker for abs and, damn, did my man have them.

"Baby, when have I been inhibited with you?" I asked when his lips dipped to my throat. We'd christened every corner of his shed. I just could not get enough of that man. I gasped as his other hand slid up my skirt and parted my legs. His fingers found my magic spot through my undies.

"Touché," he breathed into my ear while he continued to rub little circles around my clit. Fuck. I was panting. "If we don't get out of this car right now," he nipped my earlobe, "we'll never make in in there and everyone will know what we're doing out here." And he stopped. Fuck! I hated it when he did that. He could just stop and he left me all—hot and bothered.

"I hate you," I moaned but the desire dripping from my voice told him otherwise.

"No you don't," he smirked his little dimply smile at me. "You love me," he kissed me softly, "and you love the antici-pa," he flicked my nip, "—tion" his hand moved up to cup my face, "to leave you like…" he sucked by bottom lip, "this."

"I'm going to remember that next time I decide to," I looked down at the bulge in his pants, giving my head a little ambivalent flick to the side, "you know…" I let that hang in the air and got out of the car. It was his turn to groan. I could be as ornery as him and he knew that.

I suspected that high school parties were the same where ever you go in the world—a reservation out east or in the Pacific Northwest. The music was coming through the stereo system, but it was controlled through the satellite on the huge flat-screen TV. Okay, that was different. That was some swanky shit. I looked around, bobbing my head to the thump of the bass. Jake's hand was on my ass as we surveyed the room from the foyer.

The party was exactly what I expected—a room packed full of teenagers trying to be the center of attention. Except for Bella. Though, she looked a bit more unfettered than normal. I could hear her from the corner where she sat in her wheelchair. I pecked Jake on the cheek and went over to say hello. Jake headed over by the guys who looked like they were doing shots.

"Hey, Bells!" I called over the din of laughter and music. I heard a gaggle of giggling girls sitting near the television but ignored them for the moment.

"Hey Ness!" She reached up out of her chair and pulled me into a hug. She was in a pair of her favorite skinny jeans, a bowling shirt with the name _Dimitri_ embroidered on it, and a converse sneaker on her good foot.

"Isabella Marie Swan! Have you been drinking?" I asked with the pride seeping through my mock shock.

"Yes I have," she announced proudly. "My mother told me I was a stuck-up snob and I needed to let loose a little bit. And I finally found something with alcohol that doesn't taste like shit." She held up a bottle of Mike's Hard Lemonade.

It'd been two weeks since Bella came back from Florida with three broken ribs, a broken leg, and more bruises than a Mexican, midget boxer. But it looked like sitting in a wheel chair and two bottles into her night she wasn't feeling much pain. Angela and Ben were sitting next to her and after introductions I determined that Angela was looking after Bella rather well. I decided to go find my own beverage.

I did a loop around the room and found Rosalie at the bar. "Nessie!" she exclaimed. Yep, it was evident that she'd been there a while, too. "Edward you remember Nessie, right?" She handed me a bottle of the lemonade that Bella was drinking. That was different from the generic beer and tequila I was used to drinking.

"I sure do. I'd like to apologize for that first night that you met me," he said offering me his hand and I switched my drink to my left hand. I took his proffered hand and he shook it heartily. What time did these people get started anyway? I knew we were late, but damn. I thought I better stay relatively sober just to make sure they didn't hurt themselves. "Jake told Bella that you heard our little spat on the beach. I was a complete douchebag back then." He smiled and it transformed his face. That's why all the girls creamed themselves over him.

"I wouldn't say douchebag, Edward," I smiled back. Even though that was exactly what I said at the time. "I'd say controlling asshole." _Back then?_ I wondered to myself. That was like a month ago.

"And that's why Jake loves you!" he yelled and then burped. "Which is why I love you and can stand to be around Jake. Thank you, Nessie, for being you. And allowing me to be around Jake and not wanting to punch his stupid, perfect, smiling mouth every five seconds. Bells…" he scoffed. "Pfth. How the fuck did he come up with that genius nick name?" he muttered to himself, only it wasn't very quiet. His words weren't slurred, but you could tell they were, like Bella's, the freed expressions of unbound inhibitions.

"Shit, man," Emmett said to Jasper, "how much did you put in there?" pointing at Edward's red solo cup. I hadn't met Jasper yet. I figured he must be the tallish guy with wiry brown hair.

"I put enough in there to make him honest and then threatened to punch his nuts if he didn't drink up," Jasper smirked. He turned to me, "Renesmee, it sure is nice to meet you finally. Alice hasn't stopped talking about you since last weekend." I liked him right away. I have no idea why, but my instincts are usually never wrong.

"It's nice to meet you, too. And I like this new, honest Edward. So thank you." Edward finally let go of my hand and there was some idle chit-chat about school and stuff. I was enjoying my bottle of Mike's Hard Lemonade. I downed half a bottle before I even realized it. I grabbed another before Rosalie took me off to see Alice.

The girls' night we had at Bella's last weekend was about the most fun I'd had, sans Jake, since I got here. He was out goofing off with his rez friends who complained that he was spending too much time with the palefaces so I decided to join the girls. Bella told us all about Florida and James and her reconciliation with Edward. Rose told us all about pushing the limits with Emmett and her plans for his Christmas present which includes a very skimpy Santa costume. And Alice told us all about Riley and Bree. She really didn't seem all that sad about it, though we could tell she was upset about something else. I was going to see if I could get to the bottom of that soon.

"Ness!" Alice squealed and reached up to hug me. She really was rather short. "I see you brought the brown boys with you. They will definitely make some girls happy." Quill and Embry were more than happy to come up and check out the girls. On the rez they were goofballs, here they were exotic. They were hoping to get lucky.

"And our guys, too," Rose added. "Tanya only showed up to make life hell for Bella, but Quill or Embry might be a nice distraction for her. I'll see what I can encourage them to do."

"Seth will be here a little later. He's driving his dad's old car," I reported.

"Isn't he only fifteen?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, but no one down there cares," I returned. "Besides, all those boys are cozy with Bella's dad—as long as they're not breaking the law or doing something dangerous." Everyone just nodded.

A big round of cheers came from the circle of boys who were, indeed, doing shots around the kitchen island. Jake looked over at me and winked.

"Shit girl, he loves you," Alice said catching his sexy eyes at me.

"I know," I giggled and returned his wink. "So tell me about all these people," I said pointing to the couch. "I know y'all have the digs and I want to be prepared." Alice's eyes widened with delight and she was off.

"So, Mike came with Jessica, but brought Tanya along too. I think he's hoping she'll cause a scene about their one date that Edward ended way too abruptly for her taste. She's been ragging about it all week to Lauren who's been unloading to Rosalie." She pointed to Mike and Tanya. They looked just like they'd been described to me last week—two yuppie wanna-bes with a generic sense of style. Rosalie was right when she said it was like an Abercrombie & Fitch store had mated with the Gap and then vomited on them.

"Where's this Lauren? I really want to get a load of her," I said looking around.

"She's on a date with Tyler and she's hoping to get lucky tonight in his car," Rose rolled her eyes.

"She's so dumb," Alice said. "She could have come here and totally snuck into one of the bedrooms."

I didn't know if that was better. What if someone walked in? Who was I to judge though? I'd fucked Jake six ways from Sunday in his garage when anyone could have walked in. But we knew all the places that would conceal us pretty well if we were caught unawares.

"And Jessica? Where's she?" I asked. Alice and Rose looked around and they both smiled.

"In the corner with Quil trying to make Mike jealous," Rose said.

"Oh, she just pulled the one fingered cheek stroke," Alice dished watching Jessica's moves and Quil lapping it up like a dog.

"And there goes Mike to stop it," Rose commented. It was like being at a sporting event with colorful female commentators. Another round of cheers came from the group doing shots and that reminded me that I had a bottle. It was pretty good and didn't taste too much like alcohol. I finished it off and opened the next.

"So, Mike's here hoping Tanya will make Bella mad at Edward—even though Bella knows about the date and forgave Edward for it—but he's jealous if Jessica flirts with someone else?" My mind just reeled with this information. I couldn't live in this world. I looked over and Jake and was just grateful that we didn't play games like that.

And he was fucking sexy.

He looked over at me as if he felt my gaze. I puckered my lips at him and then licked my bottom lip. I knew how much he liked that. He proceeded to gyrate his hips a few times into the island he was standing in front of. Yep, he was in playful mood. It made all my girly parts throb. I wanted him to do that on me.

"So fucked up, right?" Rose was saying. Her attention was still on Mike, Quil, and Jessica. "I like you guys so much better." I looked over at her and her big eyes were sincere. "You guys are so much easier to be around. God, thank you for that!" The sincerity of her statement actually tugged on my heart a little. I wasn't used to it. I took a swig from my bottle. The stuff was good and didn't hurt going down.

"Oh, we love you, too, Rose!" Alice cooed. Things were getting a little heavy so I took another long pull on my lemonade and conversation turned trivial again. We chit-chatted a little more and then we moved over the check out the shot circle going on at the kitchen island. The guys were all talking about video games and sports and we all got bored pretty quick.

"Edward help me onto the couch, please. I'm tired of sitting in this fucking chair," Bella called from the other side of the room. It looked like she'd finished bottle number three. Angela had rolled her over towards the couch. "Angie and Ben are leaving," she pouted. "I hope you feel better soon, Ben." Edward rushed over to her in response. I grabbed another bottle of the lemonade and twisted off the cap. This lemonade stuff was pretty good and I was feeling pretty good after drinking it. I followed Edward over to the sitting area.

"Bella, I don't think…" she stopped his protest with a look. I smiled to myself because she had really made some changes. "Okay," Edward acquiesced, "I just don't want you to be uncomfortable." Maybe he _had_ changed in that short of time. I saw his eyes flash towards Tanya.

"I'll tell you when I am," Bella said and smiled at him. "Now put me on the effing couch." He smiled at her and it lit up his face. It was like Bella was treating him…normally…and he liked it.

I saw Tanya eye Bella as Edward helped her to the couch. She was sitting on the love seat with Jessica now and Mike was standing behind them. Quil was sulking from the fireplace and talking to Embry who was staring daggers at Mike.

"And just who might you be?" Mike said almost leering at me. My stomach turned a little. I brought the bottle to my lips to hide my disgust.

"I'd be Nessie," I said after taking a swig. I thought about having a little bit of fun flicking a quick glance towards Jake who was downing another shot in the kitchen. "Who might you be?" I tried to smile coyly. I must of have done it right because Mike's eyes widened infinitesimally and Jessica eyes flashed with anger. These two were seriously fucked up.

"I'd be Mike," he smiled. I'm sure he was trying to be smooth. It was passable. "I haven't seen you around before. Did you come with the rez kids?" Ah. What a fucking moron. I was paler than the Quileute kids, but my skin was still red and so was my blood. These people looking down on us were beginning to irritate me.

"What would make you say that?" I loved watching him squirm. If he said anything about my skin color, it'd make him seem culturally insensitive. I loved playing on the white guilt of imbeciles.

"Ah, uh," he stammered looking for words, "I, uh, just figured if you didn't go to school in Forks, you uh, might be from La Push." I smirked at him and took another drink. Edward had Bella all situated on the couch and she had finally turned her attention to us.

"Yeah, Mike, she's Jake's girlfriend. You remember Jake, don't you? He's the one who went with us to the movies that one time in PA and you tried to hold my hand and then you got sick in the bathroom and when you came back Jake and I were making out and you got all pissed off and you left until you realized that Jake had driven and you had to ride home with us anyway?" Bella giggled. Edward coughed, but smiled. "You remember that?" She was talking _really_ loudly.

"Oh, that was you?" I asked. "Jake told me that story," I added winking at Bella. I wanted all these bitches to know that there were few secrets in this room between us friends and their attempts at sabotage would be futile.

"So you know about Jake and Bella?" Jessica sneered, her eyes flicking to Edward and back at me.

"Yeah," I said and held her gaze until she was uncomfortable. "So, fuck you," I added under my breath when she looked over at Tanya for a few seconds.

"And you're okay with it?" she asked after a few awkward moments.

"Okay with what?" I asked. I hated it when catty bitches tried to make uncomfortable situations out of innuendo and half-truths. I found that the best way to handle it was to beat them at their own game.

"With them dating?" she asked slowly as if I was an idiot.

"I don't understand the question," I said. Again, an awkward silence hung in the air as they expected me to be shocked at the revelation that my boyfriend had a life before he met me.

"She means, doesn't it bother you to be around Bella knowing that she and Jake have a past?" Tanya clarified in a very condescending tone.

"No," I said. "Bells, we still coming over for dinner tomorrow? It's spaghetti night, isn't it?"

"Sure as shit!" Bella called holding her bottle up. "I'm making garlic bread! JAKE!" she called and he turned towards his best friend's call.

"What?" he called back just as playfully. I looked at Edward who was sitting on the arm rest next to her. She had hold of his hand with both of hers.

"Tell Billy to make sure that sauce isn't scorched this time if he wants to watch the game on a decent TV," she called back over to him. She looked up at Edward, "it was so gross last time and I just couldn't eat it." He smiled down at her. The pair of them drunk was actually kind of pleasant.

"Don't worry, Bells. I got it tomorrow. Billy won't ruin the sauce and Jake won't make him late," I said. I turned back to the bitches who were watching this like a tennis match. "Does it look like there are problems?"

"Let's play _I've never_," Tanya suggested in an acerbic tone. I suppose the diversion tactic was as good as an answer as I was going to get. She was beautiful with her long blonde hair. She wore a pair of fitted women's chinos and a shirt that didn't quite meet the low slung waistband when she was standing. It was totally inappropriate for the cold weather outside. But I guess girls like Tanya can't be concerned with weather when there are relationships to destroy.

"What's that?" I asked feigning innocence. No need to tip my hand. Let them think I'm a backwoods Indian who doesn't know anything. It's better if your opponent underestimates you.

"Where are you from?" Tanya asked with some contempt lacing her voice despite her smile. Could the movies have gotten this right? Was she really just a mean girl? I guess it was no different where I was from. Alcohol only fueled the mean fires and then we all used the firewater as the excuse for our actions. It was convenient.

"It's a drinking game where one person announces something they've never done and if you've never done it either, then you have to take a drink," Jessica prattled on like Tanya hadn't spoken.

"I'll play." I said as I felt Jake step up behind me and wrap his arm around my waist. His breath was hot on my neck and I melted into him for comfort and support. And he'd been turning me on all night.

"You okay, baby?" he whispered in my ear. Damn what he could do to me. He knew what he was doing to me because then he dropped three kisses on my neck while pulling me against his raging boner that my body was concealing from the rest of the room.

"Yes," I answered, shooting a look to the blonde bitch whose face was puckered up like prune. She was totally jelly that I had hot man grinding himself into my ass. "We're going to play a drinking game. You in, Thunder Boy?" I asked. I spun in his arms and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I'm in," Bella called from the couch and Edward's jaw dropped. "I need another bottle of this shit, though. It's fuckin' awesome! What?" she asked when she saw him gawking. "I think everyone's right and I need to loosen up a bit. Can you get me another one of theeeeese, please?" she asked and smiled up at her boyfriend. He was a goner for anything Bella wanted. Mike took that opportunity to sit on the sofa next to Bella. Tanya elbowed Jessica and pointed to Mike, so Jessica jumped up and sat next to him. It seemed this was all planned. I thought I'd throw a wrench into it.

"Come on, baby," I cooed into Jake's ear. "Let's go sit down before there aren't any seats left. I tugged Jake's arm and pushed him down next to Tanya and then climbed on his lap. "You don't mind, to you?" I asked smirking as she moved over to make more room.

"Well actually," she started but she was cut off by Jasper and Alice pulling up more chairs. Rosalie was grabbing Emmett who grabbed the rolling cooler that had all the booze. Quill and Embry, who had wondered over to shot table with the other guys after Jessica's aborted flirting, joined the large circle.

When Edward returned, he sent a scathing look at Mike, but Emmett whispered something in his ear and Edward just took a seat across from the couch where Bella was chatting happily with Alice sitting on the arm rest.

"I love this game," Rosalie said sitting in a chair next to Alice and clapping her hands together, practically rubbing them like a villain from a bad vampire movie. Rose knew the digs on the bitches and could probably create some _I nevers_ that would embarrass them. Bottles and beverages were distributed to all those who needed them and there was a little discussion as to who would begin the round.

"I'll start, dammit!" Bella declared and then giggled. I'm not sure whether it was that Bella was no longer worried about pleasing Edward all the damn time, the alcohol, or a combination of the two, but Bella had really let down her inhibitions. "I've never skipped class, not ever. I'm going to have to try that someday." A round of cheers and laughter filled the pool house as almost no one took a drink including myself.

"You only have four fucking classes!" Emmett called.

"Whatever! I still have to try it when I can walk again," Bella promised herself.

"My turn," Mike claimed from next to Bella, "because that was lame." Was he trying to impress her? This guy had no game.

"It is not," Alice objected. "It goes clockwise you idiot."

"What?" Mike asked. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." Alice was about to respond when the door opened and Seth walked in with his date.

"Hey everyone," he greeted, "sorry we're late. My sister wouldn't shut up and she talked Bree's ear off." Seth moved to the side to introduce his date. "Everyone, this is Bree Tanner. She's living with us for a while." Bree was a small little thing with mousy brown hair and clothes that had seen better days. She was staring at Alice wide-eyed when Jasper's gasp caught my attention.

"You didn't tell me that," Jasper's voice sounded tight and a little miffed. The girl's eyes flew to the sound of his voice and she squeaked.

"I didn't know until this morning," she said, briefly flashing Jasper a look I couldn't interpret before lowering her gaze and answering the floor.

"This is Bree?" Emmett said through a dimpled smile. "With Sethie?" I wanted to smack him. He had _no_ filter. Bree looked mortified that people knew who she was. Rose stepped in and shut him up though.

"Bree, it's nice to finally meet you. Alice and Jasper have both said how much they've missed you," Rose said, flashing a welcoming smile.

I sure did like her.

"Have a seat!" Edward called. The only two places left were chairs in between Jasper's and Tanya who was next to me on the loveseat. Seth led the way taking the furthest in next to Tanya, leaving Bree next to Jasper. Jasper's eyes looked pained and I had no idea why. It was obvious that they knew each other and that something was not right. Tanya was eyeing Bree's clothes and I saw her look at Jessica and flash a look of disgust. It did not go unnoticed by Bree and anger flared in my gut.

"I'll go next," I announced. "Get those two something to drink." I pointed at our new arrivals. Quill was filling them in on what we were doing while handing them two bottles from the cooler he was sitting on. "I've never kissed Edward Cullen." I wanted to get this shit out in the open before Tanya had a chance.

"I'm glad I don't have to take a drink for how many times I've kissed him," Bella giggled. "I'd have to drink everyone's drink!"

"Not me," Rose said, "I've only kissed him once. And so has Emmett apparently," she giggled looking at her boyfriend's beer which was untouched.

"What?" Embry asked looking shocked and scandalized.

"It was a dare at one of these fuckin' parties," Emmett blushed.

"What about you, Tanya?" Jessica asked. "I noticed you didn't take a drink." I was about to cut in when Bella interjected.

"Oh, that's because she attacked him while I was getting into a car accident in Florida," she announced. "She thought that Edward could forget about me if I was far, far away." Bella _really_ couldn't hold her liquor. "It didn't work," she whispered loudly, her hand cupped over the side of her mouth towards Tanya like it was a secret. I looked over at Edward who, while looking just a little shocked, also appeared a little pleased. "Did it baby?" she smiled drunkenly at him.

"Nope. She can't hold a candle to you," he said toasting his bottle towards her. He looked back over at Tanya who looked like she'd swallowed a pickle whole. "Thanks for helping me figure that out, too. Bells," he whispered loudly to Bella, "maybe Mike will catch a fucking clue now and leave you alone." I giggled both because he used Jake's nickname for her _and_ because Mike was just an asshole and he deserved that. "I'm next," Edward declared in a normal tone. "I've never kissed Mike Newton!"

I burst out laughing when Bella lifted her bottle of Mike's Hard Lemonade to her lips and drank half of it down. Embry burped when he finished off his beer.

"Alice!" Quill laughed, "I expected Tanya and Jessica, but you?"

"It was on a dare. It was the same party that Emmett kissed Edward," Alice admitted. Jasper seemed to slump lower in his chair.

"That is enough," Mike said. "Why don't we start kissing people instead of discussion who we've never kissed. Who's up for spin the bottle?"

"That is so eighth grade," Jessica sneered.

"But I could be fun," Embry said, giving Jessica the eye. She smirked back at him.

"I don't think so," Edward said hesitantly.

"Why?" Tanya asked. "You afraid your relationship won't withstand a meaningless game of spin the bottle? Are you that insecure?"

"No," Jake said, offended for his new friend, "maybe he doesn't want to taste your skank lips again." I felt his hand tighten around my waist and I just patted him to try to calm him down. He always got a little defensive when he drank. I found most men did. That's why there are so many bar fights.

"We're out," Seth said, "Bree doesn't know any of you and I don't want her to be uncomfortable."

"It's okay," Bree muttered. "It won't be so bad." Her eyes flashed to Jasper who was almost seething. I wondered what was up with him.

"Okay," Alice said getting up off the armchair and grabbing the empty tequila bottle from the kitchen island where all the boys were doing shots earlier. "Let's do this since this is the only way in hell Mike has a chance of kissing Bella and Embry has of kissing anyone." She smirked at Embry and ignored Mike's offended grunt.

"I'll go first since I was supposed to go next in _I've never_," Mike whined. What a fucking pussy. I hated him more than I disliked Edward that first night I met him.

"Fine," Alice complied handing him the bottle. Alice and Embry switched places and there was some sliding and shuffling to try to make things as boy-girl boy-girl as possible. I slid off Jake's lap next to Tanya who looked offended that I was sitting that close to her. It made me happier to offend her.

"I'm not kissing a dude, though. Do we all agree that if it lands on someone of the same gender we get to go again?"

"No!" Emmett protested. All eyes went to him. "If a chick's spin lands on a chick, they still have to kiss, agreed?" he added hope fueling his tone. Rosalie just rolled her eyes.

"You really want to go down that road?" Rose asked. "This could backfire on you later," she warned with a wry smile.

"Fine," Emmett grumbled with a dimpled smile, "no chick kissing. No matter how hot it'd be."

There were murmurs of assent and Mike laid the bottle on the table and spun it. You could tell he was trying to guide the spin and Quill made him do it again. It landed on Jasper, but since Bree was the only girl near that area, we all decided it was her.

Bree inhaled softly and licked her lips nervously. Mike got up from the couch and I was proud of him for not frowning. He actually looked a little curious. Bree remained seated and Mike leaned down and kissed her softly on the cheek. If I didn't know Mike better, I would have been touched by the sweet gesture, but he was an all-out asshole and I figured there had to be another motive.

"You're right, you don't know any of us," he whispered to her though we could all hear. "If there's a next time, though, I get a little bit of tongue." He leaned in one more time and kissed her cheek again, but it caught the corner of her mouth. I saw Jasper's hand ball up in a fist.

"See," Tanya said, "that wasn't so bad, was it?" She glared at Edward. Jasper didn't look like he agreed. "It's your turn now," Tanya said to Bree.

"Fine," Bree said. She leaned over the table and spun the bottle and it landed on Edward. Edward just looked over at Jasper who closed his eyes like he couldn't believe his life.

"And it has to be on the lips this time," Jessica whined. "Or this is just going to be stupid. We're fucking seniors in high school—we're not in junior high for god's sake."

"Bree's only a freshman," Jasper said through gritted teeth.

"It's okay, Jasper." Her voice was soft and polite.

Bree stood up and walked over the Edward. He didn't stand up because she was about his height sitting in a chair. She glanced over at Jasper—there was totally something going on there—then pressed her lips against Edward's.

"It has to be an appropriate spin-the-bottle kiss," Jessica said before either one of them could pull away. "At least five seconds."

"You are making this shit up as you go along," Jasper said.

"You might be grateful for that when it comes to be your turn. Unless you don't want your first kiss, that isn't your sister, to be in front of a group of people," Jessica returned.

Bree and Edward separated just as Alice was about to fly off her chair at Jessica and Rose caught her arm to prevent it. "Ignore her," Rose hissed. "She is _so_ not worth it." Bree hurried back to her seat, all pink and flushed. Edward must be a pretty damn good kisser.

"Your turn Eddie," Mike said.

"Okay, _Mikey_," Edward retorted while spinning the bottle a little harder than expected. When in landed on me I didn't know how Jake was going to react. Emmett just howled with laughter.

"Shit!" Emmett bellowed. "Edward may just steal another one of your girlfriends if you're not careful, Black! Whew!" I looked over at Jake who was just shaking his head and smiling.

"Fuck. I wonder how I pissed off the ancestors this time," was all Jake said. I looked at him to try to get a read on his feelings. He winked at me. My heart fluttered. He trusted me and he knew it was a game.

"How do you know I won't steal him from Bella?" I spit back at Emmett. "My mad skills might just have him panting like a dog."

"Oh, sister!" Bella called. She'd finished another bottle. "Teach him something useful. It's time I benefit from your knowledge and not the other way around." A hot jolt of anger shot through my gut as the vision of Jake and Bella kissing crossed my mind's eye, but I didn't let it take root. I couldn't let the other girls see it anyway. Bella was drunk and making light of a touchy subject. Alice and Rosalie about fell off their chairs tittering as Edward made his way over to me. I let Edward come down to my level, though I sat forward on the loveseat turning my back on Jake. He didn't need to see it, but Tanya did. I wanted her to.

Edward's face drew near to mine and he smiled. When my eyes finally focused through my lemonade buzz I could see that he was pretty fuzzy, too. How much of this would we remember in the morning, anyway? Jake was pretty wasted, as well.

"Let's show Tanya how it's done, shall we?" I asked. One side of Edward's mouth curved up in a crooked grin before I felt his bottom lip brush mine.

"Okay, Ness," he said right before both lips pressed gingerly back into mine. He smelled divine and I remembered Bella talking about his expensive aftershave that his grandfather got him for Christmas. I could taste the tequila on his breath and I must have unconsciously sent my tongue to test it because I felt his tongue brush mine softly and quickly. One of his hands came up to my cheek and I felt his thumb brush back towards my ear. I swiveled my neck to the other side so that I could see Tanya. She. Was. Pissed. Yeah, _so_ worth it. Jake would get over it; if he even remembered. Right before the kiss ended I bit Edward's bottom lip. He yelped a little and then chuckled.

"Fuck," Emmett said. "That was hot." Rosalie hit his chest and then smirked.

"Edward, if you would have kissed me like that on our date, there might have been a second," she said.

"Rose, that comment hurt more than Jasper's sack tap," Emmett gasped, pretending to be hurt.

"So?" Bella asked. She was so, _so_ wasted.

"That was nice," I said still looking at Edward who was smirking, "but I'll stick with my Jake." I wiped my mouth and turned back to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck to comfort him. That couldn't have been easy for him to watch. "I love _you_," I whispered into his ear.

"I know," he said as he clung to me. He really _did_ need the reassurance. "But Emmett was right, that was kind of hot," he grumbled into my ear loud enough for Tanya to hear. She just tutted and made Jake smile. Edward had moved back to his chair and I got up to spin the bottle. I was really hoping I got Jake. It landed on Jasper. I stood up and walked over to Jasper while Emmett, kept flapping his gums.

"So, Bells, which kiss was hotter? Edward and Bree or Edward and Nessie?"

"Dude, what the hell is wrong with you?" Quill asked trying to spare Jake's feelings. Those boys could rip each other apart, but don't let the palefaces start in on any of them.

"What?" Emmett asked. "It's a fair question for a girl who will be lucky to feel her front teeth tomorrow.

"You're an asshole," Embry said. They had both looked at Jake and I, too, was a little worried about Edward kissing me after the whole Bella thing—no matter how long it was before he met me. But, I still had to kiss Jasper.

"Knock it off, guys," I said. "I'll make it up to him later." Jasper was standing in front of me but I looked over at Quill and Embry, "just stay away from the garage for a few days." The smirk on Jake's face told me it was okay.

"You ready, Jasper. It is nice to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you," I smiled.

"Likewise," he said back. He wasn't smiling, though. I felt badly for him. He obviously knew this Bree girl. He was obviously affected by watching her kiss other boys. It dawned on me then that this was the same girl he and Alice had been out with last weekend. Bree was just an odd name, how could I have not put that together before.

Suddenly I was overwhelmed with sympathy for poor Jasper and I found I was kissing him softly and slowly. He was gentle and he tasted like malt and barley. So Jasper was a beer drinker. I didn't mind beer this way, I determined. I went in for another taste and it seemed that Jasper was at war with himself. I never knew I could feel so much in a five second kiss. He was grateful and angry, sad and excited all at the same time. I have no idea how I knew that. What I did know was that Jasper was much more capable of emotion that he let anyone know. When we broke apart I was just a little dazed.

"Wow," I said. "That was…" I paused looking for words, "an experience."

"Thank you?" he asked.

"No," I corrected, "thank you."

"Guess that kiss was better than yours Edward," Emmett belted through a laugh.

"Beginner's luck," Edward said. "That's like his second or third kiss." The bantering went on while I returned to Jacob's lap.

"You okay?" I whispered very close to his ear.

"Only if you keep your promise," he said. His hand found the skin at my waist, "about the garage."

"There's got to be a garage here," I said and planted a small peck on his neck.

"Can you restrain yourself, please," Tanya said.

"Probably not," I returned. "I'm just too hot and bothered, now." What a bitch. I wish they'd leave already. Emmett was laughing again and pulled our attention to the other side of the room where Jasper's spin had apparently landed on Bella.

When we looked over, Jasper and Bella were kissing rather enthusiastically. Edward had apparently seen enough. After the nominated five seconds were up and Jasper and Bella were still at it, new Edward had crawled away into the recesses of his inebriated mind and old, possessive Edward had come out snarling and on top of Jasper. When Bella's good leg wrapped around Jasper's hip and she pulled him closer Edward was up out of his chair.

"Shit," Jake said, pushing me off his lap and jumping to pull Edward off of Jasper. Bree looked down at the floor and Seth leaned down to ask her what was wrong. If they were dating it was the very early stages, but something told me that wasn't the case.

"What the fuck, Jazz! Spin the bottle one thing," Edward roared, "but dry humping my girlfriend in front of me is another."

"Would you rather he dry-hump her behind your back?" Mike asked trying to imitate Emmett's humor. What a douchebag.

"Edward," Jasper said, panting and looking truly mortified, "I'm sorry. Dude, I'm so sorry." Jasper looked at Alice who looked like she was on the verge of tears and then he looked back at Bree who refused to look at him at all. "Shit!" he yelled and then ran out the door.

"I'll go after him," Emmett said. Edward had followed Jasper's glances at Alice and Bree and seemed to put old, douchy Edward away and the new selfless one came back.

"No, I'll go. He, uh," he glanced at Bella who was giggling like a mad woman, "I think I'm the only one who can help in this case. Bella, are you okay?" Edward checked.

"I'm fuckin' great! My turn to spin, right?" she giggled. Damn she was three sheets to the wind.

"Honey, I think we're done playing," Rose said. "Why don't the rest of you take off? You've fucked up enough shit tonight." She gave Jessica, Mike, and Tanya pointed looks. "Go," she said a little more fiercely.

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><p><strong>AN: Read and review, please.**

**Next up: Charlie**


	10. Chapter 10 Charlie

**A/N: Hey everyone! I got my mojo back, but it's on a different story. I'm still a little ahead and plan on posting on Fridays, like I've been doing, but in a few weeks it may slow down a little. In the mean time enjoy this chapter through Charlie's eyes. **

**Again, kudos to my beta, MarinaNamaste. I lurves her so much!**

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><p>The scene was just damn depressing. I'd seen grisly scenes like this before; I wasn't a rookie. But it was different when I knew who it was that had lost so much blood.<p>

Rosalie's voice over the phone calling me to her home still haunted my thoughts during the drive to their secluded, upscale house.

"Chief?" she asked in a tone I can only describe as broken.

"Yeah, you got me," I replied, a little miffed I'd been woken at 3:00 am. "Who is this?"

"Chief, it's Rosalie Hale," she sobbed. "I need your help, please." My stomach dropped. Rosalie was a strong girl who didn't whimper and moan. If she was crying, something was woefully wrong.

"What do you need, honey. Tell me what's wrong," I commanded, suddenly wide awake.

"He's dead. They shot him after they…" her voice broke again, "after they…"

"Honey, where are you?" I asked urgently. I was out of bed and grabbing my pants while holding the phone with my shoulder. I didn't know who was dead, who was shot, who did the shooting, where she was, and why she sounded like she'd taken a beating. But I needed to know all those things. First, though, I needed to know where she was. I knew she was hurt. I could feel it in my gut. And my gut was never wrong.

"I'm at my house," she croaked. "Can you come soon? I can't think of anyone else to call. I'm sorry to bother you, sir." I pulled my shirt over my shoulders and began buttoning. I was used to doing this on the fly.

"Now don't you worry about that. That's what I'm here for," I tried to sooth her. "You just hang in there and I'll be there in a few minutes. You're at your house?" I knew where that was. I just needed to clarify. I got a clean pair of socks from the drawer and pulled them on while she gasped a few times for breath.

"Yes," she was crying full sobs. "I'm not doing too well."

"Do you need a doctor? Can I call Dr. Cullen to meet me there?" I was panicked. If someone had been shot at her house, then it was a good chance that her father was in some kind of trouble. "Is your dad there?"

"He's here," she sobbed again. "But he's…they shot him. I'm not…I'm not doing so good either. Please hurry." I had my shoes on and tied then I headed for the closet near the front door where my gun belt hung.

"I'll be there before you know it, honey. You just hang in there. You just stay put."

"Okay," she whimpered. This was not the Rosalie who worked in my office for a summer. I was flat out worried. The line went dead and I dropped the phone into my pocket. I shoved my shirt into my pants and grabbed my gun belt and buckled it around my waist. I grabbed my hat and keys and I was out the door. I dialed the phone as I headed to the cruiser.

"Chief? What's wrong?" Dr. Cullen's groggy voice was still pleasant. I needed to learn how to do that. He must be used to late night calls, too.

"I just got a call from Rosalie Hale. Somethin's up at her house. She crying an' she sounds hurt. I asked her if she needed a doctor. She said she a'int doing so hot. Do you know where she lives? Do you need directions?"

"No, I know where she lives. I'll meet you there." It sounded like he knew how to get dressed while talking on the phone, too. "See you soon."

I hung up and was halfway across Forks. I turned the cruiser's lights on, but not the siren. No need to alarm the whole town, but I was goin' pretty fast. The streets were deserted, but the lights would at least serve as a warning if other cars happened in my path.

I hadn't known what to expect, but this much blood—well no wonder she was so upset. The front door was open and I could see into the front room where the body of Mr. Hale lay, facedown, in the middle of a crimson puddle. By the brain matter exploded on the white tiles and the volumes of red congealing blood pooling around his corpse I knew there was nothing I could do for Gerry. But his daughter was alive and injured somewhere in this house; and her I _could_ help.

"Rosalie?" I called, walking around the couch, avoiding going too close to the body as to preserve the crime scene. Her body lay crumpled in a loose ball on the floor. She was wearing a white pajama top, but she was naked from the waist down. From the way she lay and the blood oozing from her body I knew she'd been raped. I moved quickly towards her. I had to assess whether or not she'd been shot.

"Rose," I tried to make my voice as soothing as possible. She jolted at my touch and her hazel eyes flew open with fear. She sat up quickly and pulled away from me.

"Charlie?" she asked as recognition flooded in and replaced the fear with sadness. Her eyes filled with tears and she began to sob anew. "I didn't know what to do or who to call." I tentatively crawled closer to her, my back shielded by the wall as I scanned what I could see of the house for the perp.

"Rose, focus on me for a minute sweetheart; where are they? Are they still here?" my questions direct and to the point. I sure didn't want to find out the hard way that whoever shot Hale was still in the house.

"No," she cried, "they're gone. They left as soon as they were done."

A part of me I hadn't even known was stretched, relaxed back in to place, knowing we were safe for the time being allowed me to move on to the girl. I had to assess her injuries. "Are you hurt? Are you wounded, too? Honey talk to me."

"No," she hiccupped between sobs, "they didn't shoot me. They made him watch and then they shot him in front of me."

"Made him watch what, honey?" I asked. Though I knew. They'd made her father watch them rape her and then shot him in front of her.

"While they all…" she sobbed again. I hated having to make her tell me again when I already knew. But I couldn't assume. I had to get the facts. "While they raped me," she ended in a whisper.

"Who, honey? Do you know who they were? Can you tell me how many?" I asked.

"There were four of them. I only knew one," she was still sobbing, but her voice took on a new tone. She was determined. That was the Rosalie I knew. "Royce King. My father set me up with him and I'd told him I have a boyfriend. He's been following me for weeks. Remember, I came in and reported it," she sobbed again. "I never thought…" she trailed off.

"Charlie?" Dr. Cullen's voice came from the foyer.

"In here," I called. I heard his footsteps enter the room.

"Goodness," he breathed out. He came around the couch and saw Rosalie huddled on the floor and I could see him putting two and two together. He carried a black medical bag just like you'd see in the movies. Dr. Cullen was a traditional man and that was mighty comforting. "Rose, honey. Let's go upstairs and have a look at your injuries," he coaxed her gently. His voice was smooth and sweet as honey and she looked up at him with grateful eyes. She trusted him instantly and she should. He was a good man and a talented doctor. His demeanor and charm aided his bedside manner which instilled trust into all his patients.

"Can you walk?" he asked. He'd already made a cursory assessment of the extent of her injuries from the scene. His eyes flashed to Mr. Hale's body. I'd have to get on that as soon as we got Rosalie sorted.

"Yes, I think so," she said trying to stand up. She didn't seem to notice her state of undress. I wasn't going to point it out and make her more self-conscious.

"Okay. Let's go somewhere I can examine you," he said stepping towards her to help. He pulled out his phone with the other hand and hit a few buttons. "Kath?" he said into his phone while helping Rosalie up. I was pulling out my own phone to call for the CSI unit. "I need you meet me at a residence to assist with a rape kit," he said in a calm, quiet, and professional voice. It wasn't typical to do a rape kit in a private residence, but with Dr. Cullen here it would be more comfortable for Rosalie. He gave the nurse the address. "How long will you be?" he asked. "Great. See you in five." He pocketed his phone again and helped Rosalie from the room.

A closer look at Hale's body revealed a shot to the knee, gut, and head. Whoever did this was not playing around. Or they were just sadistic.

The nurse showed up exactly five minutes later with the deputy I'd called on my way over. I pointed Kathy upstairs to where Dr. Cullen had taken Rosalie and told my deputy to contact the CSI team in Port Angeles and get them up here. I called the coroner to have him here to meet the team when they got here. I wanted this cleared up before daybreak so it didn't turn into a media blitz. It was going to be one of those anyway, but I didn't want them to have any gruesome pictures.

I ducked out to my curser and got out the crime scene tape, cordoning off the area around the couch, did my own sketches of the crime scene and Felix, our deputy, took pictures with our own station camera. Together we did what we could without compromising any of the evidence. It was about an hour later when Dr. Cullen and Kathy emerged on the staircase.

"We're going to call an ambulance and have her transported to the hospital," Dr. Cullen reported. "We've done the rape kit and the standard questioning." He shook his head. "Charlie, she said four men did this to her." It sounded like he was on the verge of tears. I wondered if he was like this with all his patients or if this was because this was our kids' friend.

"I know it, Doc. We're gonna get the bastards. She knows one of 'em," I said.

"And they left semen," Dr. Cullen said. That made my stomach churn. I'm glad they were idiots for our sakes because, well, it made my job easier.

"We gotta find a way to tell that boyfriend of hers. Emmett won't take this lightly. I don't want him gettin' into any trouble lookin' for revenge and what not," I said.

"Let's tell him together," Dr. Cullen suggested. "And we better do it soon. If he finds out we waited he won't trust us and we won't be able to help him at all." I knew the Doc was right. "He's at our house tonight. Can you get ahold of Edward and have him bring Emmett to the hospital? I have to get Rosalie transferred and settled."

"Sure thing. I'll get right on it," I said. The lights of the ambulance flashed through the window and Dr. Cullen was out the door to greet the EMTs that were bringing in the gurney. Kathy had gone back upstairs to help Rosalie get dressed.

It was then that I realized I didn't have Edward's number. But, I knew someone who did. I pulled out my phone again and dialed the all too familiar number.

"Bella, honey, I need you to do me a favor," I said in my most business like voice. It was late and I knew she'd be worried.

"Dad?" her voice was scratchy from sleep. It was 3am. "What's wrong? What can I do?" She was always asking what she could do. Somewhere in all the Renee bullshit, the two of us got something right. Unless she came to us naturally that selfless.

"I need you to call Edward and have him bring Emmett to the hospital. Dr. Cullen is too busy to do it himself."

"Why?" her voice was clear and alert. She was awake. "Is his mother alright? What happened?"

"Well, now don't go getting all excited yourself. But, Emmett's girl, Rosalie, she's been hurt. And I want him to have someone there when we tell him. Someone he can lean on."

"I'm coming, too," she gasped.

"Now honey, we don't need all of you down here," I didn't need that whole gaggle of friends of hers here messing around in the lobby.

"Dad," she cut me off, "I'm coming and I'll be there with Edward and Emmett in twenty minutes. I think Em is staying with Edward anyway. He usually does on the weekends." I guess they'd all know that—all her friends. That mother of Emmett's was a piece of work and anyone close to Emmett would know that. And, I knew better than to argue with Bella with that tone of voice. She might be able to calm Emmett, too.

"Okay, Bells. Just…just," I didn't how to tell her that her friend had been raped and her father killed, "it's going to be shocking for all of you."

"Dad, what happened?" she asked. I could hear her shuffling and getting dressed while she talked.

"I'll let you know when you get there. I'll let the nurse know y'all are coming and she'll direct you where to go," I instructed. We needed a nice private waiting room we could do this in. Not that there were many people in the Forks Hospital at three o'clock in the morning.

"Okay. We'll be there soon." And the line was dead. She took after her old man, in a crisis. All business.

The CSI team arrived shortly after the ambulance left. That enabled me to leave the scene in their capable hands as well as the deputy's. I drove on over the hospital with the lights flashing. In a deserted Forks in the middle of the night it only took about five minutes. I parked the cruiser and as I turned off the ignition I thought about how well she ran and that was all Emmett's doing. This was really going to be hard.

I reached the waiting room that Kathy directed me to and she told me that Dr. Cullen would be with me in a few moments. He came in shortly afterwards.

"How is she?" I asked.

"Sedated," he said and shook his head. "She insisted on giving her report before we brought her here so I thought it best let her body rest. It's taken a pretty good beating. Any thoughts on who did this?" he asked.

"Yeah. She said it was this," I opened my notepad to confirm the last name, "Royce King. She said she'd been out with him twice and he wouldn't take no for an answer. I remember she came in a few weeks ago to file a complaint that she was being followed."

"One of her father's set ups?" he asked in a low tone.

"I think so," I replied. Her father was a little too concerned with mixing his business and home lives. I knew she had gone out with Edward once or twice for the same reason.

"That's a shame," he said shaking his head. "I'll have the coroner send his report over to your office as soon as it's complete. He sent his preliminary thoughts to my tablet already." He fiddled with the thin black screen in his hands. "Looks like the shot to the knee was first, but the shot to the chest killed him after he bled for a while. The shot to the head was postmortem. Of course that's not official, but he's rarely wrong." He tapped a few more times. "Yeah, that will support the report Rose gave," he said and I cleared my throat.

"Rose claims that King shot her father in the knee to debilitate him, then tied him up while he and his three friends restrained and attacked Rose. When Mr. Hale yelled too much for King to…" Dr. Cullen's eyes closed indicating his disgust at the story he had to tell, "to…finish, well, that's when King shot him in the chest. When he climaxed he shot Mr. Hale in the head."

"Hopefully the rape kit will confirm this," I said grimly.

"Can I collect a sample from Emmett to eliminate him immediately?" Dr. Cullen asked running his hand through is wavy blonde hair. "Then there's no question about it later." I liked the Doc. He was sensible and smart.

"Yep. That'd be good. He's in the system anyway from that car incident a few years back. It'll be easy to run it and it'll cover our bases." I rubbed my chin. "We know it's this King kid and his bastard friends, we just gotta gather the evidence and cover the bases with eliminating people, too. We should get samples from Edward and Jasper too. Can you have Dr. Gerandy do that?"

"Good thought, Chief. Did you get a hold of Edward and Emmett?" he asked.

"Well, I didn't have Edward's number and you were busy so I called Bella. She's gonna come with 'em. She insisted," I explained. We both took a seat on opposite couches waiting for the kids to show up. I knew Bella would have them here in short order. "He's gonna be worried about what's to become of her. I think we better consider a plan," I said.

"Well, she'll come live with us, at our house," Dr. Cullen offered without even thinking. "We have plenty of room and I'm sure her father has a trust fund for her college."

"I'm sure he would have set that up," I agreed. Mr. Hale was very concerned with taking care of Rosalie since her mother died. What the Doc said though got my mind rollin' over something.

Reverend Brandon called me about a week ago wantin' to know about the law concernin' datin' between unrelated siblings of the same caregivers. When I pressed him, he let me know that Jasper had confided that he was pretty much in love with Alice. He confessed to the Reverend that they hadn't done anything untoward, but he was pretty sure the feelings were mutual, though undiscussed. The reverend was proud that Jasper had come to him, but he didn't know what to do because he couldn't just kick Jasper out his last year of high school. Nor did he want to. I just didn't know what to tell him.

"Doc, I might have an idea. Let me make a phone call real quick," I said.

"Well, okay," he said. "I'll go check on a few things before the kids get here."

"That's fine. Thanks, Doc." I watched him leave the room and as soon as the door closed I looked up the number in my phone. I knew it was late and call from me raised alarms. I tried to sound as calm as possible.

"Chief?" Reverend Brandon's voice was alert.

"Your kids are fine, sir." I heard him sigh in relief. "But there's been some dreadful things happen at the Hale's house. Gerry and Rosalie Hale have both been attacked and Gerry didn't make it."

"Oh, dear Lord," he breathed. "What can I do?"

"Well, I've been thinking about the situation you confided in me the other day and I think I have a solution for everyone," I got right to the point. I knew the kids were going to be here soon and I didn't want to be on the phone when they arrived.

"My situation?" he asked a little confused. "Oh," he caught on, "with Jasper. Sure. What are you thinking?"

"Well, Dr. Cullen has offered Rose a room in his house. He's a very generous man and he sees a need he can fill. And you've been housing Jasper since he was a small child. You're already used to giving that kind of love, care, and shelter. What if Rose were to come and live with you and Jasper transfer over to live at the Cullens? Wouldn't that be a better rooming situation to have to two girls sharing a house and the two boys sharing a different house?" The line was silent for a moment and I thought I heard him sob.

"Chief," he truly did sob, "you are an answer to a prayer. Yes, that would solve many problems and mend more than one heart. Though Rose is headed for some tough times, I think we can help her. Yes. And Jasper will be more than happy to help Rosalie in that way—to move into the Cullen's house. Yes." Relief laced his every word and I could tell he was truly struggling over the right thing to do.

"I'm going to propose it then and see how the idea is perceived. I just wanted to check before I offered it as a suggestion," I explained.

"No, right thing. Absolutely. What can I do for you right now? How can I help?"

"Well, just have Jasper moved by the time Rosalie is released from the hospital. Her injuries are considerable. She'll be here a while, I'm afraid."

"Of course," he said. "Given our last conversation, I think Jasper will be ready as soon as I offer the suggestion. He is really struggling to do the right thing. I couldn't be any prouder of that young man than I am. I just want him to know that. I don't want him to feel like we are kicking him out."

"If he didn't grow up in your house, would you allow Alice to date a young man like Jasper?" I asked.

"Definitely! I've been telling her that for years. And now, with his frank confession about his feelings and his demonstration of control…it's exactly what I'd want for my daughter. But people talk, and I'm in a position where—" he cut himself off. "Damn I sound pompous, don't I?"

"Well, then, you may want to consider allowing him to court Alice properly, like a young man should. Show him that he's the type of boy you'd want Alice to date. Allow them date, discreetly. Jasper is a bright young man, who obviously respects you on many levels. Tell him this move will enable him to properly express and explore his feelings for your daughter." I hoped he'd agree. I'd found when you tried to reign people in, they just kicked harder against the pricks. I learned it the hard, hard way.

"I think you're right," he agreed. "You've given me a lot to think about. Hang on, Chief." I heard him move the phone away from his mouth.

"Yes? Alice? What do you need?" Reverend Brandon's voice was muffled a bit.

"Daddy, I have such a terrible feeling. Is everything okay?" I could hear the alarm in her voice. Bella had told me once or twice about Alice's 'feelings.' Bells said Alice learned to never ignore them.

"Reverend," I said hoping the phone was still at his ear.

"Yes, Chief?"

"Go ahead and tell her Rosalie is in the hospital and bring her on down. You won't get any peace tonight if you don't. Bring Jasper, too. He'll be upset if you leave him out," I predicted.

"Alright. We'll be there soon. Thanks."

Dr. Cullen came back into room right as I hung up. He had an uncanny way of doing that…comin' in at just the right moment.

"Well, Doc, you're so generous to open your home so willingly to Rosalie. Would you consider, maybe allowing Rose to stay with the Brandon's and you takin' in Jasper?" He looked a little confused for a moment and with just a little explanation the realization dawned on him. He was quick.

"Yes, I would consider that. We'd love to have Jasper." Dr. Cullen smiled and nodded. It was about the only thing there was to smile about this terrible night.

The doors of the waiting room opened and Bella wheeled herself in on her little cart she'd switched to now that her ribs were healed. I had to laugh at the stupid thing because it looked like a little kid's bike, with four wheels, that she knelt on with her casted leg and pushed herself on with her good leg. It was really the only option since she was so uncoordinated. Crutches would have made everything worse.

Edward followed Bella and Emmett trailed behind everyone else. They all looked concerned and worried. Edward and Emmett looked around anxiously which told me that Bella hadn't told them anything at all, not even that is was about Rosalie. Emmett would have been a mess if she had.

"Dad? What's this about?" Bella asked. I was about to tell her to wait for a few moments because I wanted the Brandons to be present to get this all done at once. But just as I drew breath to state that the door opened again and Alice and Jasper rushed in followed by Reverend Brandon. Now Emmett was looking nervous.

"Emmett, have a seat son. This concerns Rosalie," I said as calmly as I could. Emmett just stood dumbfounded as all eyes moved to him.

"She's okay, right?" his voice was strong, but seeking reassurance.

"She will be, but it's going to be a while. Mr. Hale and Rosalie were attacked this evening in their home," I explained. There was a collective gasp from everyone in the room who didn't already know. Alice's lip trembled and her eyes filled with tears.

"Rosalie suffered many physical injuries, but nothing critical," Dr. Cullen interjected and all eyes moved to him. "Her father was not so lucky. He was shot three times and was dead by the time Rosalie called Chief Swan. She'll be up for visitors in a few hours, but I've sedated her so she's asleep right now."

"Shot?" Emmett parroted. "But Rosie wasn't shot?" he asked.

"No," Dr. Cullen stated firmly but didn't elaborate. He couldn't. "She'll have to tell you the rest when she wakes up. But I need you boys to go to the lab give them some samples just to rule you out so it doesn't look like we're playing favorites. Got it?" he asked.

"Samples for what?" Emmett boomed. He knew how all this worked. He'd been through the system.

"Rosalie was raped, Emmett," I said. "We need to samples to rule you out as suspects. Then there's no question."

"Of course there's not a question!" he yelled.

"So you don't have a problem giving us a sample, do you?" I asked trying to calm him down.

"Hell no! As long as you find the fucker who did this!"

"Emmett!" Bella hissed.

"It's okay, Bells," I said. "But Emmett, you have to calm down. I'll find the people who did this."

"People?" Emmett squeaked. "You mean there was more than one?" I just nodded sadly. Emmett was incensed. He paced back and forth. "AAAAAGH!" he yelled into the air. His eyes bugged out of his head and his arms flailed around looking for something to hit. I could tell he was trying to keep it together. "And I was at your house playing fucking Call of Duty!" he yelled at Edward. "I should have been with her!"

"Emmett, don't be stupid. You can't be with her all the time," Edward tried to reason.

"Yeah," Alice interjected, "it was their Daddy/Daughter date night. You _couldn't _have been with her."

"Emmett, please have a seat so we can discuss some things," Reverend Brandon said. Emmett moved to the wall and look like he was about to punch a hole right through the plaster, only to pull away, clenching and unclenching his fists before… he punched the air a few times. I was astounded at the control he was showing. When I met him two years ago after arresting him for grand theft auto, he was cocky little SOB. He had little self-control over his emotions which led him to do the stupidest and craziest things. Like steal a car. But this Emmett was much more self-possessed. Finally, he calmed down enough and sat.

"Thank you, Emmett," Dr. Cullen complimented. "When we're done talking here, I need all three of you to go see Dr. Gerandy, okay?" The three of them nodded.

"What's going to happen to her now?" Emmett asked. His neck muscles were tight and a vein surged at the surface.

"Well," Reverend Brandon spoke up, "we've been discussing some options." Alice's head whipped up to look at her father. Jasper kept his gaze on the floor. "Dr. Cullen has said that he would love to have someone come stay with him since they have plenty of room. And considering what Rosalie has been through, I think it might be easier for her to live with another woman for a while. So," he cleared his throat, "Jasper, how would you feel about going and staying at the Cullen's house until you leave for college? Then Rosalie can come live with us. She might be much more comfortable living with Alice than in a house with two other strange men."

Jasper looked up, trying gauge what the Reverend was trying to imply. His eyes were skeptical, but then they always were. Jasper had witnessed his own parents' deaths and would understand how Rosalie felt.

"I guess I could do that, if it isn't an inconvenience for the Cullens," he said looking at Dr. Cullen.

"An inconvenience?" Dr. Cullen nearly scoffed. "It'd be a pleasure," he smiled. "And maybe you could convince Edward that he should clean up after himself a little more."

"Oh, we are not even going to start this! Jasper can live in the pool house and not come in my room at all!" Edward called.

"Alice, how do you feel about this?" Reverend Brandon said looking at his pixie-like daughter.

"I think that what has happened is awful, but this would make me very happy," Alice said. Her eyes flashed to Jasper who looked back at the floor. "Jazz, we wouldn't be far apart."

"Oh, I'm not worried about that, darlin'," Jasper said. "I'm just sad for Rosie."

"Emmett?" I asked. He looked lost, like he wasn't mentally with us in the room. "How does that sound to you?"

"It sounds like my girlfriend has been raped. I don't even know how to deal with this. I gotta go," he said getting up to leave.

"Now, son, you gotta listen to me," I said. He was big. If he wanted to get past me he could—unless I shot him. "You can't go lookin' for who did this."

"Oh, I know who did this," his voice was low and menacing and full of vengeance. "I know it's Royce King and his friends. I've seen all of them. They've been taunting me. Leaving me little messages here and there."

"How do you mean?" I asked. This was interesting. This might not be as hard as I thought. "Help me do this the right way and keep you out of trouble," I pled. He looked at me with assessing eyes. Then, he made his decision.

"They've sent threating messages through snap-chat as well as texts that they thought couldn't be traced. That Paul down in LaPush is a genius with that stuff by the way," Emmett threw in. I'd have to check that out.

"Did you save any of this stuff?" I asked. I didn't know what snap-chat was.

"Does a bear shit in the woods?" Emmett asked.

"Em!" Alice hissed and her eyes flashed to her dad.

"Sorry," Emmett apologized. The Reverend just nodded.

"Yes, I saved screen shots of the snap-chats. They are caption pictures of what they were going to do to Rosalie." We had them.

"That shows pre-meditation," I stated. "That is good."

"How the fuck is that good, Chief? I knew what they wanted and I didn't protect her!" He boomed in the tiny waiting room.

"Emmett," Edward cut in, "her father wouldn't have let you help. He wouldn't have let you in tonight. This is not your fault. Let Charlie handle this. Come on, man. You called me out when I was being stupid. Now I'm going to call you out _before_ you do something stupid."

"Where's this room where I can get swabbed?" Emmett asked.

"I'll show him, Dad," Bella offered. "Alice, why don't you go get some snacks so we can wait for Rose to wake up. You know what everyone likes." Bella truly was a helper. She would know what everyone likes, too. But she knew that Alice needed to be helpful or she'd go crazy. Jasper just continued to look at the floor.

"I need to go check on Rosalie again and fill out her chart," Dr. Cullen said.

"Can I walk with you and work out some details?" Reverend Brandon asked.

"Sure thing," Doc said. Jasper stood up to follow everyone out the door.

"Son," I said pulling his attention to me. He didn't say anything, but those sharp eyes told me he was listening.

"Reverend's doing this for you, you know."

"How so?" Jasper said with a hint of bitterness lacing his tone.

"You livin' in a different place means you can be honest with yourself and others. He's granting you an opportunity to do that," I hoped he was smart enough to catch my meaning. I watched as he worked out my veiled message.

"You know what I've been _dis_honest about?" he asked cocking his head to the side.

"From what I understand, you haven't been _dishonest_ about anything. You've just been holding things back. Reverend called me about the legality of those things. I told him there wasn't anything unlawful that could happen. This unfortunate crisis has presented an opportunity for things to not be as…" I rubbed my chin and cleared my throat, "er…socially awkward if you choose to be _honest_."

He considered everything I said for a long while. "Did the Reverend say how he'd feel about that _honesty_?" Jasper asked.

"Pleased as punch; if things were done discreetly," I said. "That man's awful proud of you," I added. "It'd kill him if he thought you believed he was kicking you out for feelings that are completely natural. He said there were few men he rather see with his daughter." There, I was finally straight forward. And it struck him in a soft spot.

"Really?" he whispered.

"You livin' with the Cullens—well that's an opportunity, not a punishment."

"Thank you," he said. "I was feeling mighty low about that," he admitted. I'd always liked that kid. I liked the man even more.

"Well, now, let's see if some good can come of this mess."

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><p><strong>Review if you liked...and even if you didn't.<strong>


	11. Chapter 11 Nessie again

**A/N: We're going backwards now as I attempt a chiasmus. **

**Nessie part deux. **

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><p>"Nessie, it's good to see you," Billy Black's voice came from the end of the aisle where I was looking at snack cakes to buy. I really wanted a moon pie, but the little convenience store only had banana flavored.<p>

"Hey, Earnhart," I replied, inwardly cringing. He had to know I hadn't talked to Jake in over a week. It was killing me. But I just didn't know how to tell him everything I was feeling. "How are you doing?"

"I'm trying to maintain my composure," he said eyeing me. Yeah he knew. The guilt washed over me and all I wanted to do was crawl into a hole like the legend of the Skywoman who fell through the sky from the moon. "How are you?" his tone indicated that he knew I was not doing well and he'd know if I was lying.

"Well, look at me. How do you think I'm doing?" I asked him. I knew I looked like shit. I was wearing a dirty pair of sweats and at T-shirt that I couldn't remember the last time I washed. I hadn't brushed or rebraided my hair in almost a week and it looked like it. In fact, I couldn't remember the last time I showered.

"You're doing about as good as my son," he said in a stern voice. "Why are you doing this?" That was Billy—straight and to the point. I'd seen him pick Jake apart like that. I guess it was my turn. I deserved it.

"Doing what?" I asked trying to play dumb.

"Ness." I looked up at the disappointment that dripped from his voice. I felt the familiar sting in my eyes as they filled with tears.

"What?" I couldn't stop the one that escaped. I looked up at the ceiling.

"Whatever happened, don't shut him out. You both are miserable. Talk to him. You know how clueless he is. He has no idea what he's done so he can't apologize. But I know he's sorry."

That made me feel even worse. He hadn't done anything. It was me. It was _all_ me. And I didn't know how to tell him. So I avoided him. For almost week. Which was damn hard on this small reservation and in our tiny school.

"He didn't do anything," I tried. Another tear escaped.

"Well, I just can't believe that you would hurt someone you love so much this way, then. I just can't believe that of you," he said as his eyes became dewy as well. The knife of guilt twisted in my heart and pulled down into my gut. I knew what it felt like to be drawn and quartered. And it wasn't Billy doing it. I was doing it to myself.

_The bitter pill I swallow is the silence that I keep. It poisons me, I can't swim free. The river is too deep._

I had to quit listening to the Indigo Girls.

"I'll talk to him," I promised. If Jake was feeling a fraction of what I was feeling, Billy was right. I was being cruel. And Jake deserved better. I'd turned my phone off about three days ago so I didn't even know when he called or texted.

"When?" he pressed. Damn he was a stubborn bastard.

"Soon," I whispered.

"Nessie, I've watched him go through this before. This time might just break him and I'll be damned if I sit back and watch it happen again. I want to know when you're going to put my son out of his misery." His cold black eyes had lost their compassion. The knife tugged harder at my insides.

"I'll talk to him today. Just let me…" I looked down at myself, "clean myself up a bit." I thought I saw the corner of his mouth pull up momentarily.

"If his phone doesn't buzz in an hour there will be hell to pay," he warned. I just nodded dumbly. He was right. I needed to at least see him. "Now push me to the register so I can check out." I did as he commanded and noticed he had a can of diet Red Bull in his lap and a package of Lay's potato chips. I smiled inwardly at the old man who ate like a teenager.

I didn't get the moonpies. I just went home which was a half a block from the store. I turned my phone back on and let the notification alert sound for the ten voice mail messages and over forty texts from various people.

The voice mails were all from Jake. The first few were cheerful.

_"Hey babe. Just wanted to make sure you made it home. I miss you already. Love you."_

_"Good morning. You didn't text me back. See you at school?"_

I stayed home Friday and played sick the rest of the weekend. I had managed to avoid him most of the following days by showing up to class right before the bell and leaving right as it signaled the end of class. I mumbled something about being behind on my blog.

"_Ness, what's wrong? I don't know what I did."_

_"Ness, we have dinner at the Swan's. Are you not coming?" _That one was on Sunday.

_"Now I'm just flat out worried. Ness, please. Talk to me!"_ he begged me on Monday during lunch.

They progressively got more pathetic and each one poured salt into the gaping wound in my chest. He was never angry, though. What did I do to earn his love? I certainly didn't deserve it. I didn't even look at the text messages. I didn't have the energy.

I took a shower and it took a good twenty minutes to work the conditioner through my hair and comb the weeks' worth of knots out of it. I sat on my bed dressed in a towel and scrolled through the texts that had come in from Alice, Bella, and even Edward and Emmett. They were all worried at my silence.

So was I.

But I had promised Billy. My thumbs slowly swiped at the letters and before I could think twice I hit send. I instantly wanted to call it back. But it was gone.

"_Can we talk?_" was all I sent.

"_When?_" Came the immediate reply.

"_Give me about twenty minutes? I'll meet you at your place._" I texted knowing Billy would be gone.

"_I'll be ready,_" was his response. I spent the next fifteen minutes drying off, getting dressed, and braiding my hair. I was amazed at how much a shower could improve my mood. But it did nothing to unwind the knot that was still bound tightly in my gut. Reflecting on my life here in La Push versus my life out east just tied it tighter and tighter. I'd learned that changing geography didn't eliminate major personality defects.

Jake's house was a five minute walk from mine and I didn't want to be late. As soon as I stepped out of the door and onto the porch I realized a walk wouldn't be necessary. He was sitting on the front step.

Jake was waiting for me.

The slam of the door echoed in my ears as I searched for how to begin this conversation. Jake didn't even flinch. Nor did he turn around. The only indication that he gave that he was even aware of my presence was that his bobbing knee hesitated for a moment before it began its antsy rhythm again.

I moved toward him. The compulsion to wrap my arms around him was almost overwhelming, but I resisted. I didn't know if he would want me to touch him. I hadn't talked to him in a week. I'd totally turned my back on him. I didn't know if my arms could reach around the growing knot in my gut anyway. So I just sat down beside him—as close as I could without touching him. I could feel the heat rolling off his massive frame. God, I missed him so much.

"Hey," I said. Good start. Shit. Why couldn't I do this? This was Jake. _My_ Jake. What was I worried about? Well, I'd hurt him. That's what I was worried about. We never fought. Ever. And then I just quit talking to him. I had no idea if he'd forgive me for that. Much less for everything else.

"Hey?" he asked. His tone was full of emotion. I marveled that one word cold convey so much. He was hurt, angry, and hopeful all at the same time. "All you have to say to me is, 'Hey?'" He turned to me and his angry eyes rested on me. I couldn't hold his gaze.

"I don't know how to start," I admitted as I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my shins. I rocked back and forth a little bit. "Jake, I'm sorry."

"Are you breaking up with me?" he asked. "Just tell me now, because I can't take it anymore. I can't." God, I hated that I had caused him that much pain.

"What?" I asked. I really didn't understand the question. I didn't want to break up with him. I just couldn't believe that after I told him everything he'd want me. That's why I didn't want to talk to him. Not knowing was better than knowing for me. But for him…well Billy was right. He looked like hell.

"Are you going to _fucking_ dump me?" His voice rumbled in his chest and its venom shook my soul. His hunched shoulders pulled back and up straight and proud. Damn he was sexy and it made me feel worse. "I just need to know, once and for all," he said like he'd been working up to this for a while. His voice trembled and I couldn't tell if it was fear or anger.

"That wasn't my intention," I whimpered. The water works started again.

"Because I honestly don't know what I did. And well, Ness, I'm getting to the point where I want to tell you to go to hell." My heart dropped and then pounded in my stomach. I'd ignored him too long and stretched the limits of his love. I was really good at that. Fuck.

"Jake, no. That's not what I want. I'm just…" I didn't know how to do this. I was a walking ball of insecurity and none of it was his fault. I didn't know how to tell him that. So I just rocked harder.

"What, Renesmee? You just what?" He was angry and I couldn't blame him. I wasn't explaining myself very well at all.

"Jake, I love you," I tried. I did. I loved him so much.

"What the fuck? Then how could you do that to me for a week? Bella even treated me better than that!" I turned my head from that accusation. He was right.

"I don't deserve you," I managed to get out before a giant sob escaped. I felt him move suddenly. My head was pressed against my knees, looking away from him, but I felt his strong arms wrap around me and pull me towards him.

"What do you mean you don't deserve me?" His voice had lost its edge and was full of concern. I still couldn't look at him. If he knew what I was like inside; if he knew the thoughts I had, he wouldn't want me. "Nessie? Talk to me!" His voice was pained and full of sorrow.

"I can't!" I yelled into his chest. "If I don't say anything then, it's not final and I can pretend you still want me for a while longer." I didn't mean for the last sentence to slip out.

"Ness, let me in! Tell me what the fuck you're talking about! _Please_." He was rocking me back and forth now. I was cradled in his arms like a child. He was so strong and for the first time in over a week I felt safe. I couldn't help myself.

"Jake, I'm so sorry." I clutched him like it was the last time he would ever let me hold him. Maybe it was.

"Then make it up to me by telling me what is going on in that crazy head of yours," he said as his gentle hand wound around the back of my neck to support it. I looked into his eyes, finally. The anger was gone and all that was left was concern and pain. God I loved him.

"Okay," I acquiesced. I knew I had to tell him anyway. He deserved as much.

"Really?" he asked. He had no reason to believe me. I pulled myself up and sat myself back on the step next to him, but I left my hands on his thigh. I wanted to touch him for as long as he'd let me. He placed his large hand on mine. He _did_ want me to touch him. He didn't want me to move my hands. That gave me a little bit of hope, but I still hadn't said anything. Words could change everything.

"Yes." I cleared my throat. "Remember when we found out about Rosalie?" I asked. He just nodded. "Well that really freaked me out."

"I remember," he said. It had been a hard night for everyone. Emmett came down a few days later just to get out of Forks and all he did was sit on the couch in the back of Jake's garage and stare at the VW Golf that Jake was working on. We didn't know what to say to him. Joking was completely inappropriate. So I tried to do my homework and Jake pulled apart a carburetor.

"And I got to thinking about how I would react in that situation. You know that Rose and Em have never…you know." He nodded that he knew that Rose was still a virgin. "And she was going to surprise him for Christmas. The plan was pretty elaborate," I smiled thinking about all the details that Rose had revealed to us. She was both proud and bashful at the same time. This next part was hard for me. But I knew if I could just get through this part I could make it through the rest.

"Well, it got me to thinking about...what if she got pregnant. How would she handle that? Would an abortion be appropriate? Jake I really don't believe in that, but when I think about how it happened and what it would do to her life. I mean she's already lost her mother and now her father. Her sister wouldn't even come back for the funeral." He just listened to me, patiently. I loved him so much.

"It just seemed like that would have been her only viable option. I mean there's always adoption, but I wouldn't want her to carry that reminder around for nine months. The more I thought about it, the more upset I got. And then I realized," I had to get this part out, "that it wasn't Rose I was worried about at all. It was me and the fact that I hadn't had a period in six weeks." I looked down at the step. I was on the pill, but nothing was one hundred percent. Here my friend had been gang raped, forced to watch her father's murder and I was selfishly worried about myself.

Jake didn't say anything so I hazarded a glance up at him. He looked confused. Bless his little heart, I was going to have to spell it out for him.

"Jake, you're supposed to get a period about every four weeks. I was two weeks late," I explained. Still nothing. Shit, you think he'd learn something living with sisters. Hadn't Bella talked to him about any of this?

"Jake," I said, "I thought I was pregnant." That's when I realized that he was working it out. He was in shock. Just like I had been.

"I'm not an idiot. I know what that means," he said, a little irritated. "Thought?" he asked. "As in, past tense?"

"Yeah," I continued, "after worrying myself sick for about twelve hours, Cousin Martha showed up with a vengeance."

"Cousin Martha?" he asked, this time really confused.

"It what I call the little lady who lives in my uterus with a bat. She was angry, too. I had cramps like you wouldn't believe. That's why I didn't come to school on Friday." He cringed at the topic.

"So you weren't pregnant?" he asked quietly.

"No," I breathed. Now for the hard part. "And I was so glad. God, I was so fucking relieved I wanted to throw a party." I shuddered at the memory. "But I was also so embarrassed that I'd been so worried over nothing." And that I forgot about Rosalie. What kind of person does that?

I'll tell you what kind of person does that, a selfish one. My life before I got to La Push was completely self-indulgent. The only person I ever thought about was myself and I felt that I was entitled to feel that way because most of my life was just shit. My father left. My mother was no better than a crack whore, though crack was not her drug of choice. I basically raised myself and fucked that up royally. My feelings about abortion were from personal experience. I'd done a lot of things in the past that I regretted and tried really hard to cover my tracks. When the wrong people found out, I ran away to the west coast. I'd basically cleaned up my act; except the alcohol flowed just as freely here as it did there. And so did my stupidity under it's influence, it seemed.

"And that's why you cut me off? Did you think you couldn't trust me with that?" he asked, again thoroughly confused.

"No, no!" I cried. "It's not that at all." I took a deep breath. I felt the little bit of levity I enjoyed explaining female troubles with Jake fade away. "Bella called me that night to answer a text I sent her about Rosalie. I wanted to know how she was doing."

"Oh," Jake said. "Was that when she went back into the hospital?"

"Yeah," I whispered. "She got an infection and now she can't…" This was the part that hurt me so much. "Now she can't have kids, ever." And I began to sob again.

"I know that's hard, Ness. I get it. But I still don't get why that kept you from me for a week?"

"Because I was so grateful that it wasn't me! I was so relieved that I wasn't pregnant and here Rose can never have children ever. Then I was grateful that it was Rosalie and not me. Do you know how selfish that makes me? What kind of person thinks like that? And then the pregnancy scare came back to my mind and that I almost shackled you to me permanently—I couldn't strap you down like that. You are good and so giving. After I realized that you wouldn't be bound to me by a child, I had to give you an out. I don't want to be a dead weight in your life." The tears flowed freely down my cheeks. If he still loved me after all this, I was going to have to tell him about my past.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" he chuckled. He actually chuckled at me. I was pouring my heart out to him—telling him my deepest fears—and he was _laughing_ at me? "How did you get from being relieved that you weren't eighteen and pregnant to thinking you're the most selfish person on the planet and not worthy of me?" He pulled my chin up and over to look at him. "If I'm not mistaken, I was there for every single ejaculation that could have caused a pregnancy. Hell, I probably wanted it more than you. I'm kind of a horny bastard." I had to smile at that.

"But that's not all. I convinced myself that you would be okay if I told you about it," I wiped my face with the palms of my hands.

"And you were right," he said.

"Jake, I haven't told you everything about my past," I said and held his gaze. "What you've seen is a very scaled down version of what I was just two years ago. My life with you—and Billy by extension—has been the most stability I've ever had. I'm afraid, when you find out about all of that, you won't want me anymore." His eyes closed as be put all this together. I watched the anger dissipate, but his brow furrowed in frustration.

"Nothing can be that bad, Ness. Those experiences are what have made you, YOU. Who you are now is who I love. I want to know what you've been through because that is what has made the woman I love." His thumb reached up and traced my jawline. I wanted to believe him so much.

"But that's not all," I continued. "I was behind on my blogging so I was reading the visions of Tenskwatawa. As I was reading them and doing my comparisons with northwestern traditions and even Christian traditions, I realized that there was just too much truth in them to ignore. I started thinking about all of us—Rose and Em, Bella and Jasper—we all have really fucked up families. Edward and Alice are really the luckiest of the bunch. And I started comparing all these things and I came to the conclusion that the Cullens and the Brandons really have a solid moral code that they abide by. It gives them strength in tough times. It binds them in the good times. I want that, Jake." I looked at my fingernails. The hangnail on my thumb was getting really bad. "I lack that and I really want it."

"So?" Jake asked. It was a patient question. He was waiting for the conclusion.

"So, I thought about my life and all the things I needed to do to create that stability for myself." I bit the hangnail off my thumb. It began to bleed. "When I reread the counsel of the Shawnee Prophet it really struck a chord with me. You know, returning to the old traditions and being blessed? I can't explain it, Jake. It was like a mental and emotional explosion-spiritual even-and I knew I had to make some changes."

"Like?" he asked, patiently urging me to continue. He just looked so relieved that I was talking. It was very encouraging.

"Well, it's basically the same things found in all other belief systems: temperance and moderation. I haven't been doing those things." I looked at him begging him to understand. I wanted to be a person who deserved someone as good as Jake. "I want to change my lifestyle. I need to quit the drinking and…" I cleared my throat, "maybe some other stuff." I was so scared that if I tried to make these changes that he'd think I was a big stick in the mud.

"Ness, I still don't understand why this meant you have to cut me off, or why you think you're not worthy of me."

"Because I didn't have the strength to tell you all this," I said and realized that he was right—it didn't make sense. I didn't want to bring up the abortions yet. "I want to quit drinking, Jake. I don't like who I am when I'm drunk. The party at Edward's house…I was just mean to those girls."

"But they deserved it," Jake tried to defend me. I knew what he was trying to do and I was grateful for it. But I didn't need anyone making excuses for me anymore. I needed to just be better.

"Yeah, but who am I to mete out that punishment? We hurt Jasper that night, and that girl Bree. You had to watch me kiss Edward while I was sitting on your lap. If I were sober, I never would have even considered that." He looked down at the ground. He never said it, but I knew it bothered him. "And let's face it, if you weren't shit faced, you wouldn't have allowed it to happen either." He shrugged which told me I was right.

"And, after the pregnancy scare I realized that I am in no way ready for a child. The fact that I was so relieved makes me feel awful." I bit off another hangnail and it, too, began to bleed. He grabbed my hands so I would stop.

"That doesn't make you a bad person, Ness," Jake interrupted. I could see he was relieved, too.

"There are other things I need to tell you, Jake." I tried to pull my hands away to bite more hangnails, but he wouldn't let go. "It wasn't my first scare," I finally whispered.

"Ness, if you're trying to tell me what I think you're trying to tell me, it's not going to matter. I don't care what you did back then." I just nodded. I had to finish my thoughts, though.

"No, but if I'm not ready for a kid, am I truly ready to have sex? I mean one causes the other even if you take precautions." Again he didn't have an answer. "So I was worried that if I make all these changes, how would that make you feel? Would you still want me if I wasn't the same happy-go-lucky Nessie? Would you still want me if I tried to be celibate? If I decided that was the best thing for me?"

"Renesmee Carli Mason! Why do you think so little of me?"

"What?" I didn't understand. He closed his eyes, seemingly to gather strength.

"Why do you think I would care if you got wasted at parties or not?" he asked. "And do you think I'm only interested in your for sex? How can you think so little of me?"

"It's not _you_ I think so little of, Jake." That feeling of guilt and shame washed over me again. I just wanted the ground to open up and swallow me

"Well, stop it," he commanded. "I love you. And I love all of you. I love that we fuck like bunnies, but if you want to stop that, then I can try to be okay with that. Because I am not in love with your vagina. I want to have sex with you because I love you. Period. I've done the whole sex for physical pleasure only. I'm not going back to that." And with that last comment my heart swelled to almost bursting.

But I still had that lingering concern.

"But what if you go off to college and all those girls throw themselves at you—and they will Jake—how am I going to compete with that if you're not being…satisfied?"

"Stop it!" he cried. "You're making me sound like some uncontrolled sex fiend. Is that really how I come across? Or, do you really think that's all you're good for?"

I didn't answer his question. I pulled my legs up again and wrapped my arms around my shins. It was all anyone ever wanted me for back home. I began rocking again.

"Nessie, answer me. Do you really think that's all you're good for?" he asked in a much gentler tone. I pulled my shoulder up to my ear in a sort of half shrug.

"Fuck, I know your dad left," he said, "but that's not because of you. And that fucker who _convinced_ you to give in at age thirteen was a predator." I'd told him about my first time. "As another seventeen year old male, I have no clue what he saw in a thirteen year old. He just saw you as easy pickin's and he should be arrested." I felt him shift next to me again. His arm wrapped around my back and his chin rested on my shoulder. "Ness, I'm not those people. I'm not leaving unless you ask me to. And even then I'll need a big ol' shove." His warm breath eased the tension I'd felt and I let his words wash over me. I climbed back on his lap and just hugged him tight.

I'd hoped he'd feel this way after I told him everything. But I was scared, still. There was really no one who stuck around in my life. I never really had close friends back home. I had a lot of people I hung out with, but no close friends. When I quit partying back home, I was essentially alone because that was all they did. I didn't know how to do this. And I didn't want to lose him.

"Promise?" I finally whispered allowing the hope to bubble up while still clinging to him.

"Ness," he groaned into my neck, "I've never seen you this insecure before. Yes, I promise." He just held me and rocked me.

I cried some more. I cried away all the guilt and shame. I think I cried a little for Rosalie's pain. He just shushed me lovingly and stroked my hair as he held me to his chest.

"And you forgive me for not talking to you for a week?" I asked.

"Only if you promise never to do that to me again." His voice took on a very stern tone, "ever." I just nodded into his chest again. "I love you, Nessie," he said in a tone so full of relief that it almost made me start crying again. I pulled away from his chest so I could look at him.

"And I love you. I love you more than my own life, Jacob Black. And I'm sorry." I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. I didn't know why he loved me so much, but I'm grateful that he did. "Can we go find Billy?"

"What? Why?" he asked surprised.

"I owe him an apology, too." He was still clinging to me as much as I was to him.

"Did he say something to you?" he asked, irritated. "I told him to leave it be."

"He didn't say anything I didn't already know," I said.

"But I wanted you to come to me on your own. Fuck!" he said. Had I made him mad again? Shit. I pulled back to look at him.

"I needed a push, Jake." I raised my hand to his cheek. "I was scared and he reminded me that I wasn't the only one suffering. I'm sorry I was so selfish. Don't be mad at him. I was going to call you soon." He leaned into my touch. "Can I have a kiss?"

"Always, Ness." He pressed his warm lips to mine. It was sweet and needy, but not heated. There was passion, but it wasn't passionate. It was exactly what I needed. What we both needed. How had I been so stupid? Jake made everything better. He made me better.

I could do this with him by my side.

And he wanted to be by my side. No matter what.

We'd just weathered a storm. And he was still my Thunderboy.

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><p><strong>AN: I'm a big believer in the HEA, so have some faith in me. **

**Leave me your thoughts.**


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